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“I was hoping this wouldn’t happen. I guess that was stupid of me.” He muttered something under his breath in Russian that I didn’t catch. “I should have told you from the beginning, but I didn’t want to scare you away.”
I was trembling, but I stood my ground, staring into his eyes. “I want thewhole truth, Gregor.”
“Alan told you part of the truth, but not all of it,” he said in a rush. It felt like being slapped in the heart, but I nodded, and he went on. “I was taken in by the mob when I was a young boy. I have always lived that life. It is why I don’t get involved with women long term. It’s why I never expected to have a child, or anything like a normal life. The Ivanovs were handling what was supposed to be a normal porn operation for my boss. Instead, he must have found out what they were doing, because he sent me to the house where they had their studio to kill everyone present and burn the place down.”
I felt sick as I stared at him. Desperation flickered into his gaze as he stared back.
“But as I was going through the place to try to figure out what the hell they had been up to, I stumbled on Michelle. Just this scared little girl caught in the middle of all of this. I had no fucking idea who she was or what was going on, but I don’t hurt kids or leave them in danger. I got her the hell out of there, hid it from my boss, and went looking for her parents.”
I blinked. “You mean you had her this whole time and didn’t tell me?”
“That’s only half right. Yes, I should have told you sooner. But telling you sooner might have endangered both of you. There’s more going on here than even I know and—”
“I can’t take this.” I jumped up, buzzing with adrenaline, walking in a tight circle with my hands in my air. “You’re a mobster? You kill for a living? You had my daughter for days and lied about it?”
“Alissa—”
“No,” I snapped, stepping back as he reached for me. “I trusted you. I trusted you with my daughter. How could you do this? How could you be with me and make love to me and promise us safety when your own people are way more of a danger than Alan ever dreamed of being?”
“I will keep my word to you,” he snapped back. “I won’t let anyone hurt you or Michelle. My feelings for you are real. My actions are real. My integrity is real. And I’ve never wished I was someone else, a better man, someone whose job doesn’t scare you, than I do around you and Michelle. But I am what I am.”
I gulped, tears starting to roll down my face. It embarrassed me, shamed me, but the tears wouldn’t stop. “How did you think this was going to turn out?”
“I had no idea. I was worried you’d run when you needed me most. That no explanation would ever be good enough. In this circumstance, with who had Michelle, with what it took to get her back, only someone in my position could have rescued her. I was hoping you would understand.”
I pressed my lips together to keep the sobs in, but my chest hitched painfully with them. He was a criminal. A killer. The love of my life, the father of my child, was a goddamn assassin.
And yet, he had treated us like gold.
“Gregor…this is a lot…” My voice was low and strained.
“I know. I know. I am sorry. I’m not going to apologize for what I am or what I do, but you deserve better than how I’ve handled telling you. How I’ve handled all of it.” He seemed to be bracing himself for something. Maybe for me grabbing Michelle and running. But where could I go? How could I keep people like Alan and the Ivanovs off me without this big, tough, badassmobsteraround to keep us safe?
Torn, I stared at him helplessly. But before I could say or do anything further, we were both startled by the sound of a key in the lock.
Gregor stood up in shock, but it was too late. The door opened, the alarm started beeping, and half a dozen men with guns poured in through the door.
Chapter 18
Gregor
“Sergei, what the hell are you doing?” I demanded as we were bundled into the back of one of the retrieval vans. I had been searched, my hands shackled, and there were still four guns trained on us.
Beside me, Michelle was curled in a trembling ball around our daughter, whose face was buried in her neck. Seeing her like that filled me with more rage than I had ever known.
“You had better fucking explain yourself right now.”
He turned a grim, resigned expression on me. “I’m following orders, Gregor. The boss thinks you’re plotting against him. And these two know too much.”
“Plotting against him? That’s insane, I’m the one who nearly got blown up earlier!”
He frowned. “Look. I told you to get in to see him and sort this out.”
“I tried. He wouldn’t even respond to my calls. Has he gone completely paranoid?”
But then it hit me. Vasily set up that bomb. He and the others in the organization were the only ones who knew. It was all done under his orders. He tried to fucking kill me!
The shocked look on my face made him pause. He ordered the others to their cars and stepped forward as they reluctantly withdrew. “What’s this about a bomb?”
