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“God, that sucks.” He blows out a breath. “My mom had been in the hospital for a week. My dad, sister, and I were all with her when she finally passed. My dad was a wreck and my sister curled up in a chair and sobbed. I just sat there holding my mom’s hand—I didn’t cry, didn’t scream. I didn’t feel much of anything, really.”
We were both quiet for a minute and then I looked back at him. “This sucks.”
He let out a huff of a laugh and I cracked a smile.
“It does suck,” he agrees. “I’m Wyatt.”
“Nice to meet you, Wyatt. I’m Lucy.”
He extends his hand and I shake it, offering him a small smile. He smiles back and slowly sticks his hand back in the pocket of his jacket.
“I should probably head back to my house, but thank you.”
Wyatt cocks his head to the side and furrows his brows together, “For what?”
I shrug. “For listening, and for not trying to make it better. For just…understanding.”
“You’re welcome.” He smiles—a real smile that makes his eyes crinkle a little at the corner. “Hey, if you ever need someone to listen, I come out here most Saturdays.”
“Thanks, maybe I’ll see you around.”
He nods and I start to walk back up the hill.
“Lucy?” He calls out.
“Yeah?”
“It’ll always suck, but it will eventually start to suck less.”
I smile a little. “Thanks.”
“Bye, Lucy.”
“Bye, Wyatt.”
I walk back up the hill and call my best friend, Allie. She picks up on the second ring, something she’s started doing since my dad died. Before, she never used to answer her phone.
“Lucy, where are you? Your mom is a little worried, but she’s trying to be calm because your house is freaking packed with people right now.”
“I’m still at the cemetery, I just needed a minute. Can you come pick me up?”
“I’m on my way out the door now, give me ten minutes.”
“Thanks, Allie.”
I hang up and walk over to my dad’s grave. As the snow begins to fall, I feel the tears prick at my eyes.
“God, you really would’ve hated this,” I whisper. “I don’t remember a time you didn’t complain about the first snow.”
I stare at the grave and my heart clenches in my chest. Part of me wants to scream and cry, but most of me is just numb. I feel the tears roll down my cheeks, but I don’t wipe them away, they’re proof that I’m feeling something. I take a few deep breaths and look away from the grave.
He will never see me graduate.
He will never meet the man I marry.
He will never walk me down the aisle.
He will never meet his grandchildren.
