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And he still can.
Which is why I deleted the message from Alex Russell of the Tinseltown bloody Insider as soon as I’d read it, and called McTavish instead. And now here I am, about to start a job that will put me right back into Jett’s orbit.
And, of course, Violet’s.
Asher is going to bewildwhen he finds out about this.
“None of the guests are here this afternoon,” says Hazel, who seems to have an uncanny knack of knowing exactly what I’m thinking. “It’s the first day of filming, and everyone staying here’s connected to the film in some way. So I could show you one of the cabins, if you like?”
“Sure,” I reply, trying my best to sound breezy, and to absolutelynotthink about Jett and Violet off filming together. “That would be… helpful.”
Hazel gestures for me to follow her, and I walk on suddenly shaky legs out of the clubhouse, and towards the first of the log cabins, which are dotted over the hillside, each with their own wrap-around deck and hot tub, and all of them carefully angled to provide the perfect view down to the loch. From the top of the hill, it looks a bit like a very exclusive version of Hobbiton, and it’s not even remotely hard to see why even A-listers like Jett and Violet might be impressed with it.
It’s a clear day, so the mountains which surround the water stand out against the blue sky, looking almost as if they’ve been painted onto it. In the center of the loch, the ruined castle sits on its island, looking wistfully out to shore, and, just opposite it, I can see the chimneys of Jack and Emerald’s house peeking up from above the trees that surround it.
There are a few solitary figures dotted around the loch side, but no sign of a film crew. I’m briefly relieved — I know the castle is one of the locations Justin Duval had talked about using for his film — then I realize that if they’re not filming at the castle, it just means they’ll be filming somewhere else. And if they’re notfilming, they’ll still be together. Possibly in one of these cabins. Maybe even the one Hazel’s opening the door ofnow.
I swallow nervously as I step inside.
“This one is Macduff’s,” says Hazel, giving me permission to relax again. “It’s one of the smaller cabins. The biggest ones have their own internal saunas, so the guests don’t have to come up to the clubhouse if they don’t want to.”
Jett and Violet will have one of the biggest ones, then. Probablythebiggest one. I really want to ask Hazel if they’re sharing a cabin, but I also know the answer might tip me over the edge, and I really need to keep this job, so I manage to keep my mouth shut as I follow her around the cabin — which is actually pretty large, for all that it’s supposedly one of the “smaller” ones.
If I don’t ask, she can’t tell me the answer. And if I don’t know forsurethat they’re together, I can keep on pretending that they mightnotbe.
I guess that’s how I’ll get through this.
IfI get through this.
“And this is the main bedroom,” says Hazel, showing me a room with bi-fold doors opposite the kingsize bed, which allows the occupants to look out at the loch without even having to get up. There’s another bedroom upstairs, and an open-plan living area on this level, with a wood burner stove and large screen TV. It’s the last word in luxury: and when I think about Jett and Violet enjoying it together, it makes my hangover come back with a vengeance — or the nausea part of it, at least.
Hazel leads me back out of the cabin and up the hill to the clubhouse, where McTavish is waiting for us.
“Right,” he says, handing me a badge with my name on it in capital letters. “Stick that on and we’ll get ye started.”
I’m pretty sure I’m not going to be needing the name badge — it’s not like anyone who’s staying here won’t recognize me — butI pin it onto my chest, and go to join him behind the reception desk.
“What am I going to be doing?” I ask nervously, hoping to God he’s not going to say cleaning; not because I don’twantto clean, you understand (It’s the closest thing I have to a hobby, so I’d probably find it quite therapeutic), but because that would mean I’d have to go into Jett’s/Violet’s cabin — and surely not even McTavish is mad enough to think that would end well for any of us?
“Och, a bit o’this, a bit o’ that,” he replies, confirming my suspicion that he’s only given me this job because… becausewhat, though? Because he’s a decent guy, who feels sorry for me? Or because he’s secretly in love with me, and can’t stand the thought of not seeing me all the time?
Neither one of those options sounds particularly good to me. I don’t want his charity — which is what this is, if there really isn’t any work for me to do here — and Idefinitelydon’t want him thinking I might be interested in him.
Even though I told Grace I was secretly seeing him.
I should really try to speak to her about that, shouldn’t I?
“You’re not going to get into trouble for this, McTavish, are you?” I ask anxiously. “With Asher? Or Violet? I don’t expect either of them will be thrilled to find me here.”
I glance around the clubhouse, as if one of them might be about to walk in on us at any moment.
“That Asher isn’t here,” McTavish says cheerfully. “He had to go back to America. So ye don’t need to worry about him. And as for Violet King, well…”
He pauses, then shrugs.
“I suppose we’ll just have to keep ye out of her way,” he says. “They work long hours, these actor types. Or so I’ve heard, anyway. Night shoots, and a’ that. So, wi’ a bit o’ luck, ye might no’ even see her.”
I very much doubt this, somehow, but the thought of my overdraft limit, and how it’s about to be breached, keeps me silent.
