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Amazing. What would it be like to never have a headache? I couldn’t fathom it. “Then you should go get in the machine. It’ll help you.”
Crew shook his head. “I don’t want any more medicine right now, thanks. I think I need to just give it time. They always told us, if we missed our treatments, we’d feel like hell. But don’t you worry, because it’s going to be okay. Maybe I just need to rest for a bit? It’ll pass. I’m not being clear, sorry, Raven. I’ve stopped going in the machine that takes away sexual feelings.”
It was news to me, and although the idea should have frightened me, it didn’t. He suffered through pain simply because he wanted to be with me? Or at least I hoped that was why he did it.
“Is there food?” I rose. I could feed us while he wasn’t feeling well.
He made a sound I decided was an affirmation, and I spotted what looked like a fridge unit nearby. I didn’t find much food inside, but a few small, wrapped packages lay on the shelves. I didn’t know if it was from Lightning Man or if Crew and Gator had brought fresh food. Either way, I wasn’t starving right then, but it was good to know it was there.
We were out of the earshot of others. The idea sizzled through me, full of possibilities, but it also seemed a strange thought on a planet filled with Super Soldiers. The sound of Crew’s deep, even breathing caught my attention. He was where I had left him, but his relaxed posture suggested deep sleep. His face, however, wasn’t restful. Pain clenched the muscles of his jaw, rippling across his expression like lightning.
I wished I could fix it for him, but he said no more machines. I wondered if he kept me on the ship not solely for privacy but also to hide his own pain. Amias told me stories about what happened if you seemed weak but were one of their kind.
I discarded the thought quickly, though, as Crew stayed honest with me to a fault. Although it might suit him to give himself some privacy, I honestly believed his motive was for my sake.
I sat down next to him, smoothing my hand across his brow. He started to open his lids, but I shushed him, drawing him down so his head was on my lap. Stone had headaches when we were kids, and I used to rub his forehead. It helped some, he claimed. If I could offer Crew some relief, I wanted to give it freely.
It didn’t hurt that I liked to touch him. He always smelled clean and male at the same time. He never touched me without my consent, and when he did touch me, his skin sent shivers through mine. He led these men, and the best leaders led by example.
The beautiful man, with his soft skin and long fingers, was nothing like Clarke or his associates. Nothing like any of the other men I knew before, if I were being entirely honest.
I ran my fingers through his hair, feeling the soft strands streak like silk across my palms. My hair wasn’t so soft, and I wondered if it was a product he used or just another trait of their superior genes.
Long moments passed, while shadows from nearby trees stretched slim, dark fingers to slice across the room. His even breaths continued, his face nuzzling tighter against my stomach with a sigh as the breeze teased the leaves outside the window. After a time, his arms slid around my waist, holding me in his arms even as he continued to sleep. Outside, the light started to dim, as the afternoon waned.
My stomach growled, reminding me I hadn’t eaten. Although I could go without food if the need arose, I didn’t have to at the moment. I moved slowly, gently reorienting him on the bed before I snuck back to the small fridge. The packets of food turned out to be dried meats, familiar to me as Amias taught us to make them, and we often ate them as snacks on long walks. I wondered if the making of the cured meat was a lesson Amias learned from Crew or perhaps just part of their standard training. Since I learned he could cook the whole time and never told us, Amias’ meat seemed somehow less impressive.
I took a bite and tears flooded my eyes, surprising me. The taste was a little bit like having Amias back, and I choked on a startled sob. I wiped the tears away and pushed away the memories. Crew might be out of it, but he’d hear my distress if I didn’t calm down. The last thing I wanted was to wake him up because I was crying over dried meat. I scrubbed my face with my palms then finished my food.
Cleaning myself up was harder, because I wasn’t sure how everything worked on board their ships. Luckily, the med pod seemed to have somehow refreshed me, so I wiped down with a towel and felt much better.
A sound from Crew jerked me around, as I recognized it as meaning pain. I quickly rejoined him on the bed, and he gratefully wrapped his arms around me, as if finding a lifeline in a storm.
We all need someone sometimes. Even Super Soldiers.
10
TURNING THE PAGE
I must have fallen asleep. Morning light shone through the windows of the shuttle when I next opened my eyes. Behind me, with his arms still around my middle, and his breath on my neck, Crew still slept. I wondered if any other Super Soldier slept so long before undrugged, but then noticed another change since we’d fallen asleep.
Crew was hard, and his cock—his large and very hot cock which pressed up against the seam of my ass—seemed very happy this morning.
A man awakening hard wasn’t something new for me. Although I chose not to rest around clients, men frequently dozed off afterward then awakened wanting another round of the play from the night before. But Crew was different, somehow. For one, I wanted to know him intimately. I bit my lip, imagining how it would feel if I pushed myself back to feel his hardness press even harder against me, or even better, if I rocked just a bit…
I moaned, because imagining the sensation had my body clenching in need. Was this desire, the emotion so many talked about, but I never truly experienced? I pushed away the thought, irritated with myself.
He wasn’t feeling well, and he never agreed to be the object of my fantasies. Crew’s cock might be hard, but the response could be sheerly biological. Maybe he was having a great dream. Maybe he was thinking about somebody else. I gulped at that thought, because it bothered me more than it should.
Maybe he was just hard because his body was waking up after basically being chemically castrated his whole life?
Crew made a sound in the back of his throat, a little bit like a moan, then shifted his hips a smidge before tightening his arms around me.
“Is it really morning?” he whispered, his voice all gruff from being unused. “I fell asleep around lunch time.”
I ran my hand over his, the knuckles still scraped from his battles. “I know. You needed the rest. How are you feeling?”
His breath washed against my neck so evenly, for a moment I wondered if he’d fallen back asleep. I startled when his deep voice growled over my skin again. “Well, a little bit in awe. They stuck me in that machine when I was sixteen. I—it’s been a long time, and I think I forgot what this felt like. Never before have I awakened to find myself pressed up against the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, so between the two sensations, it’s rather incredible.”
