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I sat, staring at Stephen and holding his hand as we jolted around in the air in the way only helicopters could jostle. Michael’s colleague and likely best friend passed out when we were in the air about twenty minutes. I didn’t know what to do. I’d never been so terrified a person was going to die before…
Except when Michael had been shot.
And Hope. She nearly died.
And Layla.
Okay, a lot of people had nearly died lately, and I wasn’t sure how much trauma I could hold.
I killed Tito.The whole scene replayed over and over again in my mind. Every gory and gruesome detail. I fought off another wave of dizziness and realized I almost hyperventilated. I needed to breathe slower. Soon after, we were on the ground and they rushed Stephen past me. I spun to watch him vanish behind the whoosh of the automatic doors. Then I noticed my reflection in the glass.
Suddenly, the horror of the look on the one nurse’s face…made sense.
I sank into a chair. My legs were too weak to carry me any further. I texted my sisters.Michael is fine. Something bad happened. His friend is shot. Maybe dying. And I had to kill someone. Can’t think. Text later.
They didn’t love to be told to leave things alone. My lips almost curled into a smile. I wondered if they would, in this instance.
Michael appeared and I rose. We stared at each other, and I wondered what his solemn, steady eyes saw in mine.
He said, “Oh, what the fuck. Where is the nurse? Why aren’t they treating you?”
His frantic tone broke through the haze, so I lifted a hand to reach for him. “None of it is mine. I’m not hurt. Not at all. I’m perfectly fine.”
He took my shoulders in his gentle hands, but I pulled back before he could hug me. “You don’t want this on you. It’s really bad. You just—don’t.” Was that my voice that wavered? I pulled it together, straightening my shoulders.Maybe I can have a meltdown later but not now.“They just took Stephen back.”
Instead of the hug, Michael cupped the side of my face. “Tell me what happened. Every detail.”
So I did. Every single detail. He never looked away, not once the whole time I talked. “Thank fuck I left that armoire unlocked. What did you say he said? Thatthe boss said you had to die.When did the Russians turn him? He was never eveninRussia.” He stepped away from me. “I’m so sorry, Bridget. I told you to trust me and look what happened.Don’ttrust me. I obviously don’t know what I’m doing.” He stepped away from me and shouted at the top of his lungs toward the ceiling. “If I can’t keep you safe from the people I leave in the house to protect you, then what the fuck am even I doing?”
“Boss?” Roy stepped into the hallway. “How do you want to handle this?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “Take her to a hotel nearby. Send cleaners to both locations. Tito is dead, and the Russians are gone. I’d like to assume she is safe, but until we interview every single person who works for me... I’m going to check on Stephen then I’ll meet you there. Don’t leave there until I arrive, Bridget. I only fucking trust you, Roy.Onlyyou. Do you understand?”
“You know I’d walk through fire for you. Always have, always would. Stephen would, too. He’s going to make it. I know he will, so don’t worry too hard about that. It would piss him off to know he worried you. I’ll get everything taken care of, and I’ll take your girl to the hotel. Easy.” Roy put out his hand. “Come on, Bridget. Let’s get you somewhere to clean up. Afterward, you can get some rest while we wait for Michael.”
I doubted I would rest. Maybe ever again.
The shower rinsed the filth away, but I continued to stand under the spray long after it was necessary. The door to the hotel room opened and closed. Michael, I hoped. Or someone else coming to kill me. Although I doubted I would face more double agents. Tito betrayed Michael, but I had a hard time believing others would. They loved him.
The bathroom door flung open then Michael was under the spray with me. He stripped in the water, despite being wet, and threw the clothes aside. I was quickly pressed up against the wall. I should’ve reminded him about his shoulder, but right then I couldn’t think. I could only feel.
He lifted me up and pushed himself inside of me fast. My legs curled around him, gripping him, pulling him closer as if I could drag myself into him and hide.
“You’re okay.” He said it over and over again. He kept saying it when his hips started to shift, then bump…and whispered it again as he fucked me against the wall of that shower. It was as though he had to remind himself with each thrust, or he pushed the words inside me with his length. I felt more than okay, but as pleasure built, I also wasn’t. Tears streamed out of my eyes, and I sobbed even as I bucked into him. He kissed the tears away, the spray coating both of us in warm water as he continued his litany. “You’re okay.”
Finally, I came around him on a long sigh, but he wasn’t nearly done. Minutes passed before he finished, his fingertips gripping into my hips as he cried out a primal roar. I loved being that close to him, despite knowing I wouldn’t be able to come again. As his body trembled with the last echoes of his orgasm, we held each other against the wall as the water beat down on us.
“You had to kill him,” he whispered.
That was true. I sniffled a little anyway. “I did.”
He continued, his slow steady voice like a rock I could cling to in the storm of my guilt. “It’s going to haunt you, and I’m so sorry for that. You’re not meant for killing. But I need you to remember—he was going to kill you. You did exactly the right thing. This will never see the police, this will never be in front of a judge, but no one would convict you. This is the literal definition of self-defense.”
I sniffled again, but I lifted my chin with sass. “I don’t care. Right now, I don’t care that I killed him, Michael. Does that make me a sociopath? Can you finally see how much like my father I really am?”
“I can see very clearly…that you’re in shock. Sociopaths don’t wonder whether or not they’re sociopaths. Again, it’s against the literal definition.” He kissed me again, a punctuation for the tease in his tone. “I’m going to wrap you in the scratchy sheets, and then I’m going to watch you sleep for a while, Bridget. Then I’m going to leave you, because I need to sit in the hospital near Stephen. That’s what I do when people I care about are in the hospital. I won’t be gone long, and Roy will come back and sit outside your door.”
I stroked my hands over his face. “Thank you for killing the Russians. It was really something to watch you in action.”
