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One of the few things my brothers don’t know is that I did go see a therapist back in my early twenties. A whole lot of good that did. He told me nothing new that I hadn’t already figured out. I have abandonment issues which is why I walk away from relationships when they start to get serious. There’s no quick fix for that so I stopped wasting my money after a half dozen sessions.
In a conciliatory act, Hunter puts his arm around my shoulders and tells me, “I saw a therapist about a year ago. It helped.”
My head spins in his direction. There’s no joking now. I look over at Blake. He holds out his hands. “What? You think I haven’t spent years with therapists after the shit I saw in Afghanistan with the Army Rangers. I was so fucking messed up after those tours of duty. Bro, it’s nothing to be ashamed about. And you know we’re always here.”
We sit in silence for a few minutes, each of us caught up in a web of our own thoughts.
“Right. Poker anyone?” Hunter says loudly. I flinch in surprise.
But before I can respond, my cellphone vibrates against the solid stone coffee table and I bend to pick it up. It’s Jason asking if I want to join him for a drink at a nearby bar with Allie and Dana.
So, Allie wasn’t going on a date and chose not to correct me earlier. Interesting. My bad mood lifts a little.
“I got a better idea. Let’s meet Jason at Shorties.” I knock back the remains of my whiskey on my way to the kitchen. Shorties is the regular bar we go to when drinking locally because it’s about halfway between Blake’s apartment building and ours.
When my brothers don’t follow, I turn back around to find both of them still sitting in the same positions, staring at me open-mouthed.
“What? Come on. Jase is on his way,” I tell them.
“Why can’t he just come here?” Blake asks, finally standing up.
“Because …” Fuck, after all my denials, how do I now explain the fact that I want to go to a bar where Allie is? I guess there’s no point in pretending that I’m not curious to find out why she didn’t say she was meeting Dana.
“Because?” Hunter asks, still watching me.
“Fine. We’re meeting Allie and Dana there.” Hunter and Blake simultaneously roar with laughter. Assholes.
A short while later we walk into the bar, and my gaze instantly goes to Allie. She doesn’t see me approach the table, but when I speak directly behind her, I notice the way her spine stiffens imperceptibly and her fingers curl tighter around the stem of her glass. Maybe this was a bad idea.
Half an hour later and I’m sure it was a very bad idea. Seated at a table while Allie flirts with some random guy at the bar is not what I had in mind. She’s meant to be ordering drinks for her and Dana, not chatting to some pretty boy.
I’m trying not to stare, but watching Allie has become a habit I’m loath to break. When we’re in the same room my eyes just automatically go to her. She really is beautiful tonight. I watch as she flicks her hair over her shoulder. It’s a sultry, sexy move and the fucking asshole she’s talking to is lapping it up. This is as bad as thinking Allie was all dressed up to go on a date. If I stay though, chances are the guy won’t get any further than talking to her, at worst getting her number. And at that very moment, he takes out his cell and types in something. Unbelievable. She just gave her number to some stranger she’s only been chatting to for five minutes.
Not happening. I push up from my seat and stride across the short distance to stand beside her. “Allie.” I like that I just made her jump. “Do you need a hand with the drinks?”
She turns to me. “I’m good,” she says with barely a glance in my direction and summarily dismissing me before returning to the other guy.
I reach around her with my hand outstretched. “Hi, I’m Logan Carlson. And you are?” The guy shakes my hand reluctantly, his eyes tracking between Allie and me. I can see the cogs in his head grinding away. Let the dude wonder what’s going on. I don’t care what he thinks. I don’t even care that Allie is staring at me with a look that could kill.
Shane, Shawn, or whatever his name is, quickly takes the hint and scuttles back to his group of friends. When he’s out of earshot, Allie spins on her ridiculously high heels and her pointing finger comes out and pokes me in the center of my chest.
“You, Logan Carlson, are an asshole. A cock-blocking asshole,” she grinds out through clenched teeth, and I can’t help smiling back at her. Winding up Allie is more enjoyable than chatting up most other women. And the way her long blood-red nail feels on my skin even through the linen of my black shirt is damn good too.
With a cute final growl, she picks up two of the drinks the bartender has just placed before her and struts back over to our friends. I probably should feel bad, but I don’t.
I glance over to where the guy who was chatting to her is now sitting; he was obviously watching our whole exchange play out. It wipes the smile from my face, and I turn to collect the rest of the drinks.
Allie has moved to a seat between Blake and Dana. And Hunter is staring at me like I’ve lost my mind. I thump his beer on the table in front of him, getting no satisfaction from the spillage. It wasn’t my smoothest move barging in on Allie’s conversation with some guy. But he’s got no right to be judging me; he’s not exactly the gold standard when it comes to relationships with women.
The clock above the bar ticks slowly on and my mood doesn’t improve. Everyone else seems to be having a good time. Dana is laughing at Jason’s jokes, and Allie is laughing at Hunter’s. Seriously, he’s not that funny.
I finish up the dregs of my third beer, Blake has gone home and I’m about to make my excuses, when it looks like everyone else is going to call it a night too.
Outside it’s started to rain. Great. Now I’ve got a wet walk home. Hunter slips away to the bar and comes back with an umbrella. One large umbrella.
He looks at me and shrugs. “Sorry, bro, they only had one.”
“That’s okay, I’ll run. I’ll drop those papers you want off tomorrow,” I tell him. It’s Saturday tomorrow but that doesn’t mean I won’t be working. Allie glances at me and I think she’s going to say something but changes her mind and remains silent. So, I call a quick goodbye to Dana and Jason, zip up my jacket, and I’m off.
