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“I didn’t think it would end up with us here, no,” he said.
That was close enough to saying he regretted it to leave a sting. “You might not believe me, but I wouldn’t have done it if I’d realized.”
“I believe you,” he said, pulling on his shirt.
“But it doesn’t matter because it’s done.” That was what he was thinking. I could practically hear the regret in his voice.
He stood unnaturally still, looking over the expanse of the lake but not really seeming to be here at all. He finally said, “It’s not you. It wasn’t supposed to be anyone.”
Not you. I’d heard that one before. It was okay because it wasn’t supposed to have been him, either. Even after I lost everything, I’d imagined things would settle down and I’d eventually find someone normal and go have a regular life. This wasn’t supposed to be where I ended up, my life a shell of what I’d imagined, the dream of murder being the only thing that kept me going. I had more regrets than hopes and dreams at this point.
Fully clothed, he walked back over.
“Before we head back, we need to clear up something else. The situation has changed. I don’t know how much time we have before Herrick comes looking for us. You follow my orders at all times. The amount of power you’re wielding now is not like before, and we need to get a grasp on it now.”
He was standing there as if I’d been the one waiting around, doing nothing on purpose and looking as arrogant as ever while he tried to lecture me.
Instead of stepping away, I closed the gap.
“I didn’t finish the transition to become your soldier. I did it to gain freedom and control. I’m not going to be your yes woman. And I’m not the one who was dawdling and doing who knows what for the last week.” By the time I was finished, I was actually stabbing him in the chest with my finger.
“Let’s not paint the past a different color now. You finished the transition because you were in a rage and wanted vengeance.”
“Fine. I wanted vengeance. The end point is the same. I didn’t sign up to be your lackey.”
“You want vengeance? It comes at a cost. You don’t know what you’re doing. Herrick’s greatest gift is sapping the strength of his enemies. He drains them. I caught him by surprise when I came for you. He didn’t realize how strong you were. It won’t happen again. He’ll be ready next time.”
“So will I.”
“How will you be ready when you have no idea what you’re doing?”
“I just will be. Now, if you're finally ready to go back, let’s go.”
“You are so stubborn.”
“And what are you?” I kept walking, not caring if he did try to tackle me. I’d practice with him.
We made it back without saying another word to each other.
After entering the room, we both walked around to the same side of the bed.
“I sleep on this side.” I pointed to the left.
“So do I.” He shed the rest of his clothing until he was standing there naked and then climbed into bed, on the left side I’d just claimed.
At least with the blanket over his lower half I could try speaking again.
“Why can’t you be a gentleman and take the floor?” I whispered.
“Because I’m not, and you made this situation, not me. If you have an aversion to the bed you made,youcan sleep on the floor.”
“I don’t have any pajamas.”
“They aren’t going to waste a sleep shirt on someone who has been recently mated.”
“Why… Forget it.” I better make an effort to get a sunburn tomorrow to hide all this blushing, or I’d be giving him my back five times a day at this rate. “Where are your shirts?”
“I don’t have many with me. You’re not getting one to sleep in.”
