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I quickly register for their news archives and search for Jade’s accident, along with any other news from the following week, hoping something will stand out.
Anything.
But after a good hour, it’s safe to assume that like everything else, it’s useless.
I’m hunched over, my eyes wide as I stare at the screen, when Sara appears.
“Whatcha doing?” she asks from behind me, making me jump up, almost knocking her over.
“Jesus,” I screech as my hand flies to my chest. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”
Sara raises an eyebrow but doesn’t otherwise react. Instead, she crosses her arms over her chest and stares. “Well?” she asks again.
“You can clearly see what I’m doing,” I note but hate that I was busted when I told everyone—including her—I was moving on.I’m not. I just needed everyone to back off.None of them know I’ve been talking with my therapist, that I’m back to square one. I’m not ashamed. I’m just not ready for the questions. And that’s okay. I feel good about my decision.
“Why don’t you call him and ask for the truth?” Sara suggests, like it’s a new idea and not something I’ve been stewing over every single day since he left. Or more accurately, since I sent him away.
“I know you only met him for a few minutes,” I say. “But he’s not very forthcoming.” A nice way of saying he’s likely to spin some bullshit answer.
After I was sent home from the hospital, I broke down and told Sara everything about Jesse and me, including what I knew about the accident. Which I guess means she officially knows more than my therapist. I needed someone in my corner. Someone that wasn’t family, since my family is too close to this entire situation.
And then I told her I was fine. I was moving on.
“Believe it or not,”—Sara giggles—“I actually got that impression of Jesse during our short exchange,” she says. “Especially when he ran off to find you without any explanation. We could have helped.”
“I’m assuming he didn’t want the help. He obviously doesn’t want me to remember what happened. And if Ihadremembered, he probably didn’t want anyone around.”
Sara frowns. “I’m sorry you’ve been through all of this, and that it had to be Jesse.”
“Me too. Thank you for not telling me to go to the police.” I may be pissed at him right now, but I’d never report him.
Sara’s hands lift to her hips and she frowns. “As I said when you first told me, you should tell the police. Youabsolutelyshould, but I do understand why you want to hold off.”
“Oh yeah?”
“You care about him.” She smiles warmly as I roll my eyes.
“I had a crush and it’s over,” I lie…to her and myself.
Sara’s eyes widen before she playfully shakes her head. “If you say so.”
I gape. “God, you sound like Pippa sometimes.”
Sara laughs, bumping her shoulder into mine. “While she’s away, I’m your replacement big sister.”
“What about Ashley?” I ask, biting back a smile.
“I’m going to pretend you didn’t just compare me to Ashley. I know how you feel about her.”
“You’re nothing like her,” I say, pulling her into a hug as my tablet screen fades to black, drawing my attention.
Sara looks between me and the screen, her brow furrowed as she worries her bottom lip. “Did it help at all?” she asks after a beat.
“Not yet. It’s hard when my parents kept my name out of everything. I can’t search for Willow Sanders and see it all pop up.” I frown, bringing the screen back to life before punching in the password. “I know I—”
“Wait!” Sara exclaims, grabbing my shoulders to spin me around. “I can’t believe I forgot.”
“Forgot what?”
