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My eyes narrow. I cross my arms over my chest.
Tristan senses the shift in my demeanor. He sighs, then crosses the room and takes my hands into his. “You know I have to go, baby. I told you already, I—”
“I don’t understand why you won’t let go.” I drop his hands from mine.
“Letgo?” His eyes round. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, I am. Your wife doesn’t love you, Tristan. You’ve even admitted this to me several times.”
Eight, to be exact, but who’s counting?
Tristan shakes his head and turns around, searching for his key fob. “I’m not having this argument with you again, Meredith.”
“As long as you continue sticking your dick in my mouth, we will have this conversation.”
He stills, then slowly turns. It’s his turn to be mad. “You knew—youknow—the circumstances of my marriage. I have made it very clear to you since day one.”
I shake my head. “No, that’s not correct. Don’t play me like that. The plan has always been for you and me to be together.”
“Someday, yes—”
“When, Tristan?When?”
“When I get shit figured out, okay?”
“Your wife is a bitch. She always has been. Even before everything happened. She is a stone-cold, heartless bitch.”
Tristan doesn’t respond. He can’t because he knows it’s true. Everyone in town knows it’s true.
“Your problems started long before your son went missing. Now?” I snort. “Nina doesn’t even acknowledge your existence—or anyone’s, for that matter. You deserve better.” I step forward and grab his hands. “You deserve better, Tristan, youhaveto know that.”
He looks down.
Guilt. Will he ever get over it?
Damn Nina.
“I’m trying to get her on medication,” he says finally, “or to agree to see a therapist.”
“You’ve been trying for years.”
“Yeah, but there’s this new doctor in town. That’s who the appointment is with ...” He glances at the plastic clock on the wall. “In an hour.”
“She won’t go. Jesus, how many times does this have to happen? James has been gone forseventeenyears. He’s not coming back. You’ve accepted it, and she hasn’t. She’s totally lost her mind. You’ve set up a hundred medical appointments for her, and she won’t go.”
“I have to keep trying.”
“No, you don’t!”
“I can’t leave her like this!” he bellows back.
Someone bangs on the other side of the wall, knocking the clock off its thumbtack. It clatters to the floor.
We stare at the cracked face for a minute, a million words teetering on our tongues.
I want to threaten to leave him. Give him a deadline. If he doesn’t leave his wife in (insert number of months here), then I will leave him. The thing is, he knows it would be a lie. After all, I’ve threatened to do exactly that a dozen times over the last two years, and I’ve never once followed through.
Have you ever been so in love with someone that life without them is inconceivable? Because there is simply no life without them. They are as much of your existence as your own beating heart.
