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“I’m happy,” Craig murmurs.
“Good. So am I,” he says and kisses Craig on the forehead.
Dr. Beck arrives in the morning. He takes saliva samples from both of them, and Sam is relaxed, so secure in his connection to Craig that he only growls once when the doctor first touches Craig.
They answer questions, then Dr. Beck leaves, and Sam takes Craig straight to bed, bending him over and spending a lot of time licking him until he’s open and dark pink with arousal.
Craig doesn’t come from it, but he makes a lot of sounds that indicate how much he likes it. And he doesn’t ask Sam to stop or try to get away. His breathing picks up, and he squirms back, wanting Sam deeper. Craig’s cock is hard, balls dark and full, but he never tries to touch himself, never tries to orgasm, and eventually, there comes a point where Craig can’t wait any longer, and he begs to be fucked.
“Was I good, Daddy?” Craig asks as Sam covers him with his body and starts to enter him.
“Of course you were. You are always so good to me, aren’t you?”
“I think so,” Craig says and offers his neck for a bite, wanting to be bitten and impaled at the same time, to feel utterly mastered by his Dominant.
Sam has never been with a submissive so willing to give himself over, who has so little struggle about surrendering. It’s beautiful. Something to be cherished and protected.
Maybe all submissives start out like this, but bad experiences with other Dominants make them hesitant, keep them from submitting as deeply and easily, and from going so far into a submissive state. If he wasn’t Craig’s first Dominant but his fourth or fifth, would Craig behave differently?
Or maybe it’s something about Sam, the submissives who typically choose him, the ones who only want a Dominant that won’t take advantage and push, who isn’t feral and won’t lose control.
Those submissives are wary and uncomfortable with their own needs, so it takes a lot longer for them to submit.
Or maybe it’s just Craig, that he really is this special and deeply submissive.
Craig doesn’t have to reconcile the needs of his body with a contrary mental view of himself. Craig thinks submission is beautiful, but there are a lot of submissives who don’t. They’re ashamed and embarrassed and think of it as a weakness. And there are a lot of Dominants who agree, and that has to affect a submissive’s willingness to be vulnerable again and again.
Sam hopes Craig gets to stay as he is and that life doesn’t batter this innocent part of him around. He hopes he can protect Craig, keep him safe and cherished, and treat him like he should be treated. Maybe it’s just his cycle (though he’s had enough that he doubts it), but he already can’t imagine letting Craig go when this is over.
No one can give Craig what he needs, not like Sam can. The only question is, does Craig feel the same way? When he’s just been reintegrated back into the world, is it fair for Sam to want him as his own without letting Craig experience other Dominants or what it’s like to live in this new time?
15
It’s exhausting, Craig realizes. His release cycle is more tiring than he ever imagined. His stomach is so sore that it hurts to sit up, turn over, or even laugh. His inner thighs are throbbing, as if all the clenching and milking has exhausted all of his muscles and radiated downward.
His taint aches from being rubbed and also from being swollen. His neck has been bitten again and again, and there are a series of dark bruises and small teeth marks along his neck and shoulders that Craig finds beautiful. He’ll find himself staring at them in the mirror for long minutes, losing time as he touches all the sore places, glorying in how good and right all of it is.
But all of that is nothing compared to how he feels inside.
Muscles he didn’t know he had are overworked from squeezing Sam’s knot again and again, getting his Dominant to come. And it’s not over yet. They’re not even at the halfway point. Excitement and something like fear slip through him as he tries to imagine how he’ll feel at the end of Sam’s cycle.
It isn’t fear, though. It might be anticipation, but it’s darker than that. It’s going to be a challenge. He’s gone into this cycle as one person, and he’ll come out as someone different.
He’ll know the bounds and limits of who he’s meant to be. At the end of this experience, he will know himself in a way he’s always dreamed of but been denied.
For so long, he’s defined himself as a desperate and unfulfilled submissive. Denied endlessly. Always alone.
Unworthy.
Those descriptions won’t apply to him anymore. He’ll finish this cycle, and no part of him will be untouched. He’ll be pushed to the edge of his endurance in every possible way and have to give more than he knew he could, and that’s exciting. He wants to give himself away, but he doesn’t even know how much he has to give.
That’s what this Dominant will give him. It’s a gift. Sam will use him and show him the boundaries of his own nature, push him to the limits of his endurance, and allow him to see what he needs and can take, what he really wants.
Sam will show him himself.
Craig loves it. He already craves more of it. He wishes his Dominant would be in his cycle permanently and that this mounting and breeding and knotting would never end. He didn’t think it would be so emotional. He cries and sobs constantly, aware he’ll likely be this way for the entire cycle. There’s just so much inside of him that needs to come out. So much frustration and isolation, denial and loss. So much fear and even anger at what they made him go through, that everyone kept this from him and told him it was wrong.
And then there’s the burgeoning love and incredible lust he feels for his Dominant, and that also expresses itself through tears. There’s the physical stimulation and pleasure, the sharpness and release of submission, the pleasure of orgasm—how could he not weep for all of it? How does anyone behave differently? It’s all so beautiful that it would seem almost blasphemous not to cry.
