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Rats.
She tried to stop them, but she couldn’t. Another one ran through her. It was so hard that there was no way he couldn’t have felt the bed shake.
“Are you cold, baby?”
“No.”
There was a beat of silence.
“Scared? You want me to get out?” He rolled to the side of the bed, but she reached out and grabbed him without thought.
“No! Please!”
“Okay. It’s all right. I’m here. How about instead of me trying to guess, you tell me what you need?”
You can do this, Hannah.
“Will you . . . if it’s not too much trouble . . . could you, maybe, hold me?”
Far out. That took a bit to get out.
“Course I will, darlin’. Come snuggle into me.”
She rolled into him so fast that she hit her nose on his bicep.
“Ouch.” What an idiot.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“Yeah, just clumsy.” She thought she’d gotten over being clumsy around him . . . it seemed not.
“Darlin’,” he murmured with amusement in his voice.
She sighed, and he moved his arm, wrapping it around her as she rested her face on his chest.
This was safety. This was perfect.
29
“I don’t think I can do this.” She put her hand on her stomach as it jumbled with nerves.
Raid had just called Jake, who said he’d meet them at his office in forty minutes. Hannah had already called the clinic to let them know she’d be late for work.
“I’ll be with you the whole time,” he told her. “Unless you’d rather be on your own?”
She shook her head frantically. Why would he even think that? He was still acting kind of odd, but she didn’t have the capacity to think about Raid right now.
She was too busy freaking out.
“I want you there. I can’t do it without you.”
His face softened as he dished up some scrambled eggs onto two plates. Shoot. That looked good, but she felt too ill to eat.
“All right, baby. You just tell me whatever you need.”
She didn’t know what she needed, though. A cuddle? A shot of brandy? Some Xanax?
Raid’s phone beeped, and she jumped.
“Whoa, darlin’. Is this too much for you?” He gave her a worried look.
“No. I can do this . . . we need to know.”
“I can talk to Jake without you.”
“Won’t he want to hear it from me?”
“Eventually, yes. But he could look into this guy without talking to you. I can probably look into it myself.”
“No, you shouldn’t!”
“My cousin, Regent, will know someone who can do it quietly.”
“No, I think we should go to Jake. I should have told him in the first place.”
“All right, but if I think you’re getting too stressed, I’m pulling the plug on this. Understand?”
She nodded, knowing that was his serious voice.
“Shit,” he muttered, glancing down at his phone.
“What is it?” she asked worriedly. She wasn’t sure she could handle much more going wrong.
“Mia wants you to come for Sunday lunch.”
Why did he make that sound like it was the end of the world?
Oh God, maybe because he doesn’t want you there?
“And you don’t want me to go?” There was something going on with him. Something she couldn’t put her finger on.
His head shot up, and he gave her a fierce look. “Of course I want you to go. Why wouldn’t I?”
“I don’t know . . . you didn’t sound like you wanted to take me.”
“It’s my family.”
“Um, what?”
“They’ll all be there. We try to have lunch together every Sunday.”
That was so sweet.
She couldn’t imagine having such a big family. It had been her and grandma for so long.
“Not all of us can make it all the time, but they’ll all be there if they learn you’re coming.”
“To make sure I’m good enough for you?” Sure, she knew them all. Some better than others. But it was a different thing when she was seeing Raid. Right?
“Fuck, no. If anything, it will be the other way around.”
“What?” she asked, confused.
“I don’t want them to overwhelm you, baby. They’re a lot.”
“I’ve met them all before, you know. And I won’t be overwhelmed.”
Okay, that might be a lie. There were a lot of them and all of them had big personalities. But it also sounded like fun. A big family lunch together.
He shot her a look.
“I want to go. It will give me something to look forward to.”
“I’ll take you away on holiday. To the beach. Me, you, the sand and surf. That’s something to look forward to. Not lunch with those crazies.”
“Aren’t you one of the crazies?” she teased.
He snorted. “I guess.”
“It will be all right. If you really do want to take me. If you don’t feel like we’re at that stage and would rather go alone, that’s fine too.”
He stared at her for so long that she wondered if she had something on her face. She rubbed at her mouth, then her cheeks.
