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He shook his head. “Live without you.”
A chill ran down my spine. “You’ll know where to find me if you can’t.”
He examined my face. “So you’re saying even if you go back, the invitation is open to come and steal you away?”
“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to say no to you, Sigmund Benedictus.”
“So, let’s say I find out from Phil and Kate that you’ve met someone. You’re engaged. Getting married.” He sucked in a breath. “God, just thinking about it, I want to murder him—whoever he is.”
I smiled as I threaded my fingers through his hair.
“You’d be open to me showing up on your wedding night, asking you to cavort with me in your father’s shed, burying my head between your legs, and ruining everything for you?”
“If you must…”
“No.” He shook his head. “It doesn’t feel right—thinking of you with anyone else. Just talking about it makes me vengeful. You’re still the only woman who’s ever made me feel this kind of jealousy.” He cleared his throat. “Alright. I’ll stop. I’m not making this easy.” He ground his teeth. “You told me tonight you’re leaving. I’ll find a way to accept it, if that’s what you want.”
But the look of sadness in his eyes made me unsure of my decision.
CHAPTER 47
Sig
Track 47: “Pray” by Sam Smith
Over the next couple weeks, I made some necessary changes to maximize my time with Abby during the last weeks of her pregnancy, the biggest of which was working remotely until she delivered.
Abby hadn’t returned to her position at Covington. We’d had to fill her post when she’d left for Rhode Island to take care of her father. And with her being at the inn every day, I decided I should be, too.
If there was an emergency, I could always head into London, but I wasn’t going to waste these precious days staring at my office wall when I could’ve been back at the inn staring ather, when I wasn’t on my computer. I shut it down at exactly 5 PM each night and insisted that Abby go for walks with me, since her doctor said light exercise would be good for her circulation.
These days were absolutely my favorite of the entire experience, even if still laced with uncertainty. Every bittersweet moment spent with her felt like a gift:
Early breakfasts together before I had to log in for work.
The way she’d curl up next to me during my conference calls.
Lying next to her every night.
My favorite time was the period after dinner before bedtime. I’d rub Abby’s feet while she and Lavinia put something stupid on the telly. Abby would look at the telly, and I’d look at her. And when she caught me now, I didn’t even try to deny it like I used to.
I’d fallen more in love with her each day but hadn’t repeated the sentiment aloud since that day at Felicity’s. I didn’t want to make things worse when she’d made her decision to leave. The need to tell her I loved her felt constant, though. I needed to convey it in a way that didn’t seem like I was putting pressure on her, trying to sway her into doing something she might never be ready for. But my feelings had only grown since the first time I’d said those words. And she needed to know that.
One evening after I finished giving Abby a foot rub, she fell asleep on the couch. Lavinia chuckled as she looked over and noticed Abby out like a light.
As a light snore escaped through Abby’s dainty nose, I marveled at her beauty. “Isn’t she exquisite?”
I didn’t realize I’d posed the question aloud until Lavinia responded. “Indeed, she is.”
Abby stirred, and her eyes blinked open. She held her hand out for me to help her off the couch. “I have to pee.” She wobbled over to the washroom just off the kitchen.
When Abby reemerged, she clutched her stomach with a troubled look on her face.
“Abby?” I shot up from the sofa. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m getting the worst pain all of a sudden. It’s mostly in my back. But it definitely doesn’t feel normal.”
My pulse began to race. “Shall I call your doctor? He gave us his mobile.”
