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Older, lined, scarred. There was a mark Jakob didn't recognize slashing its way through Ethan's right eyebrow and another graze across his opposite cheek. A small black hoop in his right ear, and crows feet at the corners of his eyes.
Jakob swallowed hard, though whether from the surprise or all the questions suddenly welling up in his throat — where he had been, what he had done, what had brought him here of all the places in the world? But he shoved them all down and tucked them safely away. Because after all this time, he wasn't sure… wasn't sure he had that right, not anymore.
But still — that same face, thathandsomeface — which Jakob could admit so easily now, after so much time wasted trying to deny it —
Ethan'sface.
Ethan washere.
God — how long had it been?
"Dad?" came Cassie's voice, as if from far away. He frowned as he found himself lurching suddenly into the present through the veil of years and memories, almost surprised to turn and find her at his elbow.
"Dad, are you okay? Do you need to go back home?" she asked, sounding worried; an odd juxtaposition with the holiday music playing merrily in the background. Sounded as if that hadn't been the first time she had tried to get his attention either, Jakob realized with a start.
"Everything alright?" came Ethan's voice and Jakob looked up as his old friend started walking their way, concern written all over that all-too-familiar face.
"Yeah, I'm — I'm fine. Just… didn't expect to see you here is all. It's been a while," Jakob said, feeling Cassie's hand resting gently on his shoulder as he answered them both, his gaze firmly on Ethan. He cleared his throat, trying once again to keep back all the questions struggling to claw their way up it, to choke him for the want of asking. Instead, he went with the simplest, the most harmless he could think of. "You, uh… You here for the class?"
"You could say that," Ethan said with a wry grin that pulled just a little at the small scar on his bottom lip, one that Jakob remembered how he got all too well. "Teach it, actually."
"Oh, good. That's… good. That's really… good," Jakob told him. Mentally, he winced, knowing full well how awkward he must sound. "You were always great at it. Glad to see you kept at it."
"Yeah… it's uh… yeah," Ethan replied, glancing away as he frowned slightly. "Almost didn't. But then it — it helped. When I tore up my ACL, I mean," he said, gesturing to his knee. "Found myself with a lot of free time, and… seemed like as good a way to fill it as any other."
"Oh," Jakob replied, uncertain how else to reply.
"Look, I've got to start the class in a few minutes," Ethan said with a quick glance at his watch. "But — stick around after, alright? We should catch up. Maybe you'll even tell me who your chaperon here is."
Jakob flushed, turning to Cassie just in time to spot the look of amused delight flashing across her face. It was an expression Jakob knew could only spell trouble. But he plowed on ahead anyway, hoping he didn't sound as flustered as he felt. "Ethan, this is my daughter, Cassie. And Cassie, this is… Ethan. He's an old… an old friend."
"Notthatold," Ethan grumbled as he reached out to offer his hand for Cassie to shake. "Nice to meet you, Cassie. I have loads of embarrassing stories about your Dad if you'd ever like to hear them."
Jakob could feel his neck flushing again as he herded her away from a chuckling Ethan and over to some of the still-empty chairs. They’d been set up in a rough circle around a small table, on which sat a jumbled arrangement of colorful plastic toy dinosaurs.
Some of the seats had already been claimed by art students who had arrived before them, or saved for friends arriving late. More people had filed in behind Jakob and Cassie, and it wasn't long until all the seats were filled with chattering would-be artists; the noise filling the small space and then some, the scrape of a chair being dragged over to the group making Jakob wince.
In the meanwhile, Ethan had set up a desk lamp — one of the kind with a bendable neck and hood like the little hopping animated character. He turned it on to reveal a bulb that could rival the sun for brightness in the otherwise darkened coffee shop.
Soon enough, Ethan had them all hard at work drawing the still life scene; the loud chatter dying down to only the soft susurration of pencil and charcoal against textured paper; the scents of graphite and paints and chalk and inks mixing with the rich smell of coffee that was probably imbued into the walls at this point.
An old, familiar peacefulness settled into Jakob's chest. It blurred all the edges of the world as his focus narrowed to the motion of his hand, the shape of a curve, the fall of light and shadow almost rendering itself onto the paper.
Before Jakob knew it, he had filled three pages.
Okay,four —but that last didn't count because it was barely a sketch. It was only when Cassie had snuck a peek and giggled that he realized he had been absentmindedly doodling Ethan instead of the dinosaurs. The giggling had only doubled when he’d hastily cleared his throat and flipped the page over.
And then the class came to an end, his fellow artists all chatting with each other around him once more as they picked up their supplies and coats. Sketchbooks and lapboards tucked under their arms, the herd had filed back out through the doorway to the sound of the sleigh bells hanging above the coffee shop's door as they left.
Soon it was just Ethan and him and Cassie. And then just Ethan and him, with Cassie's far too cheerful "I'll wait for you out in the car Dad, take your time!" ringing in his ears. Biting his lip, Jakob turned to face the man he once knew better than his own self.
Who now, after all the years and regrets that lay between them, Jakob wasn't certain he knew at all.
Chapter 4
Jakob sucked in a sharp breath as Ethan's other hand came up to grip his head roughly, before lips slammed into his for a messy, utterlybrutalkiss.
It was sloppy and hard, the wet warmth of Ethan's mouth damn near all-consuming. It felt impossible to keep up; there was nothing soft or gentle found here, no flirtatious teasing. No — this kiss was all power and demand, challenge and warning. It was like nothing Jakob had ever known in a kiss before, sending a thrill shooting through his entire body; an engine igniting inside him, roaring into life…
