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“I know. But you're also my best friend and you deal with my crazy ass.”
He’s right. I don’t try to understand Toby. The man has been through some shit and is still here, still dealing with it. I do my best to be there for him and support him because he’s more of a brother than a friend.
If this helps him keep his cool a little better, then I guess I’ll have to at least try. Not going to lie, the idea of hanging out with Lilly more feels good.
“Are you going to try being friends with her like you said yesterday?”
“Yeah. I can’t keep being an asshole to her. It hurts too much. And the pain on her face when I do.” He shakes head. “I fucking hate myself for how I treated her the past few years. I fucking miss her, and it kills me.”
“Time to get back what we had before?”
“Yeah. I fucking need it more than I thought I would.”
Me too, man, me too.
Chapter 10
Lillianna
“What are we doing here?” Bianca groans as we step in the school's hockey arena. People are mulling around, but overall it’s empty in here. By the looks of it, all the puck bunnies are hanging out.
“Because, we have nothing to do and our bestie is practicing. Also, I miss my dad. I want to say hi.” I shrug my shoulders as we walk toward the rink’s entrance.
It’s not completely a lie. As much as I don’t want to admit it, in a way I’m not any better than the puck bunnies. Only in high school I wasn’t there to see just any player.
I’ve seen Bishop and Toby in a few games since they’ve started at SVU but I haven’t come to a practice yet.
The idea of seeing Toby all sweaty in his gear? Yeah, it’s wrong, but it does something very sinful to my body.
Just because I’m trying to move on, doesn’t mean I can’t look. I’m not going to touch. Even though I really want to.
“Fine, but I’m studying while we’re in there,” Bianca informs me, pulling open the doors.
I roll my eyes. “Girl, we’ve been in classes for three days now. Three. We don’t even have any work due.”
“I might.” She gives me a guilty smile. “I may have been distracted by a really cute guy who gave me his number before class in English Lit. And I may or may not have texted him, causing me to miss most of the class. So now I have to copy the notes Jill gave me.”
“Girl!” My eyes widen and I laugh, slapping her arm. “No. We are not going to let boys get in the way of our education.”
“I know,” She groans as she walks up the steps of the bleachers. “But he’s really cute.”
“I’m sure he is.” I giggle. Bee takes a seat near the players bench, but I go and hang out with my dad. “Hey, Dad.”
He looks over at me, his black curly hair hanging over his left eye. “Hey, sweetie. What are you doing here?”
I take a seat next to him on the bench. “Just wanted to see you. It’s been a few days.”
“Almost a week. Your moms have been counting,” he chuckles. “I’ve also had to tell Brody and Chase that we can’t track you down just to say hello.”
“Oh, god!” The words come out as a groan but end with me laughing. “I should go by and see them, shouldn’t I?”
“Might be a good idea.” He gives me a grin. “You know I can’t hold those two back for too long.”
“I don’t know.” I knock my shoulder into his. “You just gotta bat your pretty lashes at Brody, and he’s putty in your hands.”
My dads, Jax and Brody, are a couple, an adorable one at that. Brody might come off as a scary asshole, and yes, that is one of many things I’ve heard people call him. Yet when it comes to me, my mom, and Jax, he’s nothing but a big teddy bear.
Jax shakes his head, a grin playing on his lips. “So, how are you doing?”
