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“Not for me, it won’t,” he said before stalking toward the library door. “We deploy in one hour. Be ready,” he added over his shoulder as he left the room.
3
MAGNET
I’d come within a hair’s breadth of admitting to Schön why I reacted the way I had. If I hadn’t bitten my tongue against the confession, I would’ve been forced to recuse myself from the op.
When Verity suggested she help apply the hair dye that would be part of my disguise, the first thing my mind had conjured was Schön, standing behind me, her breasts pressed against my back, her fingers woven in my hair.
No doubt, the look on my face had been one of mortification, given my body’s natural response to picturing such a scene. I was immediately hard as stone with nowhere to hide the lower half of my body.
Deciphering Verity’s reaction when Schön had stormed out of the solarium proved impossible. Was it pity she felt for me? Or Schön? Maybe it was for both of us. Rather than engage, I’d left the room, closed the door, and leaned up against the wall in the hallway, trying to get myself together before I apologized.
Once I reached the situation room, Schön wasn’t in sight.
“Did you see where she went?” I asked Zeppelin.
“Library with Nem,” he said without my needing to explain who I meant. I’d opened the door in time to hear Nemesis ask what “the problem” was.
Schön’s response angered me. “I don’t believe the Albanian task force commander shares your confidence in my qualifications.”
Did I have the right to feel indignant? I was the one who’d reacted badly.
I had two choices. I could confess, thus ruining any chance that Schön and I could continue working together. Or I could turn things around and spin it that Schön’s response was unprofessional.
I’d chosen the low road. It was a wanker move, designed to get what I wanted without having to admit that I, like many men she’d encountered thus far in her career, saw her in a purely sexual way. Except that wasn’t the only way I saw her. Not even close. Could I admit any of it when we were about to deploy?
Instead, it was about damage control.I’dbroken her down, and I would be the one to build her back up by resuming my role as her commander and mentor.
As I left the library, I told myself it was imperative I curb my physical attraction to her. It needed to end immediately. It was a mindset I had the power to muster. I’d overcome far more difficult challenges in my career.
I wason my way out of the main residence, intending to head to the cottage where I stayed while in Shere, when Verity stepped in front of me.
“Yes?” I asked.
“We need to finish our discussion about your disguise.”
“Right.”
“Will Schön be helping?”
I shook my head. “I can handle it.”
“Dying your hair is harder than you think,” said Zep, joining the conversation.
“Sod off,” I muttered. “Um, not you, Verity.”
She smiled. “I knew you weren’t speaking to me. Either way, I’ve put together a kit with instructions. Let me know if you have questions.” She handed me a bag before walking away.
“Are you all right?” Zep asked.
“I’ll be fine.”
“I heard Schön quit.”
“You heard wrong, not that you should’ve heard anything at all.” It burned me up that there was chatter about my team.
“Nemesis discussed it with me privately, given I had a similar experience.”
