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“Five car pileup that started right next to me. Saw it in my rearview. Ice storms are crazy, man.” His accent was Jamaican, just thick enough to make his words a little musical.
I wiped my eyes. I refused to start sobbing in front of this friendly man. He wouldn’t know that my tears were for the best reason possible. I was getting my daughter back.
He chattered on over the music for an entire ride, lonely perhaps, happy to have an audience for his tales of driving in the big city. I did my best to be polite, but my mind, my attention, raced far ahead of the car, to the apartment across town where my baby was waiting for me.
I hadn’t asked yet how he’d found her, or where. I hadn’t asked who took her. All of that was secondary to knowing thatshe was safe, that she was protected, and that I would soon have her in my arms again.
When we reached Gregor’s building, I was surprised by its quiet elegance, it had clean, modern lines, lots of light, mostly concrete, steel, and glass. Each one of the apartments took up half the floor, with a hallway bisecting them. I got out, tipped the driver, and nearly slipped on a patch of black ice hurrying down the walkway.
Careful,I told myself.Don’t break your damn neck just steps away from seeing your baby again.
I called up, And Gregor buzzed me in. I took the elevator, and it took ten million years to arrive. On the short ride up, I paced the few steps back and forth while my nerves hummed inside me until I shook.
Gregor’s door was steel, like the others. I knocked on it hastily, wary of the empty hallway.
Gregor opened the door. He smiled with relief to see me. “She’s in here—” he started, but a pink and purple blur had already rounded the corner and pushed past him to rush my legs. I stood frozen for a split second as my daughter’s scent, lost for a year but never forgotten, filled my nostrils again.
She hugged me tight, her face buried against my thigh. I scooped her up into my arms and she clung, hiding against my neck, shivering the whole time. And it was like Gregor had said, not one word came out of her. But right now, I barely cared as I hugged her and sobbed and leaned against the entry wall as Gregor closed it behind me.
She was home.
Gregor got us over to the couch so I could sit down, my knees were shaking and my whole body was trembling. I worried that any moment I would open my eyes in my own bed and find it a dream, my baby still missing. But—here she was, hugging me back and making little whimpers into my neck that sounded like she didn’t know whether to cry or be happy.
“My baby,” I mumbled into her hair. “Oh God, thank you, thank you.”
It felt like I’d been waiting to exhale for the past eleven months. The police had been useless. I had no family support. Even my boyfriend had crapped out on doing anything decent to help me.
Nobody had been in my corner except for Lorelei and the gang…and this man. This amazing man, who I barely knew but who had already treated me better than almost anyone in my life.
I held my child and felt the wet spot from my daughter’s tears spreading on my blouse, knowing I was a mess and just not caring. Not right now.
Finally, I pulled myself together enough that I could raise my head and look around. Gregor was hovering nearby, and had set a box of tissues on the coffee table in front of me. I fumbled for one and met his gaze as I was wiping my cheeks.
“Thank you,” I told him softly.
“I’m glad to have done it,” he replied, looking at my daughter and me fondly. “Wish I could have done it sooner.”
“I have a million questions,” I said quietly.
He nodded, going into the kitchen. “I’ll put the kettle on. I’ll answer whatever I can.” He came back and sat down on the couch next to us, near, but not too close.
I kept stroking Michelle’s hair as she calmed down. She didn’t seem hurt, she didn’t have any scars I could see. She was too thin, but energetic and her color was good. But I still had no idea what they might have done to her.
“I’ll have to take her to get checked out by a doctor.” Thank God I had kept her on my insurance.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea.” Gregor looked uncomfortable, and I could guess why. They would have to do STI tests on my baby girl. Because the world was what it was. The whole idea tore at me, but I had to be strong and face facts. Her health was way more important than anything else.
Michelle not speaking, not even saying “Mommy,” jarred against my relief, making it imperfect and tinged with a new fear.
“So she hasn’t said anything this whole time?”
“Not a word. For a while I thought maybe she just didn’t talk, but I’m guessing she—”
“It’s trauma,” I said flatly. “She was never a really big talker, but the more scared she gets, the quieter she gets. Now she’s silent.” A few of my tears dropped into her hair. I smoothed them away with my fingertips. “I’ll have to find her a specialist. At least thanks to you and a bunch of other people, I can afford to get her good care.”
I had to look on the bright side, had to hope that Michelle could heal from this like she might a broken limb. That time,patience, and effort would be enough. That it was true what they said, kids really did bounce back faster no matter what the trouble was. That they hadn’t actually done anything besides kidnap her and force her to stay with them.
But I knew that was unlikely. And that thought made me want to kill. It made me want to take the people who had done this and throw them into an industrial furnace. It made me want to rend and tear them like an angry tigress. It made me want to destroy them, make them scared, make them beg, make them suffer like they had done to us, and then erase them from the Earth.
