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I know for sure that the heart I keep denying I got exists when I watch him let go of his pride and sob his heart out. He holds Dalton’s cold, pale hand the same way I did while I stand back and watch, taking in what he said about Mom and letting it sink in.
“Go be with your brothers. I’ll speak to Nelson when he gets here.”
“Garrett and Wade are gonna wanna say goodbye,” I tell him.
“I won’t let ‘em take him before they get here,” Mitch promises.
I pull up at the line camp and see Wade sitting on the porch step drinking a bottle of Jack to himself, he looks every bit as broken as I feel. I approach him as he knocks the bottle back and sighs heavily.
“She’s in there. Tied to a chair. I had to come out here because I couldn’t look at her,” he confesses.
“So it’s true? What Mitch said… She killed Dal—”
“Don’t. I don’t wanna hear it again.” He tenses his jaw to try and contain his tears. “Garrett and Maisie are at the hospital getting the little one checked out.”
“She’s okay?” I check, knowing it would break Garrett’s heart if anything happened to his little girl. It’d break mine too, just ‘cause I ain’t the most hands-on uncle that don’t mean I don’t love ‘em.
“Yeah, seems that way, the car crashed after Garrett blew out the tires but it was only minor. She was strapped in.”
“She wasn’t breathing. Leia said she…”
“It was all part of the plan, Cole,” Wade interrupts me. “She knew Maisie wouldn't have let her take the babies anywhere alone. Tonight was her perfect opportunity. Leia reckons she gave the baby something to make her drowsy. Finn’s taken the bottle she found to the hospital so the docs can check out what it was.”
“What a fuckin’ mess.” I take off my hat and slide my hands through my hair.
“How do we fix this one, Cole?” My little brother turns his head to me looking worried.
“I ain’t ever wanted to hurt a woman before, but…”
“I feel ya.” I rest my hand on his shoulder and squeeze, the anger inside me raging hot and sizzling through my veins and I haven’t even laid my eyes on the bitch yet.
We drink what's left in the bottle between us, and stay silent while we wait for my brother. I toss a few more logs on the fire that Wade must have started before I got here and stand staring into the flames wondering what comes next. My phone rings and when I see Savannah’s name flash up. I feel bad for how I yelled at her back at the Bunkhouse. None of this is her fault. All she wanted to do was comfort me.
I pick up, purely because I wanna hear the sound of her voice again.
“Cole.” I hear the relief in her voice when I answer and wonder what the hell I ever did to deserve it. “I’ve been worried.”
“No need, you got Tate at the house with ya, right?”
“Yeah he’s here, but I meant I’ve been worried about you.” Her words cause another tiny crack in my heart.
“No need for that either,” I tell her, kicking the stones under my feet and reminding myself to keep her at arm’s length.
“Cole, me, and Leia have been feeling kinda helpless and we’ve been trying to make sense outta everything.”
“Well, that's your first mistake. There is no sense in this.” I shake my head and think about Dalton again.
“But there are things that have led up to this. Things we’ve all missed.”
“What kind of things?” I screw my face up in confusion, I’m usually pretty good at picking up on shit, but I did not see this one coming. Maybe that’s why I feel as scared as I am angry.
“Well, Maisie’s been feelin’ really rotten lately, because of that she’s kind of had to step back and let Teresa help with a lot more. She’s been exhausted and confused…”
“Garrett said she went to the doctor yesterday, right?”
“She also told Leia that she spent a few years getting sober before she came back to Fork River,” Savannah mentions, which is news to me. Mom never told us she had a problem.
“Well, most people who have spent so long getting sober don’t tend to drink after.” She makes a valid point, I’ve seen Mom drink plenty of times since she’s been here.
