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“The father…?”
“He—he wants to be involved, but…it’s complicated.” My face starts to crumble and Harriet nods in understanding.
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that life doesn’t always work out the way we want it to. Sometimes the tough circumstances are the best for everyone. Even if in the moment it doesn’t feel that way at all.”
I let her words sink in, the truth of them settling over me. Do I want Nick by my side for this? Yes. Was it hard to push him away when he so clearly wants to be involved? Absolutely.
But can I ruin his life over this? My conscience won’t let me.
“Actually, I…” An idea has popped into my head. I have my first ultrasound scheduled in an hour and a half and no ride. As much as I hate to admit it, Nick was right. Taking the subway to work was a bad idea. When I’ve tried I’m so nauseous and just attempting not to spew my guts on the train floor the whole way.
I explain this to Harriet, asking if there’s any way she can step out for a bit to give me a ride. Taking an Uber to my appointment seems unbearable, and I don’t really want to be alone.
She shakes her head sadly. “I’m so sorry, Blair, I can’t. I’m meeting with a client and—”
I don’t let her finish the apology, thanking her anyway. We step out of the women’s room and go our separate ways, Harriet looking worriedly over her shoulder. The interaction, although I know she meant well, makes me feel even more alone.
A surge of loneliness threatens to take over as my eyes begin to tear up again. I pass my office quickly. Crying in front of my staff would be a bad idea. Instead, I tuck myself away at the end of a hall, in a corner that overlooks the expansive city. From here I can see all the way out to where the buildings bleed into grass.
I bite my lip and try to get my feelings under control. My thoughts go to Nick…
As much as I don’t want to ask him… as much as I’ve been trying to push him away… I need him right now.
Slipping my phone out, I tap onNicholas Weaverand hold my breath as the line rings. For a moment I’m convinced he’s not going to pick up.
“Blair? Is everything okay?”
Tears start streaming down my cheeks at the sound of his worried voice. I nod, remember that he can’t see me, and choke out, “Yes. Everything’s fine, I just… I need a ride. Can you—”
Before I can finish, Nick insists that he’ll be there soon, forty-five minutes at the most. I hear him knock something over in his haste and I bite back a teary smile.
“Hey,” I say, some firmness back in my voice, “listen—you can’t tell anyone about this, okay? And can you pick me up down the street from the office?”
I brace myself for Nick to sound irritated or offended, but instead, he just agrees.
“Of course. I’ll text you when I’m close.”
Chapter 16
Nick
Blairsitsontheedge of the paper-covered examination table looking puny and a little green but overall unfazed about what she is about to do. I can’t understand how she’s so relaxed about all this—my heart keeps racing, and I press a hand to my chest.
“You okay?” she asks, eyes concerned.
All I can manage is a nod.
On the drive here, Blair was quiet for the first few minutes. Then she started to explain how she’s been sick, really sick, and having a hard time. And, how she realized today she doesn’t have anyone to help out with this kind of thing.
So let me in, I’d wanted to say, but held back.
If Blair doesn’t want me involved, she has her reasons. And if we’re being honest, they’re probably good ones. Who would want a grumpy old bachelor in their life?
The tech comes in and goes through the step-by-step of what they’re going to do and look for, and Blair nods along. I try to listen but a strange humming fills my ears—a sensation of anticipation almost overwhelming me as I sit in the chair, breath held.
Blair lays back and the tech applies gel to her lower stomach. She has a barely noticeable bump, and I have a strong urge to reach out and let my fingers graze it.
“Ah, here we go.”
