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Breathing hard, I rested against the surface, my heart thundering a mile a minute. It was the longest one on one interaction I’d ever had with Kai, and it was safe to say that it affected me.
He knew my name! He knew that I had been at the fort for a while. He’d even talked to my supervisor about me! My curse was supposed to prevent him from being able to sense I was his fated mate, but clearly it hadn’t been able to completely block me from his perception.
I knew this was a bad thing, and I knew I probably should find a way to increase the power of my curse so all thoughts of me merely disappeared into nothingness, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I was losing the only connection I had to the man I longed for, and I was desperate to hold onto it, even if it was a paltry one.
Would it be so bad if I was just the tiniest bit selfish, just once? I wanted to think so. Granted, I was also definitely thinking with my lower half.
“Fuck…” I muttered to myself, my hands gliding down my body as if chasing the heat flowing through me. Because I did feel as if I was on fire, my blood rushing through my veins at an impossible speed.
My mind was just so full of Kai: his scent that floated over to me while we stood there in my secret spot, the moonlight that had reflected across his cheekbones and inside of those deep, dark eyes. They were the color of the deepest, most valuable earth, of life itself, promising me all sorts of things I couldn’t have.
It was all too much. Stripping out of my clothing, I headed to my bed, flopping onto it, and letting myself heave out a long, long sigh.
But this only fanned the flames, making me feel that much hotter. In fact, it was like I was burning up, consumed by the lust, attraction, and raw emotion Kai made me feel. My hands were spurred on by that inferno, continuing their journey down my now naked body.
Just like in the cafeteria, I slipped into a daydream of what it’d be like to feelhishands on me, if it were his calloused fingers trailing between my breasts or pushing down the waistband of my sleepwear.
Another jolt went through me when I realized that I'd been standing before my fated mate without any underwear on. Anyounce of control left in me sputtered and died as my fingers dove between my legs.
Usually I was too tired and too removed from my own feelings to really be in the mood to touch myself, but my interaction with Kai had awakened a desire in me that'd long since been dormant. A desire that wouldn’t be satiated until I did something about it.
A dark voice within me told me I should go right back into the wild and make him help me out with my little situation. That the constant uphill battle I was fighting against our fate was inhumane, and he needed to make it up to me. But as turned on as I was, I knew I couldn’t do such a thing, so instead, my fingers would have to do.
I slid against myself in the way I liked, closing my eyes, letting myself get lost in the fantasy. I could practically smell him there with me, his body radiating warmth into mine.
Would he be a gentle lover? Would he be wild and full of power like the alpha he was? I didn’t know, but I let myself play with both scenarios as my digits danced around my longing clit.
Back when I had more energy and amorous intent, I used to take my time with myself. To slowly wind myself up as I appreciated my body. I wasn’t a buxom barmaid, my cup didn’t overflow, but I still felt plenty beautiful, especially when my body was flushed from my own ministrations. As a nurse, however, I didn’t have the time or enthusiasm to let my orgasm rise and fall.
I felt it building far too soon, most likely brought on by my mind and senses still being full of Kai. I could see the quirk of his lips in my imagination as he saw me begin to writhe. My other hand slipped under my thin night dress to pinch my nipple.
God, I wished he was here. I wished his teeth were in my neck and that we were both giving ourselves over to the wildness of itall. But that could never be, so I'd just have to be content with my imagination.
Granted, content wasn’t exactly the right word as I felt my orgasm slam into me, powerful and heady. I arched off the bed, my fingers working overtime to ride me through the storm of sensation.
Oh, oh,oh!It was so good.Sogood. Better than it'd ever been on my own before, flooding me with a euphoria that was basically indescribable. It stole my breath—felt like it stole my verysoul.
When I finally came down from my temporary trip into my own personal Heaven, I was sweaty and breathing hard. But for a moment, just a moment, I didn’t feel quite so lonely. Warmed by the glow of it all, I let myself sink into slumber. The embers of the moment would probably burn out in my sleep, but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t enjoy it while it lasted.
Chapter 4
Kai
Perhaps I shouldn’t have followed the pretty witch from a distance, but I did want to make sure she returned to the base safely. I wasn’t kidding when I reminded her of protocol, so I’d been surprised when she’d talked back to me.
At the drop of a hat, the healer had gone from adorably flustered and sweet to colder than ice. I wondered if a deity or spirit possessed her. It wouldn’t be the first time it'd happened. Or maybe she had a split personality?
Of course, both of those assumptions were fairly impractical, but I couldn’t help that my mind was spinning in dozens of different directions, trying to figure out why that switch had flipped so abruptly.
I might have speculated that it was sheer embarrassment if it weren’t for the fact that Ayla was a medic. She was used to nudity, wasn’t she? By now, the earthly body must seem like a machine to her. Yet, she blushed. She blushed so brightly that the effect was luminescent in the evening light.
So many questions and uncertainties whirled around in my mind, and yet it was as though my left brain wanted to drown them out, like it didn’t want me to think too hard. Each time I felt like I’d pinned down a stray query, it would flit off and meldinto another. All I knew was that while I couldn't be entirely sure what exactly made her blush, I certainly did like it.
It was clichéd, but I found myself drawn to her contradictory responses. There was that beautiful blush, bright and maidenly in the moonlight, but then there was the request that I leave her to her own devices. Basically, “get lost”but said as politely as possible. I wasn't the type of guy to pursue a woman who said no or insist that she was just playing hard to get. No, I’d had to deal with far too many alphas who didn’t know the line between flirtation and a woman just wanting to live her life.
The medic’s body language and words were at perfect odds with one another. Perhaps she just meant that moment, that night, so that she could continue her work in peace? That she’d been flushed and happy to receive my attention before she remembered a deadline I didn’t know of? I’d heard about how hard she worked, and I could certainly appreciate a medic who prioritized her craft, especially since her potions were apparently quite affective for multiple subtypes of cryptid. Few things were more frustrating than taking a wounded soldier to the infirmary just for them to have no medicine, watching someone suffer while everyone else around them received care.
The plausible explanation satisfied my curiosity. At least… it did for a few minutes. But then I found myself inhaling, remembering her scent, wondering why on earth she smelled so… so…
