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Pressing his forehead to hers, he closed his eyes. “I was angry. Disappointed. Hurt. But never hate. I can’t, Janie.” Opening his eyes, he let himself take in the beauty of her face. Was this, at last, the redemption of all that had been wasted between them? “I know it’s come out all wrong, but the truth is that I can’t stop loving you. I’m sorry for all the ways I broke your heart.” With a rattling inhale, Hunter took the final plunge. “Please tell me we can start again . . .”
Tears ran like spring rain down her soft face. Rather than answering, she pressed into his chest, slipping her arms around him. Hunter gathered her close, still uncertain about what her silence meant. But wanting more than his own reassurances for her heart’s healing. Clearly she needed it.
They both did.
After several long minutes, her shoulders calmed their quaking, her hold around him loosened, and she slid her hands back to his chest. Leaning back only enough to look up at him, she sniffed. “It’s been such a waste. These years of anger and bitterness.”
So much of Hunter wanted to agree and to turn away from those ugly memories. Dark years of loneliness. Of resentment and ugliness. He deeply regretted all of that. But the study he and John and Bennett and José had been doing gave him pause. Slowly he shook his head. “Nothing is wasted by God. Isn’t that something we can learn from Joseph, in Genesis?”
Those blue eyes widened, then Janie shook her head. “If I had been braver, we would have married. We could have been together this whole time, sharing happy memories rather than a seven-year war between us. Maybe we would have a couple of little ones by now, and . . .”
Her cheeks pinked, and he wondered why that embarrassed her. Hunter thrilled at the idea of raising a family with her. Right here in Luna, on the land of his inheritance at Lake Shore Splendor. He couldn’t think of anything that would speak redemption more clearly than that.
But that would keep for later.
Smoothing her hair away from her wet face, he silently prayed for right thinking. “What if I had never changed, because I got exactly what I wanted and didn’t feel the deep need of my soul? Maybe I wouldn’t have met the Brightons, and John wouldn’t have told me about Jesus.”
Janie’s furrowed brow smoothed.
Hunter let his hands drift down to hers, and then he clasped them. “And surely had we been together, you would have stopped me from sending Bennett to Elk Lake.”
At that, her lips parted. “I would have.”
Everything that was good and on the path to real healing now would never have sparked. Hazel wouldn’t have Bennett. Hunter and Hazel would never have had some of those hard, honest conversations, and they would still be at silent odds with each other. Their childhood would still be in the murky shadows of misunderstanding and resentment. And Bennett wouldn’t have woken from his own path of destruction via temporary amnesia and might still be the selfish, ungodly man he’d been before.
And those two precious teenage kids in Bennett’s care? They’d not be there in Luna with them, that was for certain.
Was it all worth the heartache between Hunter and Janie?
Don’t trust your own understanding . . .It was true! Hunter would never have understood any of that—even until this moment. But there it was—God had worked the bad for so much good!
Janie released a quavering breath. “I still regret hurting you, Hunter. I wish it had gone differently.”
Oh . . . the sweet ache those words provoked. Streams of healing ribboned around his heart, flowing into a river of renewed love. Stronger, deeper than it had ever been before. Now infused with the pure love that came from knowing and walking with God, who was the author of true romance.
That last thought gave Hunter pause.The author of true romance. . . He could trust that. It seemed like such a simple thing—that God wrote his story, guided his steps, and redeemed his missteps. And yet, wow!
God had miraculously penetrated his stubborn, arrogant heart. He’d shown him real love—the kind that took a rebellious man, an orphan, and loved him anyway. Renewed him. Gave him a fresh life, new hope.
And now this?
Hunter didn’t deserve it. Even when he’d tried to let Janie go, if that was what was best for her, he’d been ugly. And yet somehow here she was. Tucked against his chest, filling his arms. Drenching his heart.
“We’re different now.” Hunter secured her firmly against him. “I’m different now—and praise God for that. I’m still learning how to walk this new life. How to love better.”
Janie reached to slide her palm along the side of his face. “Maybe we can learn together?”
The miracle of her offer exploded in his mind, sent his heart leaping, and provoked a laugh-cry that seemed embarrassingly unmanly. Even so, he leaned to brush a kiss across her lips. “With all my heart, Janie. That’s what I want.”
As he retreated, she curled her fists into his shirt and pulled him back. Her kisses were sweet and lingering. Tender. Then passionate. When he thought his chest might explode, Hunter slowed their kisses until they cooled back to gentle tokens of promise.
“I’m glad I couldn’t do it,” Janie whispered.
“Do what?”
She searched his face, her study delaying on his eyes. Man, he could drown in those pools of blue, soft with love, warm with wonder. Then she traced the edge of his bottom lip with the pad of her thumb. A sweet torture that made him hungry for her soft kisses all over again.
“Stop loving you,” Janie responded.
