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I made myself a hot chocolate, put a rom-com on the TV and climbed onto the couch with a comfortable fluffy blanket. I was the very image of pathetic, and I knew it. In fact, I reveled in it. Like a prisoner sitting in a cell for a crime they felt guilty about—I deserved to feel like shit.
I’d been given the chance at a relationship with someone pretty special and I’d managed to fuck it up. Just like everything else in my life. But at least my trashed house had been an easy fix. One simple cleaning spell later and the kitchen was spotless and no longer a reminder of what a spectacular failure Christmas day had been.
My phone began to ring, then shot a light in the air.Speak of the Devil.I sighed. There was only one person who called me in such a spectacularly over the top fashion, and I wasnotin the mood for it. “Hello mother,” I said curtly before, staring at the screen as I took a big gulp of my sweet drink, filled to the brim with pink and white mini marshmallows.
“Jaydy, what are you doing?” She tutted as though I was five years old and had gotten mud on my new dress.
“I’m enjoying my Christmas vacation,” I shot back at her.In a manner of speaking...“What are you doing?”
She had her long white hair swept up into a strange twist and dainty pearls adorned her ear lobes. “Oh, didn’t I mention, darling? We’re about to have dinner with the president of Austria,” she chirped, ever the consummate gossip and status-chaser.
I buried my lips in my hot chocolate, then answered. “Of course, you are.”
My mother tutted at me.
The blatant display of disapproval re-ignited the blaze of anger that my fight with Nicky had kindled. I lifted my gaze and glared at my mother’s sour face. “Do you want something, Mother?”
“I was only calling to check in for New Years Eve,” she said, patting down her hair as though looking in a mirror while she spoke to me. “I assume you received our invitation?”
To their house in Paris? Yeah, I’d gotten it. “I did, but I have plans. Maybe next year.”
My mother’s gaze narrowed. “You should come, Jaydy. There will be plenty of eligible bachelors there this year.”
I set my drink on the coffee table in front of me, not in the mood to pander to my mother’s bullshit today. “Thanks for the invitation, but I have plans,” I reiterated.
My mother’s smile fell, her expression unpleasant. “You know I can make you, Jaydy,” she threatened.
I straightened up and glared straight back at her. “Really?” I reached into my well of magic and snapped my fingers, transporting my mother from her house to my home in an instant.
She stood before me for the first time all year.
My gut churned, not with anxiety but with anger.
She blinked and glanced around at my homey little living room. “What did you do?” she accused.
I threw my blanket off my lap and got to my feet. “The same thing I should have bloody done on Christmas day! Made you come and visit me after I’d spent weeks looking forward to seeing you and had spent all morning preparing my house and the food for you.”
Mom rolled her eyes. “Oh Jaydy, stop being so dramatic, please. It’s unbecoming. You’re a grown woman, now. You have your own life, and we have ours. We don’t need to live in each other’s pockets all the time.”
“Each other’s pockets...” I repeated, unable to believe I was hearing the words. My temper exploded and I screamed in her face. “Are you actually fucking kidding me right now?”
My mother blinked, startled for what looked like the first time in her whole life. But I wasn’t done.
“You missed half my birthdays and most Christmas days as I was growing up because you were too busy sucking up to all the different courts and councils! It’s like I’ve meant absolutely fuck all to you.”
Mother sniffed and lifted her hands, inspecting her nails as she did when she wanted to avoid a touchy conversation. “You had a good childhood, Jaydy. Don’t be a brat. You travelled the world, had more toys than anyone you knew, and now... as an adult? You have power and connections and it’s all thanks to us.”
I tore at my hair and screamed again. “I didn’t want any of that! I still don’t! I just wanted my parents to love me, to show that they gave a bloody shit.”
Finally, my mother lifted her head and frowned at me as though she was confused.
I waited for her to deny my words, to declare that she did indeed love me. But she just stood there like a fucking formless statue. Like a robot. A heartless robot.
“Just go,” I said, flicking my hand and turning to walk back to the kitchen. I needed more than a hot chocolate after this conversation.
“Jaydy...” She finally called out.
I turned around, keeping my expectations rock-bottom low.
