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“You’re lucky you’re not fucking dead! You stupid, selfish, son of a bitch! Levi wasn’t enough of a fucking wake-up call? You want to end up just like him? Huh?! Keep going the way you’re going because next time no one will be here to save your sorry ass! You fucking asshole! I willneverforgive you for this!”
Misha’s arms tightened around my torso, holding onto me in the midst of my fucking meltdown. By the time I was done, my throat was raw and my shoulders buckled under the weight of emotions I didn’t even want to name, let alone think about. I sagged in Misha’s arms, kicking myself for losing it in front of him like a psycho.
“I’ll take care of it. I promise,” Misha murmured, his mouth at my ear. “Go downstairs.”
As soon as he loosened his hold, I spun on him, glaring up into his infuriatingly calm face, but it was hard to be mad when he radiated such quiet strength. Despite how furious I was, I knew it wasn’t at Misha. Definitely not at Misha. Biting back whatever retort was trying to form in my brain, I clenched my teeth and nodded, trudging down the stairs.
Surprisingly, Anton was in the living room with Bri and Ezra, handing them each a glass of milk to go with a plate of crackers smeared with peanut butter. It was bad enough that they heard all of that, but Anton had too?Fuck…If I wasn’t so livid, I might have been embarrassed.
“Is he dead?” Ezra squeaked, tears streaming down his red cheeks.
“No, buddy. No.” I knelt on the floor between my siblings, wrapping an arm around each of their necks and pulling them in close. “He’s ok. Everything’s going to be ok.”
“You’re such a liar,” Bri said, shoving my arm off and jumping to her feet. I stood with her, taking a step back when she whirled on me. “Everything isnotok! I can’t even call an ambulance when we need one! How is that ok, Marek? If I call for help, they’ll send the cops and they’ll take us away again! But that doesn’t matter to you because you got out! You got out and you left us here! Now Axel is leaving us too!”
“I didn’t leave you, Bri! Crystal fucking threw me out! Ok? That’s the truth! I didn’t skip out when I turned sixteen because I fucking felt like it! She had her boyfriend of the month throw me down those stairs with a bag of my shit and told me never to come back.
“And in case you haven’t been paying attention, I’m doing everything I can for the three of you! I know it doesn’t look like it to a twelve-year-old, but goddamn it! Cut me some fucking slack! I amnotyour fucking parent! I could be long gone, away from this whole goddamn place! But I’mhere! I am killing myself trying to take care of you!”
Tears cascaded down her face and she threw herself at me. Instead of hitting me, like I expected, she wrapped her arms around my waist and sobbed into my shirt. Sheshould havehit me. I was officially the biggest asshole in the world for screaming at her, like any of this was her fault. She was just a toddler when I got kicked out. Growing up, she obviously knew Crystal and I didn’t get along but she didn’t know the details. I didn’twanther to know. I didn’t want to crush any sense of hope she might have had before it could even form.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, hugging her tightly while guilt and shame ate me alive. “I’m sorry, Bri. I shouldn’t have said any of that. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
Ezra hugged my side with one arm, wrapping the other around Bri and patting her back gently.
Heavy footsteps on the stairs drew my attention that way and I was grateful for the distraction.
Anton was back, hauling Axel with him even though the asshole could barely stand.
“Where are you taking him?” I asked.
“To the hospital,” Anton replied.
“I’m fine, man,” Axel mumbled, his chin bobbing against his chest. “I just wanna sleep.”
“You can’t take him to the hospital,” I said, disentangling myself from the kids and stepping in front of Anton, as if I could actually stop him from leaving. He might have been my height, but from the way he carted my brother around, he’d have no problem laying me out.
“Misha said he’s going,” Anton replied with a bored tone. To him, the matter was settled.
“I don’t give a fuckwhatMisha said. He’snotgoing to a hospital!”
Speaking of the well-dressed devil… Misha appeared on the stairs, medical bag in hand. “He needs to go, Marek. If he goes under again, he’ll need a recovery dose of naloxone, which we do not have. Plus someone needs to monitor his airways for the rest of the night.”
I closed the distance on Misha, growling out the rest of my protest under my breath so the kids couldn’t hear, even though Bri already knew what was up. “I can’t afford a hospital. And once they find out he’s a minor, they’re going to call the cops who are going to turn around and call DCFS. They’ll put them in foster care again and I can’t let that happen. Iwon’tlet that happen.”
Misha laid a hand on my shoulder, lowering his face toward mine. “Let me worry about all of that, hmm?”
I shook my head. “No. You’ve done enough.”
His fingers tightened, almost to the point of being painful and his voice dropped even lower. “I insist he goes to a hospital and I am not going to argue with you about it. Now go pack some things for the children. We’re taking them with us.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Where am I going to go with them? You’ve seen my place. There’snoway I’m taking them there.”
“It’s already taken care of. Please, stop arguing and go. I’ll be waiting outside.” He didn’t leave any roomtokeep arguing, since he gave my shoulder one last, pointed squeeze and sidestepped me, speaking to Anton in Russian.
I ran a hand over the back of my head and turned, looking at Bri and Ezra. “Hey guys, why don’t you go throw some stuff in a bag? We’re going to hang out for a couple of days.”
“You mean like a sleepover?” Ezra asked, his eyes widening.
