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On Thursday night, I meet Cleo for our second date. She chooses a restaurant by Southbank, a strip of fancy restaurants facing the Yarra River. I agree, and we go to a Greek place, though I start to sweat when I realise how much everything costs, especially when taking into account the wine she orders.
But, while I’m telling a joke, she touches my arm as she laughs, so that makes everything okay. It’s disconcerting, how nice it is to have someone’s undivided attention on you.
On our third date, we go to the National Gallery of Victoria. I muster up the courage to hold her hand, and to my surprise, she doesn’t rip her hand away from mine. Instead, she holds my hand tight and smiles at me.
“And then,” I tell the guys sitting before me, “for our fourth date — which was last night — I kissed her.”
There’s a variety of reactions. Hugo, a blond guy with freckles, grins widely. He was the first friend I made at university. We met at the science department orientation day, when we were in the same group for a treasure hunt activity.
Then there’s Gilbert, who goes by Gilly. He studies business and lives in the same student accommodation building as Hugo, so that’s how I know him. We’re both the middle child out of three siblings, but while being the middle child made me quieter and want less attention, it only made him louder.
He raises a brow. “You waited until your fourth date to kiss her?” he asks.
“I’m shy,” I say, drinking some of my bubble tea so I don’t have to explain myself further.
The four of us are sitting in the university’s cafeteria, which includes all the major fast food and bubble tea chains, as well as sushi, ramen and pizza places. Hugo and Gilly are drinking energy drinks, and Lucas is drinking water, because he’s healthy like that.
Lucas hasn’t said anything the entire time I’ve been talking. Right now, he looks bored, blankly surveying the cafeteria.
“Dude, she totally knows you’re a virgin if you waited until the fourth date to kiss her,” Gilly says.
“Hey, don’t make him feel bad for going at his own pace,” Hugo says and gives me an encouraging smile. “I think you did good.”
“Thanks, Hugo,” I say. “And besides, she knows I’m a virgin anyway.”
Gilly almost spits out his drink.
“We talked about our past relationships on our third date,” I explain. “She knows I’ve never dated anyone before.”
“And what about her?” Gilly asks, leaning forward. “Has she gotten around?”
Hugo punches him in the arm. “Don’t be a dick,” he says while Gilly winces.
“She just said she’s had a few relationships before, nothing serious,” I say. “She was vague about it.”
“Yeah, she’s a ho.” He quickly raises his hands up in surrender before Hugo can punch him again. “I mean that as a term of empowerment, not to slut shame. I’m all for the sexual liberation of women. Equality and feminism, yaddy-yadda-ya.”
Hugo narrows his eyes. “You’re full of shit.”
“I’m not!” Gilly protests, then turns his attention to me. “Did she say anything about her past relationships?”
“A little. She said that all of her exes were crazy.” Last night, while we were sitting on a bench after our first kiss, she started talking about her ex-boyfriend and how he was a piece of shit. She talked about him for a really long time, actually, but then she said that she just wanted to be transparent.
Then she said that she liked me a lot and…wow. It was like I’d just been given a drug or something, because I felt both ecstatic and relieved. It’s such a simple sentence, “I like you a lot”. But it meant a lot to me.
“What do you think, Lucas?” Hugo asks, looking down the table.
“Huh?” Lucas turns to us.
“Were you not listening to anything we’ve been saying?” Gilly demands. “Fine. Here’s the rundown.”
While Gilly talks, Lucas watches me, his expression blank.
Honestly, I’m surprised Lucas became friends with Hugo and Gilly. During high school, he always hung out with the jocks — the type of guys that spent their lunch time playing footy and their class time at the back of the classroom, talking back to teachers. I assumed that since he hung out with idiots, he also had rocks for brains, and then I found out he got into an engineering course.
One day, I invited Hugo and Gilly to the apartment to play some video games on the couch. Lucas was home at the time, and they quickly got along. I can’t say I was surprised — everyone likes Lucas.
Usually, he’s more involved in the conversation, teasing the rest of us and making Hugo and Gilly laugh. Today’s the first time he’s been so withdrawn.
