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“I’ll walk you out,” Axel said, following me out of the kitchen.
I glanced around the living room on my way to the door. Ripped and broken furniture, dirty carpet with cigarette burns and more stains than I could count, and shitty patch jobs in the drywall. Home sweet fucking home. “I think you’re getting better at that,” I said, nodding toward one of the fresher patches of drywall mud.
“Yeah. Thanks. YouTube videos.” He shoved his hands in his pockets, looking up at me. Pretty soon he’d be as tall as me, if the malnutrition hadn’t fucked him up too much already. “Ezra’s teacher said we need to take him to an eye doctor. Thinks he needs glasses since he failed some vision test thing they do every year.”
I sighed, mentally tallying how muchthatwas going to cost. “Yeah. Ok. I’ll work on it.”
“And Bri’s got that field trip coming up. The school needs the full payment. Plus, you know she’ll need money the day of for food and shit.”
Every word out of his mouth stacked another ten pounds of worry onto my back. “Jesus Christ. Anything else?”
He bit his lips and looked away.
“What?” I snapped. I didn’t have time to dance around the subject. After a three-day dry spell, a client finally reached out. I couldn’t skip our appointment. Not now when I had mold removal and doctors and field trips to finance.
“That social worker was here the other day.” Axel’s gaze slid back to me. He was trying to be strong but the quiver in his jaw gave him away.
“Fuck!” I ran my hand over the back of my head, reprioritizing everything he’d just told me in preparation for a whole new set of hoops to jump through. “What did she want?”
“Same bullshit. Someone called them. Doing a welfare check. Blah blah blah.”
“And?”
“And what? Our whoring mother wasn’t home so it’s not like the woman could do her stupid investigation. Not that it does any good… I’mnotgoing back to foster care, Marek. None of us are! We already agreed.”
My gaze whipped toward him again and my jaw clenched. “I know! I’mtrying, ok?”
“Well fucking try harder!
“Would you keep your goddamn voice down? I don’t want the kids hearing and getting their hopes up!” I shot a cautious glance toward the kitchen. Thankfully the sound of Bri and Ezra playing tic-tac-toe continued, uninterrupted.
“If you petition the court, I’m old enough to choose to go with you,” Axel said, taking a step closer and lowering his voice. “Brianna is close enough. And Ezra will go wherever the rest of us do. They wouldn’t split us up again. Theycan’t.” I could sense his eagerness in equal measure with my rising desperation. It gutted me I didn’t have the same optimism. Not anymore.
“You know no judge is going to give me custody, Ax. I don’t have my own place. I don’t have a car. I don’t even have a fucking job right now.”
He reared back like I hit him. “What?! What happened to the fancy bar?”
“Nothing. It’s a minor setback. But things will be alright as soon as I get some steady income again.”
Defeat rounded his thin shoulders. “Whatever, man.”
“Ax…” Fucking typical. Being honest only led to regrets, which is why I should have stuck with lies. They were easier for everyone to swallow.
He shook his head and walked away.
As much as it killed me, I resisted the urge to go after him and yanked open the front door. Stepping outside, I checked the time on my phone and swore. I didn’t have time to wait for the next bus, which meant I’d have to pay for another fucking Uber to make it back to my place so I wasn’t late for the stupid town car.
While I waited for my ride to show, a text came through, practically slapping me in the face with my responsibilities.
G: Can’t wait to see you.
I groaned but typed back:Looking forward to it.
The great thing about texting was that people couldn’t detect the lie as easily. With enough experience, I’d been able to perfect the habit in real life, too. Too bad you couldn’t put that shit on a resume.
Thankfully, the Uber got me back to my apartment with enough time to shower, change, and make it downstairs where the town car was already waiting.
Before we got to the hotel, I pulled a small vial out of my pocket and squeezed a couple of drops of the clear liquid into my mouth. Grimacing against the sudden surge of saltiness, I swallowed it nonetheless.
