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“You going to drink your dinner today, big guy?”
“I don't need much. And my stomach needs to recover after all the food you've had me eat the last two days.”
“You need to stop sounding older than you are.” He takes one of the bags and snatches some of the change from my hand to shove it in the tip jar.
“Did I say you could do that?” I walk after him as he takes off toward the front.
“No, but I thought we'd mix in a little good with the bad. That guy looked like he needed the money more than you.”
“Fine, but don't do it again without asking first.” We both slide back into the rental and he's wearing a sympathetic expression.
“Sorry, Daddy. I didn't mean to upset you again.”
That damn name. He keeps calling me that, and I get a little thrill from it this time. Why? I've heard Andres use it with Zacharias more times than I'd care to and never understood why he responded to it. Not until I'm gazing into the blue eyes of thecute little drug mule beside me, tempted to offer him the whole fucking world. I want to take him in my arms, rub his head, and tell him it's okay.
Instead, I follow the voice of reason in my head. It's not as loud as it was before but thankfully hasn't completely disappeared. “Don't call me that, and it's fine. I know you meant well by it.”
He's happy enough with my response to give me a half smile and rest his hand on mine. “I really did. I'll try to think before I do things from now on.” His eyes say what his mouth doesn't. This is something he'll only do for me and me alone. Yeah, we need to hurry up and get out of this damn car. Not like being in another room with him all night will help either but at least there will be more space between us. Will he let there be though? And will I make him when he really needs to be close in order to feel safe?
I don't care. I don't. I can't. He's better than I thought he'd be—with his tricks and deviant ways. He won't fool me like he has others. This is a ploy to catch me off guard and either confine or kill me so he can get away without me going after him. If only it felt that way.
“Tony,” he says, pulling me from the war I'm currently in with myself.
“Yeah.” The engine roars as I turn the key in the ignition, doing nothing to drown out the sucking sounds he's making around his lollipop.
“Are you going to try to sleep on the floor again?”
“No. I don't plan on sleeping.” After gently shaking his hand away, I place both of mine on the wheel and pull out of the store parking lot.
“At all?”
“I've gone longer. I'll be fine. You need to worry about yourself more than me. When you’re tired your anxiety is worse.” Being well rested definitely has improved his mood. It must be thesecond thing aside from food he was talking about when he was all smiles at the diner. But why’d he say he'd need to put on a movie to block out his screaming? There isn't a single moment in the day where this guy doesn't have my mind spinning.
More sucking sounds fill the car as he goes back to his candy, staring out the window. I'm thankful for the silence during our very short drive and bet it's all I'll get for a while. He tosses the white stick in the bag as we arrive back at the motel. Grabbing his bag, he gets out of the car and I follow him back into the room. Gio is right where we left him, looking at me with pleading eyes when I open the closet door. “You'll be staying there the rest of the night, so I hope you're comfy.” His muffled sounds don't disappear after I close the closet, so I turn on the TV, tossing Phillip the remote. I'm not surprised by his choice of Cartoon Network either as he empties his bag on the bed.
“Sure you don't want a sandwich?” He holds one of the containers in the air.
“I'm sure.”
Sitting with his back to the headboard, he eats one of his many sandwiches and bags of chips. His giggles fill the room and it's much better than all the moaning Gio's doing.
I turn on the lamp when the sun starts going down, and Phillip disappears into the bathroom to brush his teeth, leaving the door wide open. We switch places, and he's undressing when I return to the room, his shirt falling to the floor before he reaches for his pants.
Quickly turning around, I face the wall until he's all tucked in and then move to the chair in the corner of the room the moment he's done. I don't miss the way he stares at me and pretends to be paying attention to the weird cartoon playing on the TV.
“Tony?” he whispers, reaching over to turn off the lamp.
“Yeah?” I answer, keeping my eyes on the screen.
“You think you tied that man up good enough?”
My gaze shifts to him curling into himself and staring at the closet.
“I'm sure. Why?”
“You checked all his pockets and clothes?” His teeth chatter.
“I did. You were fine a bit ago. What's the problem now? What happened to the man looking harmless?”
