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And that the things she thought were gone forever actually weren’t.
She flinched but didn’t move away. And even though he hated the flinch, he knew they were making progress.
It might be a matter of two steps forward, one step back. But as long as they were going forward, he could deal.
“We’re not going to let him win, Hannah.”
“I think he already has.”
“No, baby. But it’s okay if you’re having doubts. I’m sure enough for the two of us.”
“Why are you really here, Raid? I’m nothing special. I’m not worth all the bother I’m going to give you. It’s amazing that you want to help me. You keep saying the right things, well, mostly, but I just don’t get it. Before, I was just Hannah. Kind of quiet and boring. Now, it’s worse. I’m broken-Hannah.”
“I’m going to kill that motherfucker.” He kept his voice soft, even though that was extremely hard when he wanted to yell the words.
She still gasped, her eyes wide. But at least she didn’t pull away.
“You are not broken, Hannah.”
The look she gave him was full of pity. So was the pat on his arm. It was the first time she voluntarily touched him since she returned home to Haven, and it was a pity touch.
Eh, what the hell, he’d take it.
She was touching him. And he was touching her.
That was far more than he’d thought they would have today. His phone buzzed but he ignored it.
No way was anyone interrupting this conversation. It was too important.
“I am. I’m so broken, I don’t even know where all the pieces are. I’m just trying to patch them together with duct tape and a bit of prayer. Don’t you see it, Raid?”
He raised his other hand to cup her face. “What I see is a seriously beautiful girl who’s been through something traumatic. I see someone who is kind and caring and sweet. She might be trying to hide herself behind an icy mask, but there’re cracks in that mask. And while parts of her might have changed, the core of her is the same. And there’s no telling who this new Hannah might be.”
“She’s nothing good. You deserve better.”
Oh, hell no.
“And you just earned yourself a spanking.”
She tensed. “Raid.”
“Not now. Obviously, you’re not ready for that.” He dropped his hands to the counter. “But when you are, you’ll be getting one for ever suggesting shit like that. I’m the one who doesn’t deserve you. I’m not going to let that stop me from having you, though.”
“I can’t give you me.”
“Baby, you already are. You cried in my arms. That’s the start of it.”
“You’re impossible. This can’t happen.”
“Nothing has ever been impossible for a Malone.”
“Lord help me. You’re not even joking, are you?”
“Nope. This is happening. But I can be generous. I’ll give you some time to get your head around it.”
“Right,” she said. “How much time?”
“I don’t know. A day or two.”
“So generous.”
“I thought so.”
She narrowed her gaze at him, but he just smiled. “You might not be ready to talk about what happened, and I can be patient. But that patience will only go so far. I’m going to convince you to tell me. To give me that burden, those fears. Otherwise, it’s going to stand between us. And I won’t allow anything to do that. Not even you.”
“I feel like yesterday I went to sleep in one universe and this morning I woke up in another.”
“Welcome to the universe of Raid Malone. It can be a bit rocky at times, so you might want to find someone strong to hold on to. And in case you don’t pick up what I’m putting down, I mean me.”
“Does anyone say that anymore?”
“I just did. Now, there’s nothing in your cupboards. Not even enough to feed a mouse. Which, don’t freak out, I think you might have one.”
“Oh yeah, I definitely do.”
“Ah, you didn’t think to put down some mousetraps, darlin’?”
“Well, no.”
“Because . . .”
“That might hurt him.”
“They’re meant to kill the mouse, that’s the idea. To get rid of it.” His phone buzzed again, and he sighed.
She chewed her lip. “I know. It just seems mean.”
“Baby, you can’t live in an apartment with mice. I’m gonna get you some traps.”
“But what if the traps catch the mouse?”
He just stared at her, not sure what she was asking.
“What do I do with the . . . with the body?”
Oh, now he understood what she was asking. “I’ll take care of it, baby.”
She bit her lip, looking worried. But then she nodded. She seemed to sag, obviously completely done in. Raid wasn’t sure whether to first feed her or put her down for a nap.
“Baby, are you sure you won’t reconsider going to the hospital for tests?”
“It was just a bit of low blood pressure. You said you wouldn’t take me.”
