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“Yes,” I reply. “I didn’t think you noticed.”
My words are meant as a bit of a challenge, but he rises to it before I can even give him a quizzical eyebrow. “I’m not always the best at showing emotion,” he says.
I can’t help but laugh. “You think?” I say as I chuckle.
Another first — he looks faintly embarrassed at that. “I’m going to do better from now on. I’m making it my target for the year. Write it on all the reports: my target this year is to prove to you how vital you are to the company, and how vital you are to me. I couldn’t have done the last two weeks without you. These kids would have killed me.”
I laugh again, but my mind is reeling over what that all means. For the first time, I’m almost doubting my decision to leave Adler Motors. If he really is going to change, if he really will listen to what I have to say and treat me like a human being, is leaving going to be a horrible mistake? Iwantto leave andhave done for months, and now a job that’s going to give me a real purpose has practically fallen into my lap. It seems unquestionable that that’s what I should do.
But I never expected Lucas to care. For years, he hasn’t. He pays well, sure, but working for him is draining the life out of me. Is money worth no time to use it in?
I feel like I’m balancing my dreams against the practicality of a well-paid job. Two hours ago, it wouldn’t have been in question what the answer was.
Am I stupid to think everything could change so quickly?
“Lucas, I…” I stammer, unable to summon the words that could even slightly begin to describe what I’m feeling right now.
Fortunately, I’m spared from having to muster a coherent reply to one of the weirdest conversations I’ve ever been part of, because someone calls my name.
We both turn to look, and to both my delight and horror, I see my sister Katie waving at me and heading towards us. “Sophie!” she grins.
Lucas gives me a look that asks a thousand questions, and I shoot him a look back that doesn’t answer any of them. “My sister,” is about all the explanation I can manage before she bounds up to us and wraps me up in a giant hug like she knows I need it.
Then she takes a step back to eye up Lucas, and then the stroller, and says, “What in the world are you guys doing here?”
CHAPTER 18
LUCAS
“Lucas, this is my sister Katie,” says Sophie, glancing between us like she’s not entirely certain what's going to happen next.
“Hello,” I say curtly, holding out my hand for her sister to shake. That crinkle of the eyebrows must be genetic, because she gives me the exact same confused and bewildered expression Sophie’s been giving me so often recently.
“Nice to meet you,” says Katie, grasping my hand firmly.
Her two kids blink up at me with a synchronized show of interrogative stares. And I thought it was just Jason’s kids who looked at me like this. Maybe all children come with a special setting to make you feel guilt-tripped into taking care of them.
“And who’s this gentleman?” Katie asks Sophie with a wicked twinkle in her eye. I can see where this is going and I don't like it.
“This is Lucas,” says Sophie carefully, her tone a crafted neutral. It’s a tone, I realize with sudden clarity, that I’ve heard a thousand times. It’s a tone she must have perfected speaking to me. “He’s my boss.”
“Oh,thatLucas,” says Katie, her smirk widening. I don’t bother to ask her what she means by that. I’m sure Sophie’s bitched about me behind my back more than enough times to her and the whole family. And I’m sure I deserve most of it. God knows what impression Katie has of me right now, but I’m sure it’s not good.
This is off to a bad start.
“What are you guys doing here?” asks Katie again, tilting her head ever so slightly as she looks between us. “Sophie, don’t tell me you’ve finally gone and got yourself a man.”
Sophie flaps her hand playfully at her sister, shaking her head in embarrassed disbelief, or perhaps disgust. I clench my fists awkwardly. Embarrassment is another feeling I’m not particularly well acquainted with.
“Shut up,” says Sophie, rolling her eyes. “He’s just the boss.”
Somehow, that ‘just’ cuts deep into me. I don’t need a therapist to tell me why this conversation is affecting me so much. It’s happening a little too soon after all my revelations for me to feel comfortable having it.
“I don’t know,” says Katie. “You could be a cute couple in a kind of twisted way.”
“We’re not a couple,” I say, perhaps a little too firmly. Sophie grimaces at me. Her discomfort is as obvious as mine as she picks at the skin around her nails and shuffles from foot to foot.
Saying those words feels like a betrayal of everything I’ve been feeling over the last few days, but Sophie's sister is threatening to ruin everything I’ve been working on by making dumb jokes. I’m not willing to let that happen.
