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“If he rejects you, then I will hunt him down myself and make sure that he regrets it.”
I giggle but immediately remind myself that his rejection is a serious possibility. Lorelai senses my change in mood and opens her mouth to speak again.
“In all seriousness, the only way you can know is to put yourself out there. If he slipped up yesterday, then chances are he is already close to giving up this charade. Lasta obviously loves you deeply. The only reason he even did this in the first place was to keep you safe.”
“You really think so?”
“I do. But there’s only one way for you to find out. You have to go to him immediately. Tell him how you feel. You can do this, Krista.”
I nod to myself. She’s right. And now that I have the courage, there’s no point in waiting another second. I say my goodbyes to Lorelai and head straight to where I know he’ll be.
The closer I get to the forge, the more nervous I get, but I have to ignore those feelings and just do it. Things cannot go on like this any longer. I have to fight for what I want. What I love.
As soon as I catch sight of him, I stop short.
“You can do this,” I whisper to myself. I take a deep breath before approaching.
“Captain Lasta, may I please have a word?” I keep my eyes downcast so as to avoid a heart attack when I look into those gold-slitted eyes.
“What is this regarding, slave?”
I almost flinch at the tone of voice and the use of the word slave, but I hold it in.
“Princess Aurora wanted me to pass along a message,” I lie.
“Okay, then. Follow me,” he says.
I do as he says and try to ignore the pang in my heart from how much I miss following his orders. The sense of purpose and the feeling of calm it always gave me is something I’ve missed gravely.
I’ve even resorted back to my old ways of self-harming just so I can feel something other than the sadness of no longer having Lasta in my life. If he knew about that… I don’t want to know what he would say. I don’t want to see the disappointment in those eyes.
Soon, we reach his office, and he shuts the door behind us.
“What did Princess Aurora have to tell me?”
Before he can stop me, I fling myself onto him, crushing his lips with mine. For a moment, both of us forget about our time apart, and it’s all fire and passion all over again.
Until it isn’t.
“What the fuck are you doing?” he shouts, finally pushing me off of him.
Both of us are out of breath, and I try to catch mine before speaking. I also try to remember what the fuck I came here for, having completely forgotten everything I had planned on saying the second our lips touched.
“Krista?” he asks expectantly.
Finally, I regain control of myself.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have tackled you like that. But I’m also not sorry, because I was only doing what both of us wanted.Which is what I came to talk to you about. I won’t put up with this anymore. I’m done. You and I belong together, and there is no reason that we shouldn’t be allowed to do so.”
Before he can protest, I continue.
“Yesterday, you said that you love me. You said that youlove me, Lasta. And I love you, too. I fuckinglove you, okay? And I don’t care that you’re naga and I’m a human. And no one else should care, either. I’m done caring. Why should I? Nothing in life matters if I can’t be happy with you. I have no purpose without you.”
“I need you to know that before I met you, I had nothing. I was nothing. No one looked twice at me, no one cared about me. I was all alone. And then when you showed up, I felt like I mattered. I felt likelifemattered. I found myself looking forward to each day and looking forward to the future. Do you know how great that felt?”
“Krista…”
“I’m not done. Look, I know that you felt the same way. And I know that you still do. All I’m saying is that there is no point in hiding it. We have no idea what will happen around here if war comes. We have no idea how much time either of us has here, and so why waste it being apart? If I died tomorrow, would you be happy knowing that you weren’t with me?”
