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The events which happened a few minutes ago flash through my mind. I saw Hiroshi when I was with Hana and Yuki. I was dancing with both of them and I remember thinking that he was a good mover, and if only Diego could see us now. Then for some reason I thought I saw Diego in the crowd, then realized it was his contact. So, I made sure to get closer to Hiroshi so he could tell Diego. No doubt he told him to come spy on me.
Afterward, I didn’t feel proud of myself for wanting to make Diego jealous, so I told Hiroshi that I wanted to go to the bathroom. He said he’ll help me and then before I knew it, everyone was leaving and I fell to the ground.
Why can’t I get rid of whatever it is that keeps going up and down my face?
It’s as if my hands are glued to the floor. I try to move them. I try to see, but my vision is blurred. I close my eyes and then open them again, this time I try to focus and then I notice the slippery thing that is against my skin isn’t an insect, but at first I thought it was a snake. I’ve seen them one too many times in my village in Cobeña, but none of them would be so bold to go over my face.
“There, there,” a voice is saying.
¡Dios mío!1
My focus allows me to see what’s really happening to me. My throat is dry, and my voice has disappeared along with the strength to move. Hiroshi’s long, lengthy cock is tracing up and down my face. I can’t move. I know I’m in the public bathroom of a club, or so I think? The light above his head is shining and it’s as if he’s smiling at me.
All I want to do is throw up, but I can’t and tears start to build up in my eyes, as I think about what is going to happen next. Hiroshi moves his cock from my face to my neck. I use every force I can to move my head.
Nothing.
I’m crying inside, as his cock is moving from my neck around my breasts. Someone help me.
Please …
The little energy I have in me is screaming, and the more I do it, the more he seems aroused and then he starts to mock me as my eyes shift from side to side. The only thing that seems to be able to move. He starts to undo my dress.
No, por favor.2
My mind races to what is please in Japanese or even English. My mind scrambles like eggs, because I know I’m going to be raped. I know the cock which was on my face, then my neck, will soon be inside of me. I’ve only been with one man, and now thesecond one will be an assault, and the worst part of the story is that I can’t move. Not one inch.
Then there’s a loud thump at the door as I lie on the floor naked. It scares him as he jumps back. No one’s talking, but then there’s this big bang and I close my eyes, not wanting to witness anything more. I know the sound too well. I’ve been hunting with mi padre and mi abuela in our fields in the village. It’s the sound of a shotgun, and I’m really going to die tonight.
No more is Hiroshi laughing as I open my eyes wondering what’s going on now. He’s putting his fat cock in his pants and then trying to escape through the window. If this is my last day on Earth, then I want forgiveness for all I’ve done and for coming here tonight.
“You fucking—” Diego shouts as he races toward Hiroshi and grabs his legs as I’m lying on the floor, too weak to stand up.
I watch faintly as he shoves him to the ground and punches him repeatedly. Flesh meets bones and the sounds it makes can be heard over the faint music. Either I’m fainting or the music comes to a halt. Diego’s contact doesn’t say a word, but puts something over me. I can’t turn my head to see.
“¡Voy a matarte el puto!3” Diego shouts, as I can hear the crunch of bones. I don’t hear a sound from Hiroshi. All I know is that I can feel myself moving, as if I’m being lifted off the ground. That’s the last thing I see before, once again, I’m greeted with blackness. But I don’t have fear in me like I did before because Diego is here for me. And I know, no matter what, I’m going to be safe.
My throat feels dry, and I try to move my limbs but it feels as if it’s too much effort to do that. There’s a warmth in my hand, and I realize as I try to move my fingers that someone is holding it.
“You’re awake.” Diego smiles as I try and focus to meet his eyes. I can see he’s looking at me, but I can’t quite see his face.
“Diego,” I say faintly, not recognizing my own voice.
“Don’t try to move. I’m here. I’ll look after you.”
I nod my head, but I’m not sure if I’m moving it, but this is what I intend to do.
“I was scared. The doctor couldn’t quite figure out what you’d taken, but your vitals are a lot better than yesterday so they released you.”
“Adonde?”
“The hospital. Just rest. I’ll let the doctor know you are awake. So, at least we know you’re getting better.” I think maybe my ears are deceiving me, because I’m pretty sure Diego said yesterday. The thirst I once had disappears and then it dawns on me, as I can see as clear as day, I’m on a drip. This is what is on my arm, I can feel it, the blanket wrapped around my body as I lay like a statue.
It’s as if all the memories of that night flash through my mind, like the limo ride with Diego, and how he told me that he’d preferred if he’d married Belén and I went out of my way to upset him. I knew he had an important meeting and I lashed out at him because I was scared that as soon as the business deal’s over then so is our time here. I’ve loved the time we’ve spent here, and at first when Diego turned off his phone I knew it was out of character, but it meant that he was giving me his full attention.
Me.
I’d been selfish and regretted being mean to him, but then as soon as he said that to me, it put me in my place. I knew once the meeting was over he would throw me out with the trash. It also meant that maybe, just maybe, he’d been using me all along and all the things he’d said and done he didn’t mean any of it, and I want to ask him. Tell him what was on my mind that night, but I can’t as once again I can feel myself drifting, and then I smile as I see a friendly face.
