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“What are you on about?”
Boy, she really doesn’t know?A popular porn site had come to their campus to “cast” unknown co-eds, and Paige had almost been roped into it before she figured out what was going on.A lot of Sybians. So many Sybians in the warehouse across from the brand-new science building.Paige had broken up with her girlfriend at the time because the “loose and carefree” sophomore from a popular sorority insisted on “taking the opportunity” to have fun in a porn video, and for some reason, Paige wasn’t into it.
“The therapist is a quack,” Paige said. “She probably wants us making sex tapes, too.”
“You know… none of that is so strange. Our friends do shit like that all the time. They’re all members of that club downtown. The kinky one.”
“First of all, they’reyourfriends. My friends aren’t sexual deviants. Not that I have a problem with deviants.”
Rhea rolled her eyes. “What friends?”
Paige curtailed a gasp. “Ones from work!”
“You mean all the gay guys and straight girls? They’re hitting up Hellfire? Wait a minute, don’t tell me. I don’t wanna know.”
“You think we’re too good for that place, or something?”
“Or something! More like you’d die within five minutes there. You know, for being a big ol’ slut in college, you sure are a prude now?”
“I’m sorry, did you marry me hoping I’d stay a slut?”
Water splashed in the tub as Rhea held up her thumb and forefinger. “A little. You know I love sluts. Especially freaky sluts who can’t keep their boobs in their tops.”
This time, Paige couldn’t hold back her scandalized gasp. “That wasone time!” Rhea must have meant the frat party where Paige got so drunk she not only participated in a wet T-shirt contest but went completely topless after she won. It took the power of her two best gal pals to ensure her safety when surrounded by more twenty-something guys than Paige wanted to ever think about again. It wasn’t until a few years into their relationship that Paige discovered her future wife had been at the party too.Saw my breasts long before we started dating.So much for that mystery. Or was that what made Rhea decide to start dating the big heartbreaker on campus?I broke more than hearts…Legend said that one of her girlfriends still didn’t walk quite right.
“What are you thinking about?” Rhea leaned over the edge of the tub, arms crossed beneath her chin. “It’s probably not me touching myself. I know that doesn’t do it for you.”
Paige scoffed. “Don’t self-deprecate yourself like that. You’re hot.”
“Am I?” Rhea cocked her head. When the water flattened her short hair like that, she was so boyishly – yetgirlishly– attractive that Paige remembered the first time they finally made love.I put it off for so long because I didn’t want another casual relationship. I wanted something real. Something that wasn’t built on sex.The wait had been worth it. From then on, that was Paige’s consideration on the matter. If the sex was worth it? They could wait.
Perhaps she had been a bit too extreme with that…
“Yes. You’re hot.” Paige’s arms remained crossed as she stepped forward and bent her mouth toward her wife’s. “I always stare at you when you’re naked, you know.”
Their lips gently touched. Rhea pulled away before Paige could go after more.
“I stared at you sooo much at that frat party.”
Paige stood up while her wife cracked herself up with such witty observations. “Perv.”
“My goal from that night on,” Rhea continued, while Paige tackled the toothbrush and paste on the bathroom counter, “was to find out what it was like to shove my face in your boobs while pounding you senseless between the legs.”
A slight tingle appeared in that spot right now, but it wasn’t enough for Paige to run to bed with it. “That so?” she asked, bamboo toothbrush in her mouth.
“Yup. When we finally hit the sack afterweeksof dating, I thought I was gonna die.”
Paige began brushing. “Did your dreams come true?”
“You really have no idea. I’m still riding that high after nearly fifteen years.”
Paige glanced over her shoulder. Rhea beamed back at her, arms slung over the back of the tub while her shit-eating grin lit up the whole bathroom.
It should have been a sweet moment that only reaffirmed their love for one another. After all, Paige loved the “little moments” that she sometimes lost living in a county like Los Angeles and having a career that catered to some of the most superficial people around. As she spat out her toothpaste, though, she only felt one thing – and it wasn’t relief. It was the gnawing sensation that constantly chipped away at her heart after years of kissing the same woman every day.
Guilt.
Chapter 6
