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Chapter One
Malcolm
I know what my clan wants from me but I don’t want to give it to them so easily. It angers me that they continuously are trying to make decisions for me like I do not know what I’m doing. I have been working hard to achieve a lot of my goals to make sure that my tribe is the best in the entire world but that’s also hard to achieve when I have people behind me whispering behind my back at the fact that I have not found a Queen.
It’s not even the fact that I haven’t found a Queen, I just don’t know where she is at right now. It might sound very stupid but there was a girl that I used to love. She was basically my everything and it didn’t matter what was happening in my life right then and there, she always had my back. It made me feel good about myself, like I could actually accomplish something. Sometimes that is a little easier said than done because I have been talking about how I would love to meet her again and make her my Queen, but my advisors have said that is impossible.
I don’t know why they screamed at me that it was impossible when they did not KNOW her. They do not know what we havebeen through or how much I especially care about her. They can try to understand and keep making excuses towards me as to why someone else would be a better fit, but I’m going to have to keep reminding them in the long run, it’s going to be MY decision on who I make my Queen.
I’m the leader of the Golden Sun clan, a clan of fierce lion-shifters who have been ruling over this land for as long as I can remember. The lineage goes back in my family’s history for many generations, straight back to when the first shifters came into emergence. I never tried to talk back to my family or act like I was better than them because I knew that I wasn’t. Everything that I have done has been for the greater good of my family’s lifestyle and I will continuously promote that as well for as long as I shall live.
I don’t quite care what anyone has to say about it either because I was raised by a fair but firm ruler. He knew what the clan needed, what kind of leader that could rule them. He was strict but he was also kind. He made sure that nobody was left behind and he made sure that everyone was well taken care of. If there was ever someone in need, he was the first to offer his hand in assistance. I strive to be exactly like him because he is really everything that I could have ever asked for. I can probably already assume what was going through his head every time that my grandfather looked at me because I was nothing like my father.
My father was an evil man, and he would have destroyed everything that the clan had been built under if he would have came into rule. I hate saying that about my father because I would really like to think that he isn’t that big of a piece of shit but he has continuously proven me wrong time and time again, much more than I would even like to admit. I keep telling myself that I need to just keep in mind that he was raised differentlybut I also know that my grandfather really didn’t do anything to warrant being treated the way he had been.
It pained me to see it when my grandfather ended up passing after a duel with my father. He won, pinning my father and exiling him, but his wounds were far too great that he wasn’t able to heal himself. I remember standing by his side, hoping and praying that somehow, he would make it through. I didn’t know then that he already knew his death was coming but he made me promise that I would find a good Queen to stand by my side. A woman who was strong but fair. There was only ONE person who came to mind when I thought about someone like that.
I sigh in annoyance as I gaze down at the paperwork on my desk, loathing this part of the job. I swear every time I look down, more magically appears and it’s just driving me crazy. I shake my head back and forth to try and clear my thoughts, going over peace treaties and applications for asylum. My clan has always been open to accepting other kinds of shifters or rogues, it just kind of depended on what happened in their past and why they want to be here. Thankfully I haven’t had too many weirdos who definitely didn’t need to be here, but I kind of kept that to myself a little bit.
If an application was rejected, they needed to move on, but I had a house on the outskirts of the territory where they could stay until I made a decision. I always discussed each and every person with my most trusted advisors because I honestly feel like they give me a fresh set of eyes and a new understanding. We have had to turn people away before and it always irked me that we had to do it because sometimes, it wasn’t their fault that they had to be turned away but due to the safety of my pack, I had no choice. I always had to keep reminding myself that I’m making the toughest decisions but they have to be made.
I move to the next document and I freeze when I see the name. Eleanor Corbin. I flip straight to the photo, wondering if itis actually her. She left a few years ago, I didn’t think she would change this much. I see her smiling face looking right back at me, making my heart practically stutter in my chest because I had no idea how much I could be feeling in this short amount of time. It made me ache for more, to crave more, and I just kept staring down at her paperwork, wondering why she needed to reach asylum. It pisses me off at what I read, how she was abandoned and is doing everything to find a place where she belongs.
How she wants to come back to the one place she had called home if we would accept her.
I don’t even need to go to my advisors on this, I have already made my decision.
Chapter Two
Eleanor
“Thank you all so much for your support!” I murmur into the camera, seeing the live feed from my computer as I do my best, “It has been a long and struggling road a I have been trying to find a home to live. Your suggestions were correct when you told me to go back to the place that I did call home. It makes me smile when I see how much I have been missed because there are so many people here that I totally forgot about unfortunately. I wish that things could have been different though and I didn’t need to leave back then but I didn’t have much of a choice. I kept telling myself that the right thing to do would be to walk away and not think about a thing but I know now that it isn’t the right thing to do. I need to face my fears head on… I might even be able to see HIM again.”
It makes my heart flutter at the mere thought of seeing him again in my life. I had no idea that I would get to see him again after my parents forbade me from talking to him anymore since he made it public that he loved me and wanted me to be Queen. My parents continuously looked down on me and since I was tooyoung to tell them to fuck off, I just ended up accepting their wishes and following them. I would continue to be miserable in the passing days but it made me so angry when I learned that they only took me away just to abandon me anyways. I didn’t know how my family could be so cruel, how they could just turn their backs on me like that.
I wanted to scream and shout at them. I wanted to demand answers and ask them why they made me leave behind everything that I have ever known or loved just because they were jealous of my accomplishments. It’s not my fault that they are not going anywhere in life because they chose not to be. It made my blood boil at the mere thought of it, hating the fact that I had to continuously give up everything that I ever wanted just because I believed that I was doing the right thing as a daughter.
Now, I don’t give a damn because I’ve been struggling for the past year after they left me high and dry. It’s a good thing that I had savings because I would have been on the streets already if I hadn’t. I know now that everything happens for a reason and I’m going to make it out of here one way or another, I just hate the fact that it turned out this way. I totally thought that I wouldn’t get screwed over so much by my parents because I was their only child. They should have just loved me.
Now, I have my own little room in the pack house but I have yet to see him. I don’t blame him though because I totally believe that he has just ignored me and doesn’t care if we’re here or not. I can’t say that I really blame him though considering the fact that I had rejected him all those years ago, but I totally thought that he would have given me some credit and understood. I’m not going to try to talk to him about anything though because I have these feelings it’s not going to matter. He’s not going to understand so much and it would have been for nothing. I really don’t want to make a fool out of myself, I just want to be happy.
That’s what I keep telling myself and that’s what I’m going to live by. If I keep letting him into my mind or even the past, I have a feeling I’m just going to regret it in the long run and that’s not what I want to be dealing with right now. I keep thinking that maybe if I seek him out, we could probably talk, but that also makes me worry about the fact that maybe he doesn’t want anything to do with me. Just maybe, he might throw me to the curb and then I will really be on the short end of the stick.
I try not to think too much about it as I end the stream, trying to ignore my fans who are desperately screaming at me to seek him out and win him back. I don’t even know if I’m what he’s into anymore because he’s a bit older than me, but I don’t think it really matters. I don’t think he isn’t with anyone just because of me… I think that he just hasn’t chosen a Queen for personal reasons. I shouldn’t get my hopes up.
Just as I’m about to get out of Instagram, that’s when I notice I have a message from someone who looks quite familiar. I click on it and that’s when I see it is him. My lips parted in shock as I never expected to see a message from him. He’s even a follower of mine. Why hadn’t I noticed this? I’m more surprised at his message though because I totally thought he would just ignore me the minute that he learned it was me.
From Malcolm ~ Hello,Eleanor. It has been many years since we last saw each other and I am happy to see that you decided to come home. I’m sure it wasn’t an easy decision to come to at all but I’m happy to see that you actually came back to the place you grew up. A lot of people decide to leave and not come back because this just isn’t the place for them anymore. I guess I really can’t blame them. There were times that I just thought about leaving too but this place needed me too much. I knew I would regret it if I left.
Wow,he’s not holding anything back. I’m sure he’s not trying to make me feel bad about the situation of me having to leave but I really didn’t have much of a choice back then. If I confessed everything to him about the real reason I had to leave, I’m not so sure what he would have done. Would he have punished my parents? Would he have called me a liar? Would he have even been on my side? There are too many questions with few answers, that much is clear, and I do feel like I just need to take it one step at a time.
I just don’t know what I’m going to do about him though.
From Malcolm~ I was wondering if you would like to meet up for lunch. I would really like to see you again and talk after all this time. If you don’t feel like it, I completely understand, but I promise that you will not regret it. That much I can tell you.
I nervously bitedown on my bottom lip because I honestly have no idea what to think about this. I have been eagerly awaiting meeting him once again even if it would be from afar but I never expected him to message me outright and ask to see me. At first, I kind of thought it would just be a joke and that he didn’t want to actually see me, but something inside of me is telling me that he is being a hundred percent serious. It makes my heart flutter at the thought because now I know that no matter what, I’m going to see him again.
It’s just up to me if that’s what I really want.
