AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Brag all you want.” I leave the table, almost glad for an excuse to go after she’s kicked my ass all morning. “I’ll grab a fresh deck when I’m out, and then we’ll see who’s bragging.”
“Ooh, see if there are any paperbacks at the store,” she asks tentatively when I shoot her a glare. “I’ve already been through most of what you found tucked around the cabin.” Her gaze falls on the small stack of books sitting on the coffee table. I’ve also been through most of them if only to distract myself from the increasingly fraught situation I’ve placed myself in.
“I’ll keep an eye out,” I grunt out as I put on my coat, and her smile leaves me, determined to stop at a bookstore if I have to. So long as she keeps smiling, and the warmth in my chest reminds me why I still haven’t taken her back to Long Island as the family thinks I should.
It’s bizarre but no less true. I’m a different man when I leave the cabin to head out for supplies than when we first arrived.
I have to shake my head and laugh at the corny direction my thoughts have taken as I pull away from the cabin on a bitterly cold afternoon. She’s watching from the window, and part of me wants to slam on the brakes and stay here rather than risk leaving her alone, knowing she could easily run away.
Not so easily. I have to remind myself of that, and it’s the only thing that keeps me moving. After she was struck by that car, it’s still painful for her to get around. How do I know? Aside from the way she winces and gasps, especially after she’s been sitting or lying down for a while, she lets me help her. That’s how I know she’s suffering. Rather than shove me away or pretend she’s stronger than she is, she allows me to walk her around the cabin while she leans against me. It must grate on her ass to admit she’s anything less than strong and fully capable.
Mobility issues, combined with the fact that she has no idea where we are, would make it highly improbable for an intelligent person like her to make a stupid choice like running away. If she’s going to survive, she needs me. She needs to stay where she is.
What a shame the risk of taking her with me far outweighs the risk of leaving her here.
Dressed in the clothes I found in the dresser and closet, I blend in easily once I reach the shopping district roughly equidistant from the cabin and the ski resorts further up the mountain. We believe in preparing for all possibilities, including a long stay, which has come in handy.
I can’t afford to take long on my errands and risk exposure. With that in mind, I keep a sharp eye out as I roll through the parking lot in front of a grocery store. There are a few plates from New York and several from New Jersey. I don’t recognize any of them. My father must have guys out looking for me by now, but there’s nothing around to set off my instincts.
Twenty minutes later, I leave the store with a bag of groceries in each arm, careful to go about my business without attracting attention but always watching in case there’s already someone around here looking for me. By the time I’m on the road again, my pulse has picked up speed, and I find myself making a conscious effort to stay close to the speed limit. That’s all I need, getting pulled over at a time like this.
It isn’t so much that I’m in a hurry to make sure Emilia doesn’t try to run. It’s more that I can’t wait to get back to her. That’s why I’m in a hurry. She’s what I crave. The forty minutes we’ve been apart have been too long already. This is what she’s done to me and who she’s turned me into. Or maybe I’m who I’ve turned myself into since I was already addicted to her well before I killed for her.
By the time I turn off the main road and onto the narrow, half-hidden lane leading to the cabin, my heart’s ready to burst out of my chest. According to her, the one thing she craves more than anything right now is spaghetti, garlic bread, and ice cream, all three of which are waiting for her in the back seat. She’ll smile and be happy, all because of me.
I can’t wait.
As usual, I park behind the cabin, then carry the bags around the cabin and through the front door. “They had chocolate peanut butter and cookie dough,” I call out as I step inside and kick the door closed behind me, then cross the room to leave the bags on the kitchen table. “I wasn’t sure which you’d like better, so I got both.”
That’s how long it takes me to realize I’m alone in the cabin. The bathroom door is open, and the room is empty. Same with the bedroom.
Motherfucker. Incredible how little it takes for my buoyant mood to crash.
“Emilia?” I dart to the front door, fling it open, stepping onto the small porch with my head on a swivel. Did somebody come for her while I was gone? It was always a possibility, yet there was no sign of a struggle in the cabin. She would have fought like hell—unless she was wounded, but then blood would be left behind.
She’s gone. She left on her own.
A sick feeling slams into me in time with the spike of adrenaline that floods my system. I want to run, hunt, catch, and drag her back. But I can’t go off half-cocked. I know that much, even as my head spins and betrayal soaks into my marrow. For three days, she’s pretended to soften up toward me. We’ve spent time reading books left around the cabin, playing cards, and watching television. We’ve developed a sort of wary camaraderie, all for her to stab me in the fucking back like the traitor she’s always been. How could I let myself forget?
I rush back into the cabin, the groceries forgotten in favor of opening the bottom drawer beneath the sink to reveal a safe where I’ve stored the weapons to keep them away from her. The Glock is waiting for me, and I withdraw it, tucking it into my waistband and growling as I imagine using it on her the way I should’ve done in the first place.
I stand and turn, prepared to hunt to my dying breath if that’s what it takes. Emilia couldn’t have gotten far, but with no idea which direction she was headed, it could have taken a while. She’ll be lucky if she freezes to death out there. It would be a more merciful death than the one I have in mind.
She lied to me and pretended we were in this together, sleeping side by side, all for her to run. Being with me is apparently worse than freezing to death with the smell of approaching snow in the air.
The front door sits open, and I head that way, teeth gritted, my head pounding with every step I take. Suddenly, she appears like magic, slowly and awkwardly climbing the steps up to the porch with a bundle of sticks and twigs in her arms. When she sees me, she drops them at my feet with a weary groan. “You’re finally back. You have no idea what I went through to gather this.”
The fog of rage that’s wrapped itself around my skull won’t allow her words to penetrate. “Where the fuck were you?” I bark out, taking her by the arm and hauling her in close.
She gasps, her head snapping back, eyes wide. “What does it look like? You left me here all by myself, and the fire went dead. There was no wood to add to it. I was freezing in there. What was I supposed to do?”
I didn’t bring in more wood. I was supposed to take care of her, yet I overlooked that simple chore. Frustration with myself translates to fury at the entire situation before I shake her, snarling. “You were told to stay inside!”
The fear and confusion in her expression harden into something far sharper and fiercer before she bares her teeth in a snarl of her own. “Hello? I had no idea where you were going, no idea how long it would take since I don’t have a clue where we are, and I could see my fucking breath in there,” she snaps. “Sorry if I thought I might walk around, try to gather what I could. Do you know how painful it was?” As it is, she’s standing on one foot, with only the toes of her right foot touching the floorboards. “You left me here to freeze to death for all I know, then you get an attitude with me?”
“Poor you,” I growl out before pulling her into the cabin, the wood forgotten in favor of something far more important—making sure I reestablish the rules around here. For both of us. I was too busy floating around like a fucking lovesick idiot to take care of the essentials, and I could have ended up losing her. What if she’d gotten lost? What if she’d been injured again?
I’ve lost perspective, and it’s unforgivable.
