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“I’m thrilled to hear that,” I mutter. “Warden.”
She ignores the sarcasm in my tone.
“My name is Kira Flynn,” she says instead. “Warden, to you. I’m sorry about your sentencing. It’s difficult for anybody.”
This time, I have nothing at all to say, so I don’t. But the warden continues to stand there anyway.
“Would you like to speak to our counselor?” she asks after another moment. I don’t mean to, but I laugh, because it sounds so ridiculous right now.
“I didn’t see a therapist when I was free, and I don’t intend on seeing one now.” When she doesn’t answer, I add, “Warden.”
“So be it.” Warden Flynn nods at Jaxon, then turns to leave. Before she does, she turns back to me with her hand on the doorknob. “Hopefully we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other now.”
I don’t dignify this with an answer, and she doesn’t push me to. Instead, she walks out the door as Mia Armstrong walks in for the strip search, along with the nice nurse whose name I don’t yet know. Ms. Armstrong nods at me.
“You know the process. Let’s get this over with.”
“Haveyou ever considered that maybe she is using you to stay out of prison?” The touch of Lace’s fingers against my bare back is enough to send chills down my spine. I bury my head into the pillow and take a deep breath, allowing my whole body to relax. The news has spread from woman to woman in this prison, with no help from me. I’m fucked, and they all know it. It’s official; I’m one of them.
“Whatever she’s doing, it’s not intentional,” I mumble. “I imagine she’s just scared. I didn’t want to come here either.”
“I’d lose my shit if my sister didn’t show up for the court hearing,” Lace says with a shrug. I don’t say anything, because she’s right. Julie had been my last hope, and she’d failed to show. “I’m sorry,” she continues, rubbing small circles on my bare back with her thumb. “As much as I want to have you around for a while, I wouldn’t wish this place on anybody.”
“Me either.”
“Why did you take the fall for her?” she asks after a moment of silence. “Regardless of which way you thought it would turn out, why not let her take the fall for her own mistake?”
“He was beating her, Lace.” I shrug her hand away, roll over, and sit up, pulling the bed sheet with me to cover my breasts. “He was hurting her, and she was defending herself.”
“Okay, but he still died.” Lace reaches for me, but I pull away a bit, irritated. When her hand drops into her lap, she frowns. “He still died, Joey, and she still killed him. Not you.”
“I would have killed him, too, if he hadn’t had already been unconscious by the time I got there.”
“That’s not the point.” Lace scoots back so that she can get a good look at me. I feel vulnerable under her gaze, but I don’t try to cover up anymore. It doesn’t matter. She can see right through me no matter how many layers I might or might not have on.
“So, what is the point?”
“The point is, you didn’t bash him, Joey. Your sister did. She bashed him, and it killed him, and now you’re protecting her … but from what?”
I don’t say anything for a long while, but Lace waits, patiently, her cornflower blue eyes unwavering from my own. After a few more moments, I lay back down, onto my stomach, so Lace can continue to touch my skin. It’s comforting, and it makes it easier to talk.
“Julie and I had a shitty childhood,” I say. “Our mom was a fucking junkie and our dad was an abusive son of a bitch. We had no chance, really.”
“So, you had to protect your sister from your parents.”
“Totally cliché, right?”
“Like it came straight out of a book.”
We laugh. It feels good to laugh; or better yet, to have somebody to laugh with. Lace’s company is the only reason I haven’t tried to off myself yet. Everyone speaks about how horrible it is in prison—and it is—but many of the same people have never lived an uncomfortable life. On the streets. Cold. Afraid.
Alone.
“Thanks for being here.” I turn my head to the side as Lace begins to kiss the bare skin of my back, leaving a tingling sensation in her wake. Her lips are so soft, like silk against my skin, and I can barely control the slivers of pleasure that shoot down my spine. She lowers her lips to my ear and whispers the words I want to hear.
“Right now, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
Chapter Nine
