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The only thing that’s clear is the wall of security monitors I’m manning.
My father patched us into the OCC’s network, so I can follow Lilah everywhere. In clinic pajamas, she moves from her bungalow to the performing arts center.
When I click to follow, pulling up the interior cams, the long hallways of bulletin boards and crepe paper spark the movie reel of buried memories that I can barely still pretend happened to someone else.
My high, cold walls are breaking.
My head throbs.
Pain I deserve.
“Where is she?” Orion leans over my shoulder. I flinch at the brush of his warm skin, jumping from my chair.
It’s not him I fear.
It’s touch.
Touch will shatter my last support column.
Orion’s apple-scented stress pheromones remind me how close I am to collapse.
They’ll be happier when I disappear.
“Jett.” Orion grabs the chair and rolls it back to the monitors. “You need fucking help, dude.”
“Yes.”
I agree.
But do I deserve it?
“Where’s Lilah?” He takes the mouse, and I step back, calves bumping the coffee table. The others are at HQ, tracking leads on Dominik. Just one afternoon and we already busted a gang planning a full-scale infiltration to get to her.
My phone buzzes in my jacket pocket.
Hikaru: OCC office. Now.
I shudder.
If I step on that land, I’ll shatter.
“What now?” Orion snags my phone. I tuck my hands away, hiding the shake in my fingers.
“Asshole texted everyone but me. I’m going with you.” Orion rises from his chair.
I’m alpha.
It shouldn’t take effort to resist his challenge.
But I’m the one who looks away.
I’m the one who submits.
Weak.
So weak, I hear the voices.
Her voice.
