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“No. Don’t be. I’m sorry,” I stammered. “I’m sorry. This just isn’t how it’s going to go. For so many reasons I know don’t even make a lot of sense to me, but they do make sense in my head somehow. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“I’m just a mess and I can’t do this right now, Shelbs. I can’t suddenly be pining after these alphas. I am supposed to be a good student doing what I need to figure out my major and graduate. I’m not meant to just be an omega.”
“I know your mom taught you to think that is such a bad thing, Vera,” whispered Shelby. “But I hope you know it’s not. I love you. Omega and all.”
“I know.” My shoulders slumped.
“And I know you might not want me to say this, but at least think about it. Give them a chance. I may be only a beta, but I can’t imagine someone meeting you and not wanting to get to know you more. Especially if we were fated mates, one of us quickly coming up to our heat… So, it may not be up to you. Not fully anyway. Just think about it.”
That was the problem. It was way too easy to think about the idea of it all and fall into being an omega with an alpha. Like a silly little comfortable dream.
“Can I give you a hug?”
I blinked, realizing there were tears in my eyes. Without answering, I nodded. Shelby got up from where she was leaning against my desk. She wrapped her arms around me the best she could. I leaned in and hugged her back.
She didn’t let go until I pulled away first.
Chapter
Seven
VERA
The weekend after I came home from the alphas’ apartment and talked with Shelby was a complete bust.
After I worked myself up so much, Shelby ended up taking a nap with me in my tiny bed. Whenever she let go, my omega insisted that it was time to go out and find more blankets to act as some kind of comfort when I was alone…
Without my alphas.
I shoved my omega thoughts far out of my head, but it still wasn’t enough.
On Sunday, we forced ourselves to work on class stuff that we put off—Shelby more than I did. Though I still hadn’t declared a major, I still liked to make sure I was at least a week or two ahead on the syllabus. Shelby ordered Chinese food and I gorged myself on vegetable lo mein before forcing myself to eat the fortune cookie that determined my love life was going totake a turn. Shelby was all too pleased when I handed it to her to read.
I was still feeling the aftereffects of the party and greasy food on Monday. For once, I looked like most of the rest of the student population wearing leggings and comfortable sneakers that I didn’t have to worry about getting wet in the rain.
I was almost through the entire day of professors not paying attention to my disheveled state and Shelby texting me that they called an extra meeting for the improv club on campus to “relieve the extra stress of second semester” when I figured I’d head back to my dorm room for a short nap and cereal for dinner.
“Ms. Edwards,” the usually stern voice of my biology professor called.
I paused packing my stuff up from my final lecture of the day. I peeked up over my shoulder, catching the beta woman’s eye that was settled on me.
She rounded the small desk at the front of the room, lifting her voice for me to hear in my seat towards the back. “Would you mind staying for a moment?”
I stuffed my notebook the rest of the way inside my bag. Zipping it closed, I swung the strap over my shoulder and started a slow walk up the aisle. A few others in the lecture who were also taking their time to leave glanced my way. One looked me up and down before I made it to the front.
Standing in front of Dr. Myers, I swallowed.
Her eyes tracked the movement when she looked up from shrugging on her coat. “Oh, don’t worry. You’re not in trouble.”
“Oh.” I mean, of course, I wasn’t. There was no reason for me to be in trouble at all of course.
Yet for some reason, that was exactly where my mind went.
She gave a polite, yet uneasy smile. “I called you up since I took a peek at your grades the other day and noticed that you haven’t declared a major yet.”
I blinked. “Right. I mean, I’m just deciding. I know I need to make a decision soon.”
