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Because I was falling in love with them.
It was so easy to fall in love with them, unlike everything else I forced myself to do in my life so far.
Before I could control myself— what was the point anyway at this rate? — tears leaked from the corners of my eyes.
“Don’t you dare cry,” said Silas. “Stop it.”
“I’m sorry, okay? I’m trying my best here and no matter how hard I try my best isn’t good enough.” It never was.
“And get it through your head that I don’t want you. I will never want you.”
It took a second as I cried already for my mind to fully comprehend what was happening.
“Get out of here now!” He barked at me.
Pure, unfiltered,rejection.
There it was. Once and for all.
I stumbled back at the order, trying to get away only to collapse to my knees.
The unmistakable order I couldn’t comprehend let alone follow through on took my breath away, so much worse than when he corrected his teammate when he’d asked if I was his omega and Silas hastily said no. I heard the horror stories in romance novels and online of when a person was rejected by a scent match, their natural soulmate. But this was worse. So much worse.
It felt as if I would rather my heart just stop beating and give out altogether rather than rage a war against my chest.
I was an omega. There was no denying that. Years of doing so only got so far, but I never felt more omega than I did right now in front of the alpha who looked at me with a grimace on his face as if I was nothing.
“Omega. Stop.” His eyebrows bent inwards as he looked at me, likely expecting me to yell right back at him. I wanted to. I did, but I couldn’t.
I was much too hot, my skin flaring as if I was having some sort of allergic reaction. The sun that was peeking through gray clouds was too bright and his voice too loud and I couldn’t handle it.
I shook my head, my shoulders hunching.
“Vera?”
I shook my head again and kept shaking it.
I couldn’t breathe. Why should I? I was just going to go through my next heat alone and I was going to be alone because no one even cared what or who I was ever.
I barely even cared.
Not until now.
Blinking, dark splotches peppered my vision. Everything was too much too much?—
And I was never enough.
“Vera!”
Chapter
Twenty-One
JACOB
Fear bled through the bond like a cold sweat.
One minute I was changing, and the next Leeson’s head snapped up to mine. But I already started to move. Bag thrown over my shoulder, I was up the stairs from the locker rooms and quickly beelining it outside before I even realized where I was going. It didn’t matter.
