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He placed a hand on her chest. “Breathe, Hannah.”
She shook her head. She couldn’t! Already, she could feel herself slipping into unconsciousness.
“Hannah, please, breathe.”
Lord, she wished she could. Panic held her in its grip. Why couldn’t she breathe?
A change came over his face. It was filled with fierce determination. “Hannah, fucking breathe. Right. The. Fuck. Now.”
Shit. There was pure command in his voice, and she managed to take a small breath.
“You can breathe. You can do it. Take another one in. Let it out. That’s better. Do it again. Understand me? I am not going to let you pass out.”
She needed this. That utter intensity. The confidence. He wasn’t going to let her fall.
“Now again. In. Out.”
She managed to take a deeper breath.
“That’s it. Follow my breaths. In. Hold. Out.” He let go of her hands and took one, placing it on his chest. “In. Hold. Out. That’s it. That’s my good girl.” Then he winced. “Fuck, I didn’t mean to say that.”
He didn’t?
Why? Because he didn’t think she was a good girl?
More like he doesn’t want you to freak out at those words.
Considering that she’d just had a huge freak out, she couldn’t blame him for that.
“Let’s sit you up.” He switched on the bedside lamp by her bed, and she winced at its sharp light. “Sorry, baby. But I want to check the scratches on your neck.”
“Shit. I hate when I scratch up my neck,” she muttered, not thinking.
Then she realized that he’d frozen, and glanced over at him.
“That’s happened before?” he whispered.
“Um, yeah. A few times after it happened.”
“Motherfucker.” His jaw was tight. Fury radiated from him.
“But not in ages.” Ever since she’d learned that he’d been arrested. Or she hoped he had.
She started shaking. Crap. Shit.
“Baby, I’m going to hold you now, okay?”
She nodded, wondering why the heck he was even telling her.
Hold me. Please.
Then she was in his lap with his arms around her. But they weren’t tight enough. She needed to feel more secure.
“Tighter,” she urged.
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t. I know you won’t. And I know if I tell you to ease up, you will. Please. Please. Please.”
“Shh. You don’t have to beg. I’m here.” He held her until the shaking stopped. “Will you be all right while I go get the First-Aid kit?”
A whimper escaped her and she held on to him, shaking her head. “No. I don’t need the First-Aid kit.”
“Yes, you do. But you can come with me.” He stood with her cradled against his chest. Whoa.
“So strong.”
“Baby, you barely weigh anything at all. Is your kit in the bathroom?”
“Yes.” She directed him where to find it, and he grabbed it before setting her on the counter.
She wanted to protest, to grab hold of him, but she was trying to be brave.
Even though she didn’t feel brave at all.
He opened the kit. “Shit, darlin’. Where’s the rest of it?”
“What?”
“We have a First-Aid kit in nearly every room at the ranch and they’re all about twice the size of this one.”
“Really?”
“We hurt ourselves a lot.”
She bet. She knew how much they came into the clinic with injuries.
He cleaned up the scratches and put disinfectant on them. That was more than she would have done herself.
“You need to pee, darlin’?”
She shook her head, feeling her face grow warm.
“All right, then. Let’s get you back to bed.” He lifted her down, but her legs started buckling. “Whoa, darlin’.”
“Seems I’m falling for you again,” she joked.
Well, it was sort of a joke. Since she’d already fallen for him. In fact, she was all the way there.
Raid was it for her. He always had been. Always would be.
He carried her back to the bed and went to lay her down, but Hannah latched onto him without thought, wrapping herself around him.
“Uh, baby?”
“Yes?” she asked.
“You want to let go of me so I can put you back to bed?”
“No.”
“No?” he repeated.
“I don’t want to sleep alone,” she confessed.
He froze and then lifted her so they were face-to-face. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Please. I can’t . . . I can’t sleep alone.”
“It won’t scare you more?”
She gave him a shocked look. “Raid, you only ever make me feel safe.”
There was a conflicted look on his face that she didn’t really understand. Then he nodded and put her down. This time, she let go.
“Scoot over.”
“Oh, but this is my side.”
“Not while I’m in the bed. I’m on the side closest to the door.”
Wow, that was old-fashioned and over-protective. And she kind of loved it.
So she gave up her side of the bed and lay there as he took care of turning off the light and climbed in. They both lay there.
She was on her back, staring at the ceiling. Why wasn’t he touching her?
Maybe because you forced him to sleep in the same bed as you.
Shit. Shit.
A tremble ran through her that she couldn’t suppress.
