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She clears her throat. “Forty. You’re forty. And I’m very glad to have been around to see you grow up into such a fine young man. Such a fine, fine young man.”
I chuckle. “Young man isn’t how I’d describe it.”
“Young compared to me, hm?”
For a moment, I consider her face. Crepey with wrinkles in places I didn’t know you could have wrinkles. Yet still the same Gram I remember as a child. It’s such a strange feeling to watch the ones you love grow older. Further in time from you. And yet you’re following them. Right to the end. One day, people will feel the same about you.
If you’re lucky.
“I know how motivated you are. You’ve been running your own firm for years, you make the family very proud. Following your own road in order to succeed. I’ve… I’ve just never known how to motivate you.” Gram lifts her chin and looks up at the clouds. Are there… tears in her eyes? “I thought the inheritance would motivate you to something else. Something I couldn’t see you going after without a little…”
I look away. Is that how heartless people think I am? That I might only go looking for love if there’s a cash prize at the end?
Is that how heartless I actually am, considering how far I went to get that prize?
“I’m not a modern woman, you know. I still think that you should want the conventional things in life. And Caroline has challenged me often in that regard. You know, wanting to be a businesswoman and taking over the work for me. I respect that. Still, though, I want… I want you both to find love. That’s what life really is all about. I’m not sure I’ve taught any of you well in that regard.”
I smile. “We love you, Gram.”
“That’s not what I mean, my dear, but thank you.”
We are both quiet. The rain pours.
“I was so angry at the wedding. That you would go so far as to trick me. Especially with Jude. I was furious with her too. But…” She shakes her head. “You can’t fake what I saw. You both aren’t that good of actors. I hope not, at least.”
My brow pinches and I sigh. “I don’t think we are.” The operative word being “think” because how can I really know when I’ve done such tremendously dishonest things in the name of an inheritance?
“If you are, I’d highly recommend getting an agent. What a show.”
We exchange a look. Gram’s wearing a wry smile on her lips.
“A joke, Chase.”
“I’m not used to you joking.”
“Yes, well. I suppose I’m not either.”
We both sip our coffee. The rain is starting to let up, just a bit. I can sort of spy the clouds breaking in the distance to give way to late evening sun.
Gram puts her coffee to the side and wraps my free hand in both of hers. “Tell me the truth. About you and Jude.”
I drop my gaze into my lap.
“Please. Tell me. You owe me that.”
“I know, I do, just give me a minute.” And as I begin to figure out where to start, where the beginning of this story is, I start to break. Tears fill my eyes, tears I haven’t let fall in God knows how long. The rain is letting up for me, giving way to my own torrential downpour.
Gram holds me fiercely in her arms, tucking my head against her shoulder.
I can’t manage much, but what I can manage is the hardest truth I know. “I love her. I love her. I love her so much.”
“Oh, honey, I know you do. I could see it in your eyes. I could see it in every part of you.”
“I just… I just wanted us to… have the right kind of story.”
Gram laughs, not unkindly, and kisses the back of my head as she rubs my back. “We can never control the way the story is told when we aren’t the writers, Chase.
“It’s not fair.”
