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I slide my hands up his back, stripping him bare. Yet somehow, I’m the one who feels exposed as I take in more of his naked skin. He’s just as nice to look at with his clothes off. By now I know better than to expect a rush of libidinous longing at the sight. But the way he smiles at me sends warmth rushing through me anyway.
Nick draws me in for another lingering kiss as he helps me out of my clothes. We fit together. He brings the spark of romance I’ve been longing for into my life. We undress each other between more tender kisses that make me feel cherished. My mirror is covered in a sheen of fog by the time we step into the shower together.
“Can I soap you up?” Nick asks, looking between me and my wash cloth.
I swallow hard at the intimacy of that gesture, and then nod, trusting him with a level of closeness I’ve only ever shared with Saint before. “Yeah.”
Nick understands my boundaries. I trust him not to push past them. His hands are gentle as he rubs suds into my skin. His touches transcend anything sexual. It’s like he’s distilled down the essence of what it is to care about another person and is pouring it over me along with my body wash.
When he gets to my dick, he pauses, meeting my gaze with a question in his warm eyes. I take his hand and guide the warm slippery cloth over myself, body responding to the friction and heart full of love for this perfect man.
Nick’s breath hitches when I move into the touch, pulling him closer. I want to delight in every part of him, the same way his every touch shows how much he adores me. He follows my lead as I pull him close.
I realize that he’s aroused too, our erections bumping awkwardly together. “Is this okay?” I whisper. I get the impression Nick would agree that checking in is sexy.
“Yeah. I’m um… Well, you can see it.” We both look down, and then he returns to my eyes. “I’m happy for this to go anywhere you want it to. We can just get clean, or we can see where this goes.”
I run my hands down his chest, enjoying the closeness. The way his eyes never stray from mine, letting me see how he’s leaving all his stress behind and committing himself to me again.
With adoration in my heart, I wrap my hand around us both. It’s lazy and close. Like cuddling but a little more. Nick kisses and holds me as making out under the warm spray of the shower leads to making love. The sound of him coming with my name on his lips is as sweet as the cookies we made together. Nick keeps holding me as I follow him a few moments later. I can see myself building forever with this man in my arms.
“Mm, that was nice,” Nick kisses my neck as he reaches for the forgotten washcloth..
“Yeah,” I agree, still a little punchdrunk from coming.
“Want to help me clean up?” Nick offers me the washcloth. I try to be as tender soaping him up as he was with me. We finish getting clean and turn off the water. I dig out fresh, fluffy towels for us both.
“Was that alright?” Nick asks. “Not too much?”
Yeah, checking in is nice, and getting that from him warms me almost as much as the hot shower. “Just the right amount. Like the massage just kept going, but it was still romantic. And, added bonus, not too much clean up.”
Nick chuckles. “It was good for me, too. Relaxing instead of stressful.”
I nod in agreement. “I think we could do this again. And other things. Not, like, soon, but sometimes?”
I smile hopefully at Nick, and he beams back at me. I’m so warm and loose in the steamy confines of the bathroom. There’s something so intimate about sharing this space that’s usually so intensely personal with him that makes it easier to discuss other personal matters.
“That sounds good. It’s really nice to know I don’t have to justify why I’m not into sex all the time with you. I didn’t realize how much that usually stressed me out with past relationships,” he confides, and I could used to being the one he bares his heart with.
“Same,” I chuckle. The relief of that basic compatibility is a palpable burden off my shoulders. That leaves only one major hurdle to building my happily ever after with Nick. He already said he’s ready to embrace Saint’s place in my life, but I just need to hear the words again. That I can love them both is music in my ears. I need him to confirm I wasn’t just hearing what I wanted when we were talking in my bed.
“And speaking of exes, are youreallyokay having Christmas brunch with Saint?”
“Yeah. More than okay. This is the start of our own family traditions, right? He’s more than your ex. I can’t claim to have a similar experience, but Saint and I have loving you in common. We’ll figure out where we both stand with each other and make it work.”
It’s a thrill to hear him just casually remind me I’m loved. I’ve fallen so hard for this man in front of me. This time when he says he’s more than fine with Saint and me, I decide to believe him. I lean into the giddy euphoria of being able to have it all.
We get dressed and go over to Saint’s together, foregoing coats and scurrying across our shared porch.
I’m surprised to see Angel at the door wearing Saints pajamas. Normally, Saint would mention having a guest over. In fact, bringing Angel into our Christmas celebrations seems like a big deal. Maybe not the same as Nick joining me, but Saint doesn’t do relationships or romance. Our holiday traditions are usually just ours. Well, mostly mine with Saint joining in and humoring what a giant dork I am about bringing the holiday magic, but still… This is big.
He could just be giving Angel somewhere to go for the holiday, but I get the sense that there’s something a little more going on. I give him an inquisitive look, but he acts baffled. Idiot. Maybe he doesn’t see it, or he’s just not ready to share what’s between them. That’s fine. I’ll be here for him whenever he’s ready, just like he was there for me.
I get to spend the afternoon with people who make me smile until my cheeks hurt. New love and old, sharing a table as Nick falls into easy conversation with Saint. I take the time to get to know Angel, a true sweetheart who seems to be increasingly important in my best friend’s life. Our lives might be changing, but I know our love will endure.
I joke that this is our first annual family holiday brunch. Saint kisses my cheek and hugs my boyfriend when we leave to go to Tina’s house. We wish Saint and Angel a Merry Christmas while I nurture the hope that the four of us can share many more brunches like this in the coming years.
Chapter 17
