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I sigh and start circling high overhead, keeping my vision focused on her. I’m not exactly sure how I’ll manage to help her without revealing myself to her if the need arises, but I can’t just leave her to her own devices. Besides, if she tells people that a dragon rescued her from danger on a solo mountain climb, people will just assume it’s a delusion brought on by hypothermia or altitude sickness.
I circle and can’t help but fixate on how truly beautiful she is.
ChapterTwo
The Fall
Sienna
Remember when I told you a lot of my friends think that I'm crazy about mountain climbing alone in a remote wilderness area? Remember how I think they're silly and just don't understand me?
Well, let me tell you in no uncertain terms that the Alaska Range is a hell of a lot more challenging than any of the mountain ranges I've climbed in the past. Let me tell you that I'm afraid.
I'm very afraid.
All my friends are right. I'm a crazy girl. There's no doubt about it. I know this is going to seem dramatic or even stupid but let me tell you that I'm certain I'm going to die on this mountain. Twenty-two years. That's all I get. It's icy and snowy and... I'm so exhausted I'm just clinging to handholds but not really able to move up at all.
This is the end.
No, damn it!
As I cling to the icy wall, struggling to maintain a grip, I can't help but wonder if this is it. Is this going to be the end of me? The bitter cold seeps through my bones, and I can barely feel my fingers, let alone the rest of my body. I have never felt so alone and scared in my life. Every fiber of my being is telling me to give up, to let go and let myself fall, but I can't do that. It's natural for me to feel this way under the circumstances but... well...
No, damn it!
I can't let my life end like this.
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and focus on steadying myself. I must keep going. I must keep trying. I can't let fear control me. Slowly but surely, I begin to move up the mountain again, inch by painful inch. Every muscle in my body aches, and my mind screams at me to stop, to turn back, to give up.
I can't turn back. Not even possible.
Icangive up but that means letting go and just making death come quickly.
No matter how my body and mind scream at me, I won't give in. If I die, it won't be because I give up. Hell no. I push on. As I continue to climb, I can feel my body becoming numb. The wind howls around me, and I can barely see through the falling snow. I begin to wonder if anyone will even find me if I fall. But I shake the thought away. I can't let myself go down that path.
No, damn it!
I force myself to take one step up at a time, each movement taking all my strength. I mean, whoever came up with the idea of one step at a time probably never thought the steps including clinging to tiny imperfections on the face of a mountain, for fuck’s sake. Still, I force myself to move forward regardless of the situation. The fear is still there, but I know I can't let it control me. I have to keep going. I repeat my mantra in my mind.No, damn it!
As I climb, I can feel the ice below my fingers beginning to crack. My heart jumps into my throat as I struggle to find a new grip. I can't afford to make a mistake. I can't afford to fall.
It takes every last bit of strength I have, but I finally make it to a ledge large enough for me to pause and regain my strength. I collapse onto the snow, gasping for air. I made it!
Except the ledge is all packed snow, no rock. It disintegrates under me and sends me hurtling toward the ground.
Did you know that human babies are born with only two natural fears? Every other fear, we learn.
One fear we learn at birth is the fear of loud noises. That fear makes a lot of sense. Things that make loud noises are rarely good things from an evolutionary perspective. Predators make loud noises. Lightning makes thunder—a damned loud noise. Earthquakes, avalanches, tsunamis, hurricanes, tornadoes—all loud noises, all very good at killing people.
The other fear that we’re born with is the fear of falling. That one makes sense too. If falling were a pleasant sensation, a lot of human children would seek out chances to fall. Since humans aren’t very good at surviving multiple broken bones, shattered skulls, and serious internal trauma; we probably wouldn’t do very well as a species if we liked falling. So, we’re born with a desire to avoid situations where we might fall.
I’m falling right now, and I have to say, my fear of falling isveryhealthy. It’s strange, though. I don’t scream. I always thought if I had a chance to foresee my death, I would scream or freak out, but I don’t. In fact, I don’t react much at all other than to curl into a ball and hope that I die quickly and don’t spend hours wasting away in a broken, painful body.
I suppose I’m in a little bit of shock. That would explain why I’m not screaming, flailing, or begging God to save me. It would also explain why it feels like I’m falling for ages even though it’s only a hundred feet or so down to the ledge below me. I should have hit that ledge in a few seconds, but it feels like I’ve been falling for several minutes.
Actually, it doesn’t feel like I’m falling at all. It feels like I’m floating.
I suppose that makes sense. With my eyes closed, and being in a state of shock, the cold air rushing past me as I fall could seem like floating.
