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However, I’m far from done. His words replay in my mind, over and over, slicing into my very soul. They’re death by a thousand cuts, each one an accusation that’s true. I never asked Rowan why he did what he did, because his side didn’t matter to me. It’s also true I wouldn’t have believed him. My anger was too intense, my reality too distorted. And Idideagerly hand him over.
What’s not true is that I didn’t love him. It’s that I loved him with the passion of an eighteen-year-old girl who couldn’t get over the loss. I still love him.
Wherever you go, I’ll follow,the voice repeats my words. Get him back for me. For us.
I take the fractured butterfly pieces from my pocket and hold them tightly in my palm. The sharp edges pierce my skin, but I bear the much-deserved pain.
Tears fill my eyes and roll down my face when I blink. Through the tightness in my throat, I say, “Phil, are there any more of Rowan’s men alive?”
“I’m the only one. Axle got to me before Declan could. He was sly.”
“I need you to take me to my father,” I say.
“He’ll kill us the second he learns about what happened. If he hasn’t already.”
“Then drop me off somewhere and I’ll get a ride.” I wipe my tears and inhale deeply. “If there’s a chance Rowan is still alive, I have to take it. And no offense, but to get to Gideon Black, I’ll need someone in power.”
“You know how to get in touch with him?”
I nod. “Declan didn’t think I’d be talking much, so he told me things. Including where he met Mr. Black.”
Phil flicks his gaze to me again through the mirror. “In that case, I’ll take you to your father. But if they shoot me, I’ll haunt you. You comin’, Axe?”
Axle sighs. “I swore to protect her. I have no choice.”
Bringing the bloodied colored glass to my lips, I kiss it. “I’ll make this right again. I promise.”
You better.
21
LOUISA
The ticking of the clock above the fireplace is the only sound in the study. I’m standing by the window, holding an ice pack to my brow. Mom is by my side, while Art remains silent, throwing daggers my way across the room.
My father sits behind his desk, his narrowed eyes darkening more and more as he processes what I’ve told him.
Mom squeezes my hand, the one that’s not been bandaged, passing some of her strength on to me.
“Say something,” I tell him, anxious and also aware that every second that passes is critical.
Papá steeples his fingers beneath his chin and his eyes go to mere slits. “What would you like me to say, Louisa? That I’m all right with the fact that jou tried to get married behind my back? Or that I’m proud that jou are doing business on jour own, also behind my back? How about the fact that no one bothered to tell me this marriage was a sham the entire time? I don’t suffer fools gladly, and yet my own daughter has made one out of me.”
“You’re disappointed.”
“Of course he is!” Art chimes in. “You’ve fucked up one too many times and you expect us to come running to your boyfriend’s rescue now.”
“He’s my husband.” I hiss, literally making the sound when he comes close to where I’m standing. “And I’m aware I fucked up. I don’t need your affirmation on that matter.”
“Kids, this isn’t the time to fight.” Mom leaves my side to sit across from my father. “Fernando—” she starts but is cut off by his glare.
“And jou knew about this all along.” He pounds a fist against the desk and looks away from her as if he can’t stand the sight. “Jou kept this from me.”
“Because I knew you’d react this way. You wouldn’t have allowed it.”
“He’s the enemy!”
“It was love! You remember that, don’t you? Love? It makes you do crazy things like running away with Manny’s fiancé. You risked it all for me.” She sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I wanted that for her.”
