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Is that what he thinks of me?
“Sure, sure,” says Rose, hurriedly. “I just wish I had known, is all, because I really wanted to talk to you. I felt so bad about what happened with Ben. I know I shouldn’t have told him where to find you. It was just, he was so insistent, you know? And I thought he was just coming to give you your money back. I didn’t think he would cause so much trouble.”
She glances nervously at Jack, who glowers at her.
At least I’m not the only one in the bad books, then.
“I really am sorry,” she goes on, pleadingly. “I feel terrible about it. I hardly even slept that night. It was terrible.”
She opens her eyes wide, as if she’s looking for sympathy, and something in me snaps.
“I’m sorry your own actions made you miss some of your beauty sleep, Rose,” I say shortly. “I can’t even imagine how awful that must have been for you. It’s obvious that you’re the real victim here.”
Jack shakes his head wearily, and Rose blinks a couple of times before turning back to face the front. In the mirror, Elaine gives me a surreptitious thumbs up, which makes me feel fractionally better.
Not even Rose has anything to say after that, so the silence descends once more, and accompanies us all the way home, like an awkward third wheel on a disastrous blind date. Rose slinks off as soon as we’re inside, having presumably realized that this is one show she’s not going to be star of, and Jack pushes open the door of his office and stands back to let me go inside, as if I’m attending an interview for a job I didn’t actually apply for and he’s my reluctant interviewer.
“This is all a bit formal, don’t you think?” I say nervously, as he sits down behind the desk, leaving me with the choice of either the sofa on the other side of the room or the chair opposite him. “Why don’t we go and get a coffee? Or we could, I don’t know, go for a walk, maybe?”
I do not actually want to go for a walk or have a coffee. I just want to doanythingother than sit stiffly opposite my fiancé, feeling like I’ve been summoned to the headmaster’s office for a telling off. Or to be expelled.
This is the Jack I don’t normally get to see: the one who was CEO of his own app-development business by the time he graduated from university, and who sold it a couple of years ago for the kind of figure you normally only see written on those giant cardboard checks when someone wins the lottery. For the most part, it’s normally pretty easy for me to forget all of that, and only seemyJack: the one who hogs the duvet and cried at theThis Is Usfinale. That’s the Jack I know. That’s not, however, the Jack who is currently sitting opposite me. And, for the first time, I can suddenly see why most of the staff at The 39 are afraid of him, and why we’d been dating for over a year before Mum was able to stop herself calling him “Mr. Buchanan” every time he came round.
Right now, he is very much ‘Mr. Buchanan’.
This does not bode well for me.
“I’m not really in the mood for a walk or a coffee, Emerald,” he says bluntly, confirming my suspicions. “I have work to do. And I don’t want to bump into Mum or Dad and have to explain what’s going on with us right now. They were confused enough by your disappearing act the other night?”
“Mydisappearing act?” I say incredulously, trying not to think about the fact that he’s planning on going straight back to work after this interview. “That’s pretty rich, coming from the guy who waltzed off to London and didn’t bother to contact me for two days. You obviously managed to contact your parents, though, if you know they were confused. So that must have been nice for them.”
Okay, that’snothow I planned to open this conversation. Iwasgoing to go with something along the lines of “I’m sorry I ever doubted you, please forgive me,” but if Jack absolutelyinsistson trying to imply I’m the only one who’s made a mistake here, then…
“I wanted to contact you too,” he mutters, looking down at the desk. “But I didn’t know what to say. I was scared I’d say the wrong thing and just upset you all over again. I just can’t seem to get it right, no matter how hard I try. Then Mum told me you hadn’t come home, and—”
“I went to my parents’ place,” I interject tearfully. “I already told you that. And I didn’t tell your parents or Rose because I honestly didn’t think they’d even notice I was gone.”
“That’s ridiculous, Emerald,” Jack says, sighing. “Of course they noticed. They were worried.”
I don’t believe this for a second. The only thing that would have worried the Buchanans last night was the thought that I might come back. But I don’t want to talk about Jack’s parentsorhis sister. I want to talk aboutus. And that’s proving much harder than it ought to be.
“Jack, I’m sorry,” I say at last. “The whole thing with McTavish — it was amazing of you. Really. And I should have known you would do the right thing. Ididknow. I mean, of course I did. It’s just Ben… well, you don’t know what he’s like. How manipulative he can be. But that’s on me,” I add hurriedly, seeing the look on Jack’s face. “I let him get inside my head with those stupid messages, and I shouldn’t have. I know that now.”
I’m close to tears again by the time I finish this short speech, but Jack just stares at me impassively. As if I’m some stranger whose excuses could not possibly be less important to him.
As ifIcouldn’t possibly be less important to him.
“Did you know he and Rose knew each other?” I go on shakily when he still doesn’t speak. “He told me they were part of some kind of gambling ring back in London. That’s why he took my money. Apparently he’d racked up so much debt with them he had to run, because he knew he couldn’t pay it back. He says they’re still after him.”
“Good,” says Jack shortly. “I hope they find him. He’s caused more than enough trouble.”
“Rose hasn’t exactly been trouble-free either,” I point out, unable to stop myself this time. “If she hadn’t encouraged him to come here and find me, then none of this would have happened. And she was the one who told him about McTavish and the land, too. Did you know that?”
“Are you defending him?” says Jack angrily. “Are you actually trying to defend him now?”
“No, of course not,” I reply, stung. “I just don’t think he’s the only person you should be angry with right now.”
“Oh, he’s not,” Jack assures me, shaking his head. “I’ll be speaking to Rose about this later, believe me. I can’t believe she didn’t tell me she knew him. The very least she could have done was give me a heads up that he was on the way here, rather than trying to pretend she’d arranged some kind of romantic dinner for us and your ex-boyfriend.”
