AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I dragged myself home and got into the shower, ready to wash the day away. The smell of grease always clung to you, but I’d figured out the right combination of soap to at least get it off of me for a bit. Shower, check. Clean clothes, check — I’d even gotten dressed in the bathroom this time to avoid any awkward run-ins with Adrian.
I’d liked the feeling of his gaze on my skin just a little too much, even if I had constantly worried he was judging me. But then, that was nothing new. I was always afraid that he was looking at me and thinking I was just never going to be good enough.
I was in that weird space where my body was exhausted, but my mind was racing and I wasn’t ready to go to bed. I was restless, though, and I didn’t feel like doing much of anything. I hesitated, glancing at Adrian’s door as I went downstairs. The light was still on, and I stared at it for a moment.
I licked my lips, wanting to make some sort of overture, but I didn’t know what. It was always tricky, and even though we’d had a moment in our parents’ room, and we were tentatively getting along, that didn’t necessarily mean anything.
Well. It would be okay to make sure he was safe, right? He hadn’t seemed to know what he was doing with the plug, and it was only fair that I ask what his progress was…
I hesitated again, then knocked on the door, half hoping he wouldn’t answer. He did.
Adrian opened the door a few inches, not enough to be welcoming but enough for me to see he was only wearing cotton sleep pants and not much else. Great. “Hi.” His tone was cautious, like he wasn’t sure how to react. “How was work? Um, everything okay?”
I tried not to look at his chest. Fuck, I was such a perv. I guess it was partially because I didn’t feel like I knew my brother very well, so he might as well have been a stranger.
Right. I’d keep telling myself that.
“Yeah, it was fine,” I said awkwardly, wiping away a stray drop of water as it slid down from my still damp hair. “I just wanted to… you know, check on you.” Adrian blinked at me and it took him a few seconds before he responded. “I’m fine?”
Was that a question?
“You know, the project…”
He finally looked down at the floor, not able to meet my gaze. “I’m… it’s… fine… Yes, it’s fine.”
“You know, that would be more convincing if you could say it and look me in the eyes.”
His head came up a little. “It’s fine?”
What the fuck?
“Right. Which is why you suddenly realized that the floor is old as fuck and looks like a cat got dragged across it,” I said, trying to keep my voice dry, but the words were half-hearted. I didn’t want to push him, but I didn’t want to lose what little ground we’d gained either.
Adrian frowned and looked back down at the floor, that time with a quizzical look on his face. “I don’t know how to clean carpet. Do you?”
“Not the point.”
“I… um… I haven’t done any more work on the project. It’s… It’ll be fine.” He shook his head and looked up from the carpet. “I have more time. I’ll get it done.” “Uh huh,” I said, not even bothering to try to hide my skepticism.
My heart was beating a little faster. My gaze slid down a little, looking at his chest and wondering what it might feel like to—
He noticed me looking, and his cheeks reddened a little. He turned so it wasn’t as easy to look, and I berated myself for not only looking but also being caught. I pretended it hadn’t happened.
“Do you need… you know… any help?” I finally ventured, fully bracing myself for a horrified, disgusted reaction.
Instead, his mouth opened and closed several times and I could see different emotions running across his face, but they were too fast to follow.
Finally, he just looked at me. “The puppies online always have a master.” Was that a yes… Was that a no?
“It was a multiple-choice question, not fill in the blank.” It came out dry and sarcastic, but Adrian just smiled, the first one since I’d knocked.
“I’m a rebel.”
Now I was the one cracking a smile. “Sure. But does the rebel need help on his… research?”
Adrian turned and looked at something behind him and then back at me. “I…” His gaze dropped to the carpet again.
He managed to move his gaze from the carpet to somewhere near my knees. I guess it was a start. “I… Maybe? I don’t want to… I can’t ask someone else… There isn’t really anyone, and it’s… personal. I guess?”
