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“J?”
My name was nothing more than a whisper. I glanced up, my lips parting at the time. Was it almost midnight, already?
Back I went to watching her and tracing the indents. We’d completely missed dinner. I was used to leading odd hours, but not her. Kody was routine. She had a time for things, and she stuck with them. Even if she didn’t eat. How many times had she made herself food, or ordered in, and not touched it? I’d completely lost track of her needs. I didn’t want to do that. I knew how one could spiral if routine was the only thing holding them together.
Another whimper. Her lips trembled, and I walked around the sofa, easing her into my arms. Her dress slid up to her hips, exposing scars and brands I hadn’t seen yet. The damage stopped me dead in my tracks. She never dressed in her room. She’d always been covered since her rescue. They were all over then, but it was dark. In the light, I saw just how bad she was.
“J?”
“Shh. It’s okay, doll. I’m taking you to bed.”
Kody sighed, moving her head more into my neck as I made our way into her bedroom. If I could just stop and keep her like this. Keep me like this. There was a calming amongst the storm. A heat in the ice cold inside of me. My eyes closed. Her smell. The warm breath against my neck.
“You smell good.”
My eyes opened, and I eased her to the comforter. It was still pulled down from where she’d been asleep earlier. As if it were automatic, her good arm went up towards the headboard, and she turned on her side. Dammit. I’d have to get her restraints from her house too. Or…
I lowered, sitting on the edge. The shift had Kody’s arm lifting so she could peek out from behind her bicep at me.
“Wait, are you leaving to go to my place now? I should stay awake.”
“No. We’re not going to worry about that right now. I want you to go back to sleep. Kody…” My mind went back to how I’d meant to set this up as a playroom. I’d never gotten that far, but I still had what she needed the most. “How would you feel about the real thing. Real cuffs. Not shackles that will cut into you, but something softer yet more secure than silk?”
Her head lifted as she positioned herself on her elbow. Slowly, she looked down to her wrist.
“You have real cuffs? Like the kind they wear in the.” She stopped and blushed.
“The photos you like to look at? Yeah, I do. Do you want to try one and see how it feels?”
Silence. Kody hesitated for only a moment as her breath deepened. It was enough to make me reign in every ounce of control. We wanted the same thing, but we weren’t there yet.
“Hold on.”
I leaned forward, reaching behind the back of the bed. Kody gasped, moving closer as I pulled the cuff free from the lower back side.
“You’ll have more room than it coming directly from above. It’s set up for you to be outstretched. I can change that if you want. Would you like it over your head?”
“Please.”
Thump-thump. Thump-thump.
My pulse skyrocketed as I changed out the position of the cuffs. One in view now, but both would be available when it was time.
“I’m going to give you some privacy. I have some shirts in the top drawer. Take a shower and change out. Call me when you’re ready.”
“You want to put it on me?”
I pulled up her wrist, not breaking eye contact as I kissed against the inside, over her scars.
“Every night. My cuffs, my rules.”
Chapter 16
Kody
Maybe I should have said no thanks. It’s not like it was vital I had to sleep with the cuff on. I just wouldn’t be able to sleep as well. I was so tired. Nervous. Intrigued. Should I do this? Would it make this need worse? Better?
I opened the bathroom door, feeling the large shirt brush just above my knee as I came face-to-face with the bed. With nothing underneath, taking in the cuff on my silk pillow, I’d never felt so exposed. It couldn’t be helped. I had no clean undergarments. I was stuck like this until I was able to get clean clothes in the morning. And that cuff…
