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Chapter 3
Finn
The sun hasn’t been up for long when I hop out of my car and make my way inside the grocery store. In a smaller town like Reverdale, Missouri, it’s best to get your shopping done before the early birds buy up all the good shit.
God, I can’t wait to get out of this backwards-ass town. I love the hustle and bustle of big cities. Reverdale ain’t it. Also, being one of the only gay men around, it’s hard to feel like I fit in. The friends I grew up with are cool, but they started to distance themselves from me when I officially came out at sixteen. It’s one thing for people to assume—it’s another to confirm. Only one friend, Sy, stuck around. I love her to the moon and back.
I have to go to Kansas City or St. Louis to find my people. That’s why I’m saving up money to get the fuck away from here. Moving somewhere I won’t be stared at like a freak because I like dick.
I clutch the coupons that I meticulously clipped tightly in my hand, ready to get as many discounts as I can. Fuck this town for not having the capability to scan clipped coupons from your phone. I have money to buy things full price, but why do that when I can save a few pennies to go to my moving fund?
The interior of the store is blessedly cool and I’m thankful. The day hasn’t really started and I can already feel it’s stifling heat. I pull one of the few carts from beside my door, hoping to get my shopping done quickly.
“Mornin,’ Finn,” Mrs. Jasper, the main store clerk says, peering down her nose at me. These old fucking people always look down on me for my sexuality. I don’t care. I stopped giving a fuck after my father died and my mom showed she couldn’t give a fuck less about me. At least she pays the bills so I can save and blow this fucking town.
I give her a saccharine smile, batting my eyes. “Morning, Mrs. Jasper. Your hair is beautiful today.”
She knows I’m lying. Her hair has been in the same fried perm style since I was a child. I know she’s heard me and my friends say her hair looks like a rat’s nest. Especially Sy since she’s a cosmetologist. Serves her right for always being such a fucking bitch to me.
Mrs. Jasper’s face turns red and she goes back to the books she’s reading. I can practically see the steam leaving her ears.
Ha!
I stroll through the aisles, getting ramen, spaghetti noodles, spaghetti sauce, and ground beef for some dinner tonight and chicken—easy to cook meals that I don’t have to try too hard with. I don’t know how to cook very well. I do just enough to make sure I don’t starve.
My coupons are ready when I get to the register. Mrs. Jasper always bitches about them not being out and ready for her to scan. I’m ready today.
Mrs. Jasper doesn’t immediately start scanning my products. She keeps reading her stupid book and I start tapping my foot. It’s not like I have somewhere to be, but she’s being super rude.
When she gets to the end of her chapter, she licks her finger to flip the page and dog ears it. I frown at her.
She looks up at me, places her book beside the receipt holder and starts to scan my groceries. “Looks like a lean supper tonight.”
I bristle, but don’t comment anything sarcastic like I want. “It’ll keep me fed,” I say with a nonchalant shrug. She bags my frozen broccoli and I hand her my coupon. “This is good for the next few days.”
It’s Mrs. Jasper’s turn to smile a fake sweet smile at me. “Oh, I’m sorry dear, the coupon machine is broken. Can’t scan nothin’.” She’s a liar. I can tell by how smug her smile is.
Instead of arguing, I nod and slide the useless pieces of paper into my jeans pockets. “No problem. I’ll be back next week with more when the Save-A-Bunch letter comes out.”
Sighing like she’s sad on my behalf, Mrs. Jasper says, “I don’t know when we’ll be gettin’ it fixed. These things take time.”
I frown, but don’t say more—just let her ring me up and pull out my debit card. The groceries don’t cost much, and I would have only saved about two bucks, but that’s two bucks that can go to my savings. I’m so close to having enough for a down payment for a condo in St. Louis. I know a few people there that can put in a good word for a job—I just need to get there.
“Enjoy the rest of your day, hon,” Mrs. Jasper says, a wicked smirk on her lips because she didn’t take my coupons.
“I will. I might stop by the hair salon this week. I could do with a haircut. And Sy promised to re-dye my ends. Maybe straighten my hair too.” I flip my shoulder length hair over my shoulder and glance down at the bright green tips. After a quick examination of the beauty that is my hair, I look at her with a grin. Her smirk falls and she dismisses me by huffing and picking up her book.
I’m not sure why she’s mad at me for her hairstyle. No one told her she had to keep her 1980s stiff perm.
By the time I’m leaving the store, the sun has risen in earnest. It’s a beautiful day, with the sun shining and a few clouds in the sky. In Missouri, you’re thankful when you have a great start to the day like this at the beginning of the summer, even if it is hotter than it should be at eight in the morning.
The nice day helps lift the foul mood Mrs. Jasper put me in, but not by much. Luckily, the garage is closed on weekends, so I plan to go to St. Louis to check out some apartments and see who’s hiring. It’s really just an excuse to drive away from this place and pretend I’ll never be back.
Like that will happen.
As I’m walking to my car, I see a man in gym clothes walking with his phone in the air, looking for good service. If you don’t have one specific cell phone provider, you won’t get much service in this area. It’s almost a dead zone.
I start to walk pass, letting him handle things on his own, but when he meets my eyes, I’m like…fuck. He’s so fucking fine. Even though he looks handsome enough to be on the silver screen, he looks a little rough around the edges, a little dangerous and that makes me come alive. I’ve always been drawn to the bad boys.
