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“What was that?” Ocean turns on me, her eyes throwing daggers.
I take her hand in mine and lead her to the private conference space we’d been using. “We need to talk.”
“Ezra,” she whisper-shouts my name, while twisting her hand in my grip, “there is nothing to say.”
We reach the room and I push us both inside, before closing the door and locking it. Her eyes wide.
“Are you out of your mind?”
“I might be. I feel like the longer we keep going around in circles, the more unstable I become.” The restlessness inside my body has been flipping and churning since I first saw her again. I could care less if anyone knows about this or saw me drag her in here. I don’t give a damn what anyone says, what they think, what all of the music industry will think or say. Ocean Heart is mine. She’s always been meant for me. The continuous need I have to feel her lips on mine, to shove her against the door and taste her in all the ways I want to while she screams my name as she comes has reached its limits.
Her shoulders round and her arms fold across her body like she’s protecting herself from me. “There really is nothing else to say. I know you’re back. We’ll obviously be crossing paths. You said you’re sorry and you didn’t want to leave me, but it doesn’t change the fact that you did. If you’re looking for forgiveness, fine, I can forgive you, but I can’t forget.”
I stare at her wondering where I’ve gone wrong in making her understand. “Ocean, I can’t keep crossing paths with you or letting you think I’m okay with seeing you around in the business.”
“Then what do you want from me, Ezra?” Her voice shakes and tears fill her eyes.
“I want you.” I eat up the distance between us, needing to feel her skin on mine. My hands slide up her arms, glide over the sensitive skin on her neck and cradle her face. I don’t give her the option to focus on anything else but me. “Baby, I want you.I’ve always wanted you, even when I shouldn't have. Even when you kissed me and told me you loved me, I wanted you. It killed me to walk away from you, Ocean, but I had to. I had already pushed the boundary of my contract as your handler. Your uncle was asking questions and making noise to BNE that you were getting preferential treatment.” Her eyes widen with the truth. Deep down I think she knows she did and that she still does. Everything I do is for this girl. I live and breathe Ocean Heart.
“If I had stayed, I would have devoured you in that hotel. I almost did. Taking my lips off yours was the second hardest thing I’ve ever done. It would have been all over, Ocean. I would have ruined your career because those officers, your security…they would have come running back into that room thinking I was murdering you from how loud you would have been screaming from underneath me.”
Her knees shake and I manage to push her against the wall, taking all her body weight against mine. She feels fucking amazing, all soft and pliant in my arms. My thumbs skate across her bottom lip, her cheeks, her chin, memorizing every part of her.
“I wouldn’t have cared.” She breathes the words, and every little breath is a small touch of her lips against mine.
I grunt in response. “I would have. I broke my rules for you. I wasn’t about to let you break everything you worked so hard for, Ocean. I wanted more for you than that. I couldn’t be the one to destroy you, not when I loved you so much. Love you. Because I love you, Ocean, so much it's painful not being in your presence. I waited for two years for the right time to have you again.”
The tears fall down over her cheeks and soak into my skin. I groan and press my forehead to hers. I tilt my head so that our lips nearly touch, I’m almost kissing her.
“Please, let me back in, Ocean. I’m sorry I hurt you. I promise I will make it up to you every day, forever. I’ll never leave you alone again.”
She hiccups on a sob, and her entire frame shakes in my hold. I take her arms and wind them around my neck, giving her my strength, nudging her to hold on to me.
“I’m scared, Ezra. I don’t think I can do that again. I loved you so much; you were so deeply embedded in my life, my every waking moment. Losing you broke me. Having you reject me felt like you plunged a knife in my chest. You left me alone and vulnerable.”
I shake my head in denial, because no, this is not what was meant to happen. I set up everything I could to protect her. I never wanted her to feel the pain she’s describing.
“I’m sorry. Forgive me, please. Let me make it up to you. Tell me what happened and I’ll fix it. Can we please start over?”
My gaze drops to her lips once more and I can’t hold back. I brush my lips against her softer ones. My mouth teases hers, tasting, dipping down until she’s kissing me back. I slide my hand behind her head, fusing my mouth to hers, kissing her like I’ve dreamed about for the past two years. She moans in surprise, her hands gripping my forearms before moving to my shoulders. I kiss her like my life depends on it because without Ocean, nothing else matters.
Ocean breaks our kiss first and I watch helpless as her eyes go from soft and horny to pissed and then blank. My heart sinks in my chest. “We can’t do this.” She drops her hands from me, and I reluctantly take a step back.
“Ocean–”
“No.” She takes another step away from me. “I. This won’t work. I’m not the same girl I was two years ago, Ezra. I’ve changed, we’ve changed. I learned to make it without you. We can’t go back. There’s too much damage.”
She turns to leave, but I have to touch her one more time. My hand closes around hers on the handle. “I will fix it, Ocean. I won’t stop giving you everything you deserve. I love you.”
She inhales before yanking the handle down and escaping the room and me. I’m missing something, something important that I’m starting to think Kyle had been keeping from me. Her words, the lost and broken way she looked at me, it goes deeper than what happened in that hotel room. I can feel it. I can read Ocean like a book, front to cover, with my eyes closed. She is hiding something.
ME: We need to talk.
Kyle: I’ll drop her off then I’ll be over.
He’s not surprised, which means he knows. He’s held vital information from me for two years. I’m glad he’s loyal to her, but part of him protecting her is making me aware of everything about her while I protect her in the shadows.
It’sdark by the time Kyle finally arrives at my office. The tense lines of his body make me aware that what he is about to say could piss me off.
