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“Language, Daniel,” Mother reminds him of his manners before taking a sip of her vodka. She’s abandoned the Green Tea that’s apparently good for weight loss. Which is brave, considering she was so determined to lose ten pounds before the big day that she ordered her outfit a size too small.
“I’m just saying you should at least give her the option. You have Leia and Wade on the list too, right?” He lifts up the list from the table and studies it.
“They’re not on here, and where’s the other one, Cole, was it? The two of you were close. Why’s he not coming?”
“I’m not sure any of them are coming.” I snatch the list out of his hand and Mother looks just as startled by my outbreak as he is.
“They are all busy people with lots going on in their lives. There are more important things happening than this wedding.” I see the sadness on Dan’s face and try to calm myself down. He doesn’t deserve this.
“They’re your friends and they’re nice people,” Dan points out. “You should at least give them the option to say no.” He kisses my cheek again and when I lay the list back in front of Mom, I fake another smile for her.
“Send one to Maisie and Garrett and to Leia and Wade.” I dread the reaction it might cause. They are both sure to see right through what I’m doing here, but I guess I can’t hide it forever. They will have to learn to accept it, the same way I will, because this is what’s for the best.
1 Month Later
“Thank you.” Maisie snatches the grocery bag out of my hands when I try to help her unload it from the truck. My little niece, Brianna, smiles at me as Maisie carries her inside with her other arm, and Leia ignores me as she follows her through the door with Jack and Jacob balancing on each of her hips.
“Watcha doin’ carryin’ these big lumps around?” Wade takes one of them off her and makes him laugh when he tosses him up in the air like a rider off a bull.
“I mean it. You're supposed to be taking things easy for these last few months.” He relieves her of our other nephew and stands with both of them in his arms.
“I can’t help that they’re too damn irresistible.” Leia kisses both of them, before waddling toward the kitchen to help Maisie put the groceries away. “There's more out there if you want to make yourself useful,” she calls out over her shoulder.
“Least they’re talkin’ to me now.” I shrug at Wade before getting ready to head out the door and bring in the rest of the bags
“They’ll come around. You know how defensive the girls get of each other, and let’s be honest, what you did was a dick move,”my younger brother tells me as he dumps both boys in their play pen.
“Why you being nice to me all of sudden?” I ask. Ever since I told my brothers what I did to Mom, Wade has been givin’ me the cold shoulder and it’s hurt like hell. The last couple of days I’ve seen a change in him toward me.
“I just figure it’s time we all move on from the past. You know, fresh starts and all that. No point dwelling on shit we can’t change.” He seems upbeat. Too upbeat. Come to think about it, so was Garrett this morning. The pair of them have been acting real strange.
I shake it off and head out to carry in the groceries from the truck, and when I see a roll of cookie dough sticking out the bag, it’s another thing that reminds me of Savannah.
She loved to make cookies, her own recipe of course. The house always smelt real fuckin’ good when she’d been baking and I wish it was as easy as Wade made it sound to move on.
I can’t have any regrets about sending her back, not when it was the right thing to do, but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss her every day.
I toss and turn, trying to get back to sleep after I wake up from another nightmare. This time, it’s Savannah who I couldn’t help. I had to look through the window of that place where he kept her and watch his hands touch all the places they shouldn’t. I slammed my fists against the glass, screaming at him to stop and trying to smash it when he made the blood seep from her skin. But it was like no-one could hear me.
And now I’m awake and she ain’t lying next to me, I feel that all too familiar pang of sadness. My mouth is dry and my body is burning so I head downstairs to get myself a glass of water.
It’s 3am and the whole house is silent, so it ain’t a surprise that I jump out my skin when I flick on the kitchen light and see Leia sitting at the kitchen table.
“What the fuck you doin’ down here in the dark?” I hold my hand against my chest and recatch my breath.
“Ain’t dark no more,” she points out, adjusting her eyes to the light.
“I didn’t want to wake anyone.” She holds up the huge tub of ice cream she’s tucking into with a guilty look on her face.
“What are you doing up?” She turns the question on to me and the last thing I wanna give her is the truth.
“Just needed some water,” I growl as I head for the kitchen cupboard to get a glass.
“Grab a spoon,” she tells me.
“Why? Have you been eating with your fingers up ‘til now?” I manage a clever smirk and she rolls her eyes. “Not for me, asshole. I already have one. Grab one for yourself.”
“And what would I want with ice-cream at three in the mornin’?” I shake my head, strangely comforted by how good it feels to have her not being mad at me.
