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“He’s cute.” I slur to her as I order two more beers and two more shots for us.
She nods as she watches him walk across the dance floor. “Yes. He. Is. Yummy.” She fans herself and then turns back to me when she can no longer ogle him from across the room.
“What’s his name?”
“No idea.” We both laugh.
“Looks like you two were getting’ pretty cozy. You should at least get his name.”
“I will when we get back out there. If he’s still there. Tonight’s ‘bout us.”
I shake my head, “No. Tonight’s about getting’ drunk and dancing. If you meet someone, go for it. Don’t lose out on account of me.”
“How about this? If either of us meet someone we want to go home with tonight, then we take advantage of any opportunities that may arise. Sound good?”
I start laughing, “You want permission to go on a booty call? You don’t need my permission, Grace. If you want to fuck him, have fun. No hard feelings.”
“No. What about you? You could meet someone.” She sounds so defensive and a little drunk.
“Sweetie, if you find a connection, go for it, but I’m not looking for anyone.” I hug my friend. “Honestly. Go if you want to. Don’t think twice ‘bout me.”
“Let’s not worry about that right now. I don’t even know his name, for fuck sakes.” She hugs me back. “I’m going to find you someone tonight.” She scans the bar. “How about that guy?”
I don’t even look to where she’s pointing. “Nope. Not interested.”
“You didn’t even look.”
I raise my eyebrows and nod, “I don’t have to ‘cuz I’m not interested. Let’s drink.” I raise my beer up.
“I don’t know. He seems pretty interested in you.” She mimics my motion with her beer.
“Grace. I’m not interested in finding anyone. Especially in a bar.” I snap at her. I’m so tired of her frustrating need to set me up. It’s exhausting. I just want to do what we planned; drink and dance.
She turns to me, and I just stare straight ahead and sip my beer, my foot tapping to the beat of the country song playing. I don’t know what it’s called, but I like it.
“I know you don’t want to talk about it, but it’s been five years, Kate. I know he broke your heart, but not every guy will do what he did.”
I swing around on the barstool to face her, my head a bit woozy from the alcohol. “He didn’t just break my heart, Grace. He shattered it. He ripped it to shreds. He killed my self-confidence. He murdered my spirit. He made me believe I was worthless. He made me feel like I was inconsequential.”
“You’re none of those.” Grace places her hand on mine.
“I know that! It has taken me these five years to get myself back to who I am. I’m not looking to change that ever again. So please stop trying to set me up. Stop telling me to get out there, to get back on the horse. I don’t want to. I have no interest in letting someone get that close to me again. Okay? Am I being clear, Grace? Are you fucking getting it!?” The frustration in my voice is coming through. It’s not fair to talk to her like this; she only means well, but this is not the weekend to come at me with this shit. Plus, I’ve had too much tequila and beer for this conversation.
“Yes. Perfectly clear.” I can hear the hurt in her voice and suddenly this night out has taken a nosedive. “I’m going to go back out on the dance floor.” She takes the last sip of her beer and walks away from me.
“Grace.” I call after her, but she pretends she doesn’t hear me and finds her friend out on the floor and starts dancing.
“Can I get you another?” The bartender asks me as she grabs our empty beer bottles to throw them away.
I nod, “Yeah. Please.”
“Coming right up.” She returns quickly with a fresh, cold beer and another shot of tequila. “Here you go. Let me know if you want another shot.”
I immediately shoot it down and slam the shot glass on the bar. “Yeah. I’ll have another shot. Make it a double.”
“No, she won’t.” A deep voice that I recognize, but can’t place, says from behind me. I turn to find Lieutenant Hudson Taylor from the fire station standing behind me. “She’s cut off, Steph. Please get her a glass of water.”
The bartender, Steph, nods her head. “Yes, boss.” She turns to give me an apologetic look, leaves a glass of water, and walks away.
