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Andrew hauled me against him and I sank into his chest. Maybe it made me weak to rely on him like this, but his strength felt so good.
“Alright, get your stuff. I’ll meet you downstairs.” His voice was deep and sure under my ear but I reared back.
“Oh no, you don’t have to come. I’ll be ok. I’ll get a car.” A hug, a conversation with Gerald I could handle, but having him fixing stuff for me felt like way too much. If I got too used to this, I would be even more devastated when it ended.
“You’re not going alone.” He folded his arms. “It’s 10 pm and you’re shaken up. Besides, where are you even going to get a car at this hour? I have one.”
I bit my lip. “Are you sure?”
He nodded. “Get your stuff. And since I don’t trust you to wait for me, I’ll see you back here in 10 minutes.” Something in me warmed at his concern. I didn’t want to love it, but I did. I was so screwed.
* * *
“This is a dumb car, Andrew.”I let out a surprised laugh as I circled the vehicle. Two doors, tiny trunk, impossibly low to the ground.
“Yeah, but it’s so fun.” He gave me a sexy wink and tossed our bags into the back. I sank into the low, plush seat and sighed. He revved the engine, gave me wide eyes, and pulled out of the garage.
“This is the only part of my former life that I’ve kept,” He said, as we slid smoothly through late night traffic toward Canal Street.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, that I was a right asshole in my day.” He grinned at me and glanced back at the road. I let out another surprised laugh. He was a pretty good sport.
“You don’t say,” I responded dryly.
“Mmm. I knew you would say that. You know I used to wear one of those douchey monogrammed blazers to class?”
“Oh no.” I groaned. “I would have made so much fun of you.”
“As opposed to now, when you’re fawning at my feet.” His tone was equally dry.
I looked over at him. The noise of Manhattan, which was typically overwhelming at this time on a Saturday, was silenced in the car’s luxurious interior. All I heard were his steady breaths and the soft thrum of the radio. Andrew drove like he worked, confident, focused, one hand on the wheel, the other on his knee. He was really fucking hot.And I was in deep trouble.
I was falling for him. And how could I not? I dared any woman to try and resist the full force of his attentions. I loved his dry humor, his laughing eyes, his soft lips so at odds with the harsh planes of his face. I squeezed my eyes shut. I loved his unwavering support of me, his determination to succeed, his ruthless ambition. I wanted all of it. But we were speeding towards an expiration date and I was pretty sure a little part of me would die when we had to be strangers again.
“Are you ok?” His voice was quiet. I was not ok. My heart was going to break when the partner decisions were made. It was going to be him and I would never be able to forgive him for it. And I would hate myself for not being the bigger person.
“I’m ok.” My voice came out watery and weak.
“Yeah, you sound totally fine,” he teased. Somehow his teasing made it worse.
“I’m just worried about my mom.” I stared out the window, hoping he couldn’t see my eyes welling. Looking over at him would kill me. All I would see were his capable hands and his concern for me.
“Has this happened before? I mean, she can’t be that frail, right? You’re not that old.”
“No, nothing like that.” I sighed. I was worried about her, and I would rather talk about this than talk about us. “The truth is, both Emily and I are a little too protective of our parents. They’ve done their best for us and we look at them now…and it’s just hard not to seeoldpeople. I can’t help feeling like the world has left them behind. As a child, they were these titans. They could solve any problem for me. And now, they seem smaller. I hate it.” I leaned my head against the cool glass.
“You’re a really good daughter to them.” His voice was earnest and I smiled sadly.
“Not really. I don’t see them enough. The job takes me away from a lot.”
“You’re doing your best.” His words were tight and I looked over, startled. Both hands gripped the wheel.
“Are youmadat me?” Because that would be insane.
“No. I mean, yes.” His finger tapped against the wheel. “Someone, somewhere along the line, made you believe you’re not enough. I fucking hate that. I want to punch that person in the face.” A breath loosed from his chest. “Except I think that person might have been me.”
I was already shaking my head when he looked over, vulnerability stark on his face. “No, Andrew. No, it wasn’t you.”
