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Chapter One
Miriana
The soft glow in my home office bathes the room in a comforting light, creating a snug and reassuring environment. It's a calculated choice, intended to relax and put any visitor at ease. It's lesson number one from grad school: establish a safe, invincible ambiance.
Every day, I work with people who are on a quest to find significance in their lives. Seated across from me is Sarah, a young woman grappling with a challenging period in her life. Her words hang heavy in the air as she spills out her anxieties and concerns. Despite her efforts, she can't seem to break free from her shell, and sadly, the negative impact of her family doesn't make her job any easier. This is because she is such a generous spirit, she puts others before herself. We've been chipping away at this for months, and every little progress feels like a monumental win. Except when her cousin rings her up just to ridicule and intimidate her, further eroding her self-confidence, and her parents do the rest.
“Miriana, I truly don't know what to do. I feel like I'm wandering aimlessly.” She sighs, gazing at me with eyes brimming with sorrow. “Everything seems futile. I've turned my life upside down. I have a job I adore but it never seems to not be enough for my family.”
“Is it for you?”
“Yes.” She reclines back into her chair. “Would you think I'm crazy if I say that I feel ecstatic, accomplished, invincible, and driven when I'm out of the house?”
“And then what?”
“I get home and before the front door even swings shut, I feel drained and start questioning myself.”
I study her intently, attempting to untangle the intricacies of her emotions. “Sarah, I understand all of this can feel incredibly overwhelming, and I can say this toxicity isn't beneficial for you. We can tackle these issues and find a way to your happiness, but it has to start with you.”
“Yesterday, I told my folks I'm moving out to live on my own,” she confesses with a determination that takes me by surprise.
I grin at her, nodding. “This is more than a step, it's a giant leap. How'd your folks take it?” Her smile fades and her eyes well up with tears. She buries her face in her hands, and all I can do is watch her crumble again. “You see, Sarah, not everyone takes kindly to change. For some, it's a reason to ridicule or even resent. But you gotta put yourself first for once.”
“I know, but they make me feel like I'm an ungrateful child, disrespecting them. It makes me feel guilty.”
I bite the inside of my cheek, holding my tongue. I've always despised emotional manipulation. It's a pain I've experienced and detest with every fiber of my being. “Look at me.” My protective instincts kick in, and while it might be unprofessional at this point, I couldn't care less.
Sarah looks up, surprised by my tone.
“You're a fantastic woman and you should take pride in that. You've given your family more than they ever deserved and now it's time to stand on your own.” I pause, handing her a box of tissues. “The problem ain't you, Sarah. You're not weak, they just make you think you are.”
“Why? What did I do to deserve this?” she asks between sobs, dabbing at her tears.
“Nothing. You've just spoiled them too much.” It's not my place to scold her, and I won't. She's got a heart of gold and, unfortunately, the parasites have found the perfect leverage. Sarah's eyes widen as she finally realizes what I'm getting at. “Do you get it now?”
“No way, Miriana.” She shakes her head as I see her get lost in her thoughts. “But they're my family.”
“And yet, you're the one who told me you've finished paying off the mortgage. You cover all the bills and even fund their vacations.”
She nods, meeting my gaze again. “And every time I buy something for myself or want to go to the beach for the weekend, they make me feel terrible.” Tears streak her face, which she quickly wipes away. “I'm just a cash cow to them. That's why they don't want me to leave.”
I'm proud she finally sees it. As our conversation continues, my cell phone buzzes quietly on the desk but I focus on my patient. “Sarah, I think you're finally ready to take control of your life,” I tell her, trying to refocus on the session. “You've got everything you need to be happy. Just remember, don't let anyone take advantage of you. Being generous and kind is great, but there have to be boundaries.”
“What if they meddle in my life?”
“You're the only one who has the power to determine who and how much influence they have in your life. Be your own leader and make choices confidently.”
“I try to, because I deserve that.”
And she truly does. She just needs to prioritize herself a bit more, or else it's like a dog chasing its tail. Not everyone is capable of setting their boundaries, and the more drained a person, the better they seem to function.
Time flies and, when our session wraps up, I send Sarah off with a reassuring smile. If she continues to believe in herself, she will go far, and I wish her the best.
My cell phone buzzes making me glance at the screen and, seeing a message, I can’t help but smile.
Kyle: Put on that little red dress and meet me at the Royal at seven p.m. Love you.
My eyes light up with delight. Five years of marriage, and he still knows how to surprise me with his tenderness.
